December 31

Remember how I have been more of a homebody? Well one day, I decided to go out and I needed some money to do that. I wanted to return the aviator glasses a friend of mine forgot at my house. It really was just an excuse to go out. No ulterior motive. Drop the glasses and return my ass home.

My mum turned it to drama with typical motherly questions of “Why can’t he come pick up the glasses himself” and “Don’t go on an idiot’s errand.”

I ignored her and went to meet my aunt and explained why I needed money. She didn’t have. I sha found some money somewhere, when my mum called me into her room. She handed me some money and said that she hopes I am going where I said I am going to and not to do what will make her unhappy because she doesn’t know why I haven’t gotten over “this thing” since, that I shouldn’t think she doesn’t know that people come from Lagos to visit me. That she knows I received a phone call just moments before I decided to leave the house.

*sigh* Assuming much, mother?

The said phone call was from a friend asking for another friend’s number!

I turned my back to her and rolled my eyes and stalked out of the room, only to be called by my aunt who reiterated my mum’s concerns. I responded that whether or not my mother will be happy doesn’t matter, that in the end, I will do what I want to do.

Not to sound insensitive too much but this woman shouldn’t give herself hypertension over me. Perhaps, in the past, I’d baby her and feel sad, but these days, I just feel angry. It’s been what, five years? Abeg! Do I want her to be accepting? Yes. But it’s looking like it’d be a cold day in hell before that happens. So, it’ll be nice if she lets me do my thing and not try to guilt-trip me at every turn. Is that too much to ask?

It’s not even like I don’t get up to worse at school.

In the end, I didn’t go out because my friend decided to come get the glasses himself instead, for a few reasons. No biggie there.

This friend, by the way, is the first guy I made out with. I still remember the night it happened. I was in SS2, so I was probably fifteen. He liked to come to my bed and put his head on my leg. The signals were mixed. Then, one day, when he did it, I leaned over and kissed him. From there, we started to make out and I came in like 30 seconds.

He also gave me my first blow job. This was done in a toilet that was still under construction. We’d been making out, and then he pulled down my pants, hunkered down, and this slippery, wet, warm, oh-my-goodness-I-am-about-to-bust feeling enveloped my dick. And I came in his mouth.

Needless to say he was pissed. My cum tastes bitter (I know because I’ve tasted it and I’ve been told). I ran out of the toilet because I had come to my senses and some level of guilty conscience had replaced my horny teen hormones.

We had a few more make out sessions after that incident. We never had sex though. These days, I think he thinks he’s straight. I’m not interested in meddling but I think it’s either he really was just fooling around back then or he is bi and suffering from internal homophobia. But he seems fine.

*

2017 is here and I’m torn between attempting to make resolutions or not. Either way, I know I’m going to do my best to improve on my art (painting, singing and writing). Hopefully I get into the Farafina creative writing workshop this time. And hopefully I also get a steady flow of business when it comes to the sale of my paintings. Yes, I am advertising myself here! And for free too (*tongue out @ Pinky*).

Those of you who may be interested, the price ranges from 3k upwards; but you’d find most of them in the 3k – 10k price range excluding shipping costs. And no, I don’t do portraits because that’s not my forte.

Yet.

I also hope to grow as a person and learn to be my real and authentic self and learn how to take and discard criticism. I hope for balance within myself because I know I can be a bit too much of certain things, and more often than not, it causes me unnecessary emotional wahala.

2016 was an interesting year. It’d have been meh, but thankfully I found Pookie (*kizzeez*). I also made an awesome friend, Henry. I discarded a toxic friendship, and though I still miss the crazy bitch, I think it’s for the best.

Happy New Year, folks, and thanks for taking time out of your day to read this.

XOXO

Written by IBK

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