Dear KD: What Do I Tell My Friend About His Boyfriend’s Demand?

Dear KD: What Do I Tell My Friend About His Boyfriend’s Demand?

So there’s this friend of mine, let’s call him Damon. He’s been what you’d call a “fuck boy” (don’t worry, he’s proud of it). So he’s done a lot of casual sex with a lot of guys. And then he Greg and Greg changed something in him. He didn’t want Greg for just the sex. He talked to me about it and I told him to give things a try with Greg. And now, they have been together a month and a half and everything was fine until Greg told Damon that they need to start having raw sex moving forward. Now all through Damon’s sexcapades, he’d always played safe, used condoms, but Greg feels that now they’re going steady, condoms shouldn’t feature in their lovemaking.

Damon does not agree and this is something that is beginning to cause a problem in their relationship. Greg wants raw sex, Damon wants protected sex. Damon is confused over what to do. They’ve both undergone tests to confirm that they’re healthy and virus-free, but Damon says he can’t have sex without protection.

So what can he do to save his relationship and/or pacify his boyfriend?

Submitted by Tristan

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15 Comments

  1. Rapum
    November 12, 05:31 Reply

    He should break up with the guy if he insists. You cannot force someone to take a risk with their safety. It should be the person’s personal choice. The fact you’re in a relationship with someone doesn’t mean they own your body.

  2. Lorde
    November 12, 06:10 Reply

    Relationship is not by force…… if Greg will not agree to a 6mths waiting period be 4 another test…he should kick rocks

    • trystham
      November 12, 09:21 Reply

      Six is even too far sef. 3 months…and then only if he is assured Greg is the exclusive relationship type

  3. Foxydevil
    November 12, 07:05 Reply

    Just to correct something, a fuck boy doesn’t mean someone having lots of casual sex with strangers. A fuck boy is an unreliable juu guy, that seldom shows up(when called upon) nor keeps to his words.
    So , having lots of sex does not in anyway make one a fuck boy .
    As for the story ,I’m pretty certain Damon already knows what he wants to do.
    I’ve learnt people are never confused ,they merely wish to be encouraged or dissuaded from choices they’ve subconsciously made.
    🚶

  4. Absalom
    November 12, 08:03 Reply

    Damon should leave the “relationship”.

  5. Black Dynasty
    November 12, 09:08 Reply

    Yea, Damon should definitely not compromise on this stance, better safe than sorry.
    Raw sex is not by force, if Greg insists… then it’s time to part ways i think.

  6. Mitch
    November 12, 09:50 Reply

    He should take some time out to consider whether the ‘relationship’, with its attendant stress and pressure, is what he really wants. If it is, he’d have to find a way to work through this. If not, he should walk.

  7. Kritzmoritz
    November 12, 11:08 Reply

    Simply put and I’m saying it mildly, clean or not, tell Greg he’s an idiot and he’s not at liberty to put someone else’s life at risk for sake of his hormones

  8. himbo
    November 12, 11:46 Reply

    How do you even have anal without condoms? Greg’s a pig.

    • Francis
      November 12, 14:17 Reply

      By knowing what to eat and how to eat douche proper like a pornstar

  9. Francis
    November 12, 14:28 Reply

    I don’t even know what to say sef but one thing is for sure sha, if he ain’t comfortable having bareback sex, he should just end the relationship one time.

    Putting your life at risk for someone should be a personal decision so that when shit happens you know are fully responsible for the outcome.

    Trust and paranoia are super important when it comes to bareback sex and it’s unfortunate that them scarce die these days

  10. Tobee
    November 12, 16:47 Reply

    A possibility is that Damon is being careful considering his sexual history, which may in turn suggest he is being concerned about exposing Greg to risk.

    I would therefore suggest Damon explains about sexual past to Greg and why being careful is important to him. Hopefully Greg would understand some of this as Damon watching out for him. (We also don’t know what Greg has been up to, so it is also Damon looking out for himself).

    If Greg still insists, then Damon needs to evaluate his priorities – safety vs a six-week relationship.

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