I am in big trouble.
Since I became aware of my sexuality, I have had my fair share of gay hook-ups, but my sheer love and attraction for straight guys is out of this world, to the extent that I was almost kitoed once. (Thank God I escaped that).
Maybe I am warped, but I prefer the raunchiness associated with straight guys; I perceive gay guys to be too emotional and clingy and soft. I love rough masculine guys, not necessarily thuggish or beefy; add that to the unavailability straight men represent and the way they seem fuck girls and move on to the next, and it becomes such a turn-on for me.
Apart from my near-kito experience, I have succeeded in gbenshing no less than 7 straight guys between 2013 and 2019 (I am 27), and once the guy starts getting clingy or emotional or gayish, I move on to the next.
Kelechi is the latest straight hookup. He is also my biggest trouble; he is in fact after my life.
In 2018, I got a job around Airport Road in Warri, and transiting from Agbarho was proving to be extremely stressful, what with the hold-up at the army checkpoint close to Okoriphere. So, I began looking for a house around my workplace. Somehow, I was linked to Kelechi, who needed a flatmate to occupy one of the two rooms in the flat he was renting. The rent was quite exorbitant (my share was 170k), but my physical attraction to this guy made me overlook it. I was ready to lay my next straight guy.
Kelechi was a nice person to be around; though he had a very volatile temper, he was not homophobic. I moved in and after a couple of months together, I let go off my bitch and did not hold back my gayness from him. One day, when I was washing the dirty dishes in the kitchen and was shaking my booty vigorously to some music, Kelechi walked in and asked jocularly if I was a gay. I told him yes matter-of-factly. He did not look fazed, but he avoided me for some days. However, he got back to relating with me soon after.
Kelechi’s girlfriend, Tekevwe (TK for short), usually came around during the weekends, and I would put my ear to his bedroom door while they made love. His grunting always turned me on. The way she moaned his name made me picture him naked and sweaty.
He seemed very into his girlfriend and would often gush about her. She was good in bed. She was generous. She was beautiful. She could cook. She had an awesome personality.
I didn’t care.
All I cared for was to have my share of him; then, he could carry on with his girlfriend however long he wanted.
On the eve of 2019, we decided not to go for any crossover church service, because we both believed that the “New Year, New Resolution” thingie was silly. We stayed home and watched some Hallmark movies. We were lounging in the same couch, and when a very funny scene came up, he turned to me in laughter. And I kissed him.
I just reached my head forward and planted my lips against his.
I wasn’t exactly expecting a Hollywood or Disney ending to the kiss, but I certainly didn’t expect what came next.
The slap was a resounding one. I could hear the angels (or demons?) sing as it connected with my cheek. Then the punching started. Kelechi is a bodybuilder. His fists on my body caused my bones to rattle in their sockets and joints.
However, his attack on me turned me on even more.
Eventually, I was able to escape to my room with a bloody nose.
The next day, he called me and apologized for hurting me, but also threatened to kill me if I ever pulled such a “faggot and stupid stunt” on him again. The way he said those words got me rock-hard. I said it wouldn’t happen again and we went back to being cool.
Many of my gay friends had been warning me to stay away from straight guys, that they would kito me, that they would out me. Some other friends would be in awe of my ability to “turn” straight guys. I simply couldn’t help myself. I don’t think my case is so peculiar: there are guys into older men/women, some who only fuck transgender people. So, I don’t see anything so bad in loving what I loved.
On Valentine’s Day, TK couldn’t make it to the house because her sister’s suitors were around for the introduction. Kelechi was distraught. He kept on lamenting about how he would miss a good fuck for the night. I innocently offered to help him out. He shot me an irritated look and bit his lower lip with full force as if he was thinking about – and holding himself back from – pouncing on me with his fists. I told him I was joking.
“You better be,” he growled.
That evening, we got drunk. Well, I was more in control of myself than he was. This was my chance. I reasoned that since he was so inebriated, he wouldn’t know if we did anything and he definitely wouldn’t have the stamina to beat me up.
I put on his girlfriend’s wig, applied light makeup and made out with him.
The next day, he beat me up.
I am not weak or lily-livered. I can actually take on Kelechi. I just enjoyed the man-handling.
Later on, he apologized for beating me.
His girlfriend gave him more excuses why she couldn’t come over for the next three weeks. He was very unhappy about this and kept on complaining about the lack of sex. I was going to offer myself, but I knew the result, so I kept mum.
We were playing Dream League on TV one day, when he turned to me with a frustrated look on his face.
“Wetin?” I said.
He mumbled something which I heard but wanted to clarify. So, I repeated my question. He lifted a finger and requested, rather cockily, for a blowjob. I made him promise that he wouldn’t break my jaw after it and he agreed.
It did not end with the blowjob. With the horny excuse of “I fuck my girlfriend in the ass too, yours should not feel different, nyash na nyash”, he went for my ass and we ended up having sex. Good thing I always cleaned up. (I now knew what TK was enjoying).
I enjoyed the sex and from his expression during and after the sex, I could tell he enjoyed it too.
We fucked every night till TK came around again. And he always reminded me, “I love my girlfriend. This is only temporary.”
Like I cared.
I wasn’t looking for him to love me. The fucking was enough for me. I have a habit of getting turned off whenever any guy starts loving me and wanting more than sex from me.
To cut the long story short, even after TK returned, Kelechi still wanted sex with me. He was now fucking both his girlfriend and me. That did not bother me at first, but when he started becoming clingy and emotional with me, I began giving him space. TK began complaining that her boyfriend wasn’t the guy she used to know, wanting to know if there was another woman. Their sex life deteriorated drastically and their love waned. I was supposed to feel guilty, but I didn’t. As far as I was concerned, Kelechi made the decision to get with me. I did not make him do anything – well, except that one time when we were drunk.
I began to move on with other guys, but Kelechi wouldn’t hear of it. He kept on saying I exposed him to evil and I now wanted to leave him like that. I confronted him with the reminder that he was the one who asked for it.
During that confrontation, he fell on me with his fists. This time, I fought back. There was nothing more I wanted from him. At some point during the fight, he ran to the kitchen to grab a knife, coming at me and shouting that I’d ruined his life. I fled from the house.
Up till now, I haven’t been back to the house. I’ve been hiding out with some of my gay friends, some of who have even gone to plead with him, even if it’s just to allow me back home to pack my belongings. I mean, I have my documents in the house that I really need. But he stayed adamant that until I am dead, he wouldn’t rest.
As I am here, I am confused. This is a big mess that I don’t know how to get out of. I’m also confused about his Kelechi’s behaviour; is a straight guy supposed to be this pained by the rejection of a gay lover? Is he even straight at all? Has he always been straight? Or did having sex with me realize something about him that he didn’t know existed?
How do I resolve this?
Written by Kenny