February 25

I honestly thought going behind other people’s backs to steal contact details was a thing that died with 2go… Unless 2go is still alive – then that would explain the small absurdity I am experiencing now.

I got a call from someone. He said his name is Sam. I know a couple of Sams but not this Sam. In fact, I initially thought it was someone trying to be smart and kito me. After doing a few background checks, courtesy of true caller and Facebook, I realised he is who he said he is. And that he is friends with a friend – no, acquaintance of mine.

I confronted him about it and he came somewhat clean, admitting that the person – this acquaintance of mine – is his boyfriend, that I should please not tell his boyfriend that we are talking. That he took my number from his phone. That they’d been dating when his boyfriend and I fucked.

Okay… So what does that have to do with me? Why do you want to talk to the person your boyfriend fucked? Why do you want to talk to him so bad that you stole his number? It all sounded fishy AF, this acquaintanceship he was attempting to initiate with me.

He said he just wanted to be friends and all that. Bullshit! I however didn’t call him out on it. He seemed fragile. But this should have been the point where I blocked him, but I didn’t. However, I didn’t oblige him by initiating any conversations, hoping he’d get the message and leave me alone. But nah, the guy was relentless, messaging me and asking where I am and shii.

Things went quiet for a bit until today, when he messaged me and in the process of our chat, I said I was home. He asked to come over. I told him no, that I was busy.

The nigga still showed up.

Like how dafuq do you even know my house!!!

Anyway, that’s enough creepy for me. I don’t get it or him. Maybe that’s why I still hung around. Curiosity. But that’s what I hear killed the cat, and me, I don’t have nine lives. Next thing you know, I’ll get acid on my face for something that happened three years ago. He’s blocked. But he knows where I live. Maybe I’ll tell the gateman not to let him in ever again. Or am I overreacting? Nah, fuck that shit. I’ll overreact away.


Sometimes it’s easy to forget you have minor nut jobs around because you surround yourself with a certain type of people. Many of my close friends are sensible to a degree I am satisfied with.

However I can’t say same for their friends. I have some bad bitches I fuck with. Very nice people. They usually let friends stay with them and I happened upon a couple of them sometime last year. One of them was pleasant the other was meh, but I paid no notice. They’d come and go like a myriad of people before them.

The next day, my bad bitches wanted to come say hello and I told them not to bring their friends because I like my privacy and my vibes were too low to handle a lot of people.

The next day, I went to say hello and while the first guest greeted me warmly, the other one acted cold AF. I was confused by his attitude, and I asked my bitches if I’d done something wrong. They responded. Apparently they had told their guests I didn’t want them around.

Oh, was that why this one that I didn’t know from Adam was eyeing me when I said hello. Like bitch bye.

I proceeded to ignore his existence. It was easy. I guess when someone who doesn’t matter starts pulling stunts, it’s easy to ignore him. Besides I’m not begging to be liked (anymore).

In the end, the guests moved out, but months later, one of them returned. The one who’d greeted me warmly. And as we are spilling tea and dishing desserts, I found out the guy who’d been acting like an ogbanje was having a crush on me.

I laughed long and heartily when I heard that. Apparently even after secondary school, people still carry the behavior to university. The ozwai. Nansense!

Written by IBK

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