I do not know how to live

I do not know how to exist as a person

All I do well is sleep and be alone

I am mesmerized at the people

Who are able to live each day with such aplomb

Able to find joy and peace in the banal things of this life

Everything is hard, everything is strange, and people scare me

I don’t want them to see the cracks

I am afraid they will see the animal underneath the skin

The heavy breaths beneath the porcelain demeanor

I hold onto myself for sanity, my silence is my strongest grip

Please show me how to do this, how to cope, to survive here

I have been drowning since I was born

My feet don’t move with the surety that humans come equipped with

Please show me how to be happily human.

Written by Jodek