KIZITO SPEAKS VIII

KIZITO SPEAKS VIII

Do, Re, Mi, Fa, So, La, Ti, Do… 🙂 lol.

I love singing! There’s not a moment that passes by without me singing or humming or making musical sounds. I’m musical like that… Speaking of singing, that’s what choristers do! And speaking of choristers, there’s the one I’ve introduced you all to. His name is Donald.

I had no inclination toward him, but he felt a lot for me. At first, he was a pest. But overtime, we became acquaintances – close ones. We went for rehearsals together, went home together with Peju. She’s the third in our humorous clique. It was always fun walking home with them sha. Always. Sometimes, we’d have a few other people join us on our walk home. And a few other times, it was alone with Donald. Hmm. Our talks were different, awkward, and other things. Queer talk and gossip. And it was also “Gimme a chance” time. *sigh*

Donald can like to talk. But he had a wonderful sense of humour (I liked that about him). Many a time, he talked about his hook-ups, exes, tattooed boys, Tops who’d agree to bottom for him, because they liked him and would do anything for him. And the compliment he said he so often received was “Nice bod”. This one cracks me up inside. In my mind I’d be like, ‘Nwoke, get a standing mirror and look at ya-self.’ I never voiced that thought.

Hmm.

So, some of our conversations when we walked home from rehearsals a few times be like:

Donald: I no know why person go dey masturbate. Wetin that one mean na? Chai. Tufia! As I dey, I go dey masturbate, for what na? If the thing hol’ me, na to just make phone call. Chai. Nonsense.

Me: Hmmm. People wey no get person nko?

Donald: Abeg. Leave dat thing…

I couldn’t go further with the issue.

* * *

Donald: You don go TB party before?

Me: TB party? No oh. TB party ke. Wetin wan carry me go sef.. How e be?

Donald: Ah, e dey make sense. You go see different people. E dey sweet. Them dey evening start with opening prayer.

Me: Hian. Opening prayer kwa..

Donald: Yes. See you. Them say na “in the name of god of TB!” (And he laughed hard!)

Me: (gasping and looking at him wide-eyed) Ehn?

Donald: Ehen na. See you. The only thing wey dey spoil am na police. E dey make sense, but police matter at times. The last one wey I no go, police raid the place.

Me: Hmmm. Nawa o.

* * *

Donald na character. And he had connection with big boys. I’d once asked him where he met all these people and he told me he knew most of them from Badoo. (And that was how he introduced me to the social app). He’s well known in the Lagos gay circuit though. He is… *cough*

Well, above everything, he has feelings for me. And I dreaded every time we got to my bus-stop together. It was always “gimme a chance” time. And I’d post him with “Ok. I’ve heard you. We go still see…”

Written by Kizito

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47 Comments

  1. Mandy
    July 03, 04:01 Reply

    Exactly! My reaction too. This whole episode was like an afterthought. The writer wanting to couple up something hurriedly together from a not-so interesting week.

  2. trystham
    July 03, 04:28 Reply

    Let me not start on opening prayers at a party. What are u praying for? That u will make perfect smoke rings or that u will ‘quav’ ur crush successfully and get her number? or the reckless sex u hope to have no go enter belle???? MTCHEWWWWW

    • chestnut
      July 03, 06:26 Reply

      “Quav”?…”Enter belle”? I don’t understand…*wide-eyed innocent stare*

    • Jamie
      July 03, 15:22 Reply

      My thoughts exactly… Good things hardly ever come out of these things… It’s just sex, sex, sex and sex!!

  3. QueerMike
    July 03, 05:28 Reply

    *honestly confused*
    And the point here is???

  4. JamesJemima
    July 03, 06:19 Reply

    Well.. I liked this. Felt like one of those short stories you’d see in an anthology.

    Not all stories need to have a point.. Could just be a fun read or something the author felt he should write or talk about just cause he can.. Creative liberty I think.. But for those who couldn’t see any point I do believe kizito wanted to introduce us to his latest suitor and friend.. Donald. Yes, that’s the point of the story I think.

    Now I feel vaguely empty now that I’ve reached that conclusion.. No.. Not that sort of empty you perverted minds. Ugh.

  5. Teflondon
    July 03, 06:22 Reply

    Short piece and precise! I’ve never been a fan.. But I liked today’s piece, probably your best yet. The way you strted and also the way you ended the piece. Actually it’s loads of rambling.. But Hello? **staring at those displeased with today’s piece**
    This is some dairy of a teenager illd assume, someone young.. Right? It’s an oppurtunity to peep into different people’s lives on KD. Young, Old, Rich, naive, poor, strong willed, kind-hearted, Superman and deluded beings et al It’s the beauty of KD actually.
    What were you all expecting him to right.. Albert Einstein- esque write ups?
    **Rme**

    • Sinnex
      July 03, 07:39 Reply

      You just summed it up.

      This is a series from a different angle.

      Some people forget that we are all different people from different backgrounds and with different perceptions of life; the way one reacts in a particular situation is totally different from the way another reacts to same.

      This piece was precise and straight to the point and not filled with mumbo jumbo. It is actually one of the very best.

      Besides, not everyone is supposed to like a series.

      • pinkpanthertb
        July 03, 09:16 Reply

        Sinnex, this is what you said a few comments away about this very same piece.

        ‘Warrisdis?
        For real?
        After waiting for some time for a conclusing….this is all you have to serve…’

        So after eviscerating the write-up, you turn around to realize that it is precise and straight to the point? To be so double-faced on the same post… Tsk tsk.

      • pinkpanthertb
        July 03, 09:16 Reply

        But of course, I’m sure you’ll have a good excuse to explain away your gaffe.

      • Max
        July 03, 09:21 Reply

        You don’t need binoculars to know that this dude #Sinnex takes things personal like a small child. I guess the reason for his comment is because of the backlash he got from his write up yesterday.
        Get over it dude!!

        • pinkpanthertb
          July 03, 09:22 Reply

          I’d understand him reacting like so. but to express that opinion and then come here to have a turnaround opinion just because Teflondon said so… Lol. Kai. at least when someone like Max wants to be a bitch, he remains a bitch to the very end. 😀

          • keredim
            July 03, 10:53 Reply

            PP, you do not bite the hand that pays your data charges..

  6. Sinnex
    July 03, 06:52 Reply

    Warrisdis?

    For real?

    After waiting for some time for a conclusing….this is all you have to serve…

  7. ronniephoenix
    July 03, 07:00 Reply

    one question…
    what is TB….
    all the same, nice write up

    • Ace
      July 04, 02:21 Reply

      Happy birthday bade!

  8. Diablo
    July 03, 09:03 Reply

    I don’t really converse with my friends in pidgin and vice versa ’cause i think its foul. Yes, for market sellers and bus conductors- its appropriate, but not when I’m kiki’ing with friends. naaah

    • Dennis Macaulay
      July 03, 09:39 Reply

      I love you for this!

      I hate pidgin english, but whenever I say it my friends call me an elitist B-word so I just keep mute!

      • Absalom
        July 03, 10:38 Reply

        Biko, pidgin is not foul. It’s a valid other-form of the conventional English, complete with its own grammatical rules and vocabulary. Not everyone is skilled in its use.

      • ollusammie
        July 03, 19:57 Reply

        I beg to disagree. There is nothing foul about pidgin english. Yeaaaa u might hate it, but it is a language I have come to love. Especially when u hear it spoken by those who speak it real good (sometimes sound so musical). Every language in the world has its own foul vocabularies. So u decide what u want to speak – offensive pidgin or unoffensive pigdin.

    • Sam La' Smithereens
      July 03, 10:15 Reply

      Pidgin language is foul? You do realize that pidgin is a universal language that connects people of Nigeria together? -in terms of neutrality and bonding? You know, very much like the Ebonics you chip in sometimes when speaking

      Nobody is asking you to speak it (nobody cares if you don’t) but don’t go off, rubbishing it with a condescending tone when it is an integral part of your Nigerian identity.

      • Diablo
        July 03, 11:36 Reply

        integral part of my Nigerian identity? ehm ok. So i guess being well spoken and articulate isn’t part of my Nigerian identity? So because one is Nigerian one should sound like an illiterate? All pigdin does is place a communication bridge btwn the upper echelon and the lower… and yes pidgin is FOUL.

      • Sinnex
        July 03, 11:44 Reply

        Diablo, are you for real?
        This is the strangest thing I have read in a very long time.

      • Deola
        July 03, 14:50 Reply

        Pidgin is foul? Lmao. What someborry will not hear. Issokay oh.

    • Jamie
      July 03, 15:28 Reply

      Yes, you think!!
      I agree some complications arise from this tye of English creole, but I bet you, it’s got swag when used @the right time. You get am so???

  9. Sinnex
    July 03, 11:15 Reply

    The only one who made sense here is PP and he is the only one I would respond to, The others can crawl back to the caves they came out from or continue scouting for new customers for their ashawo kobo kobo business.

    Now, If you were smart as you claimed, you could have realised that I meant the same thing. I was interested in the Donald story and wanted it to be completed. I remember the last time he updated, he spoke about Donald and other issues. I was captivated by the guy. I did not want it to end. So, when the story ended abruptly, I was taken aback. There is absolutely nothing wrong with the writeup. As you know, I am a very busy person and I can’t go on explaining myself in every post. I wanted to make my comment as brief as possible, then I saw Teffy’s comment, I just had to add something.

    Besides, I have a right to say what I want, same as you guys, at least na una mouth, una fit use am chop shit.

      • Sinnex
        July 03, 11:28 Reply

        Dude, don’t start what you cannot finish. You need to be as neutral as possible…but what do I know!

    • Max
      July 03, 15:28 Reply

      @Busy body Sinnex, Mr busy
      Stop causing unnecessary drama here all the time oga.
      Stop yearning neutrality all the time.. But often quick to tell PP to tame his minions (in your words).

  10. Sinnex
    July 03, 11:23 Reply

    DM, Maybe I might employ you to be my speech writer or editor. It seems like you are very good at what you do. Anyway, you can now run along…my boy!!!

    • Teflondon
      July 03, 12:02 Reply

      Seriously? Lol Sinnex stop just stop all of these. Don’t embarrass us.

      **pulls you out of KD**

      Watsapp right now!!

  11. Chuck
    July 03, 12:15 Reply

    Can we stop using “writeup”? It’s nonsense. You write something. When you’re done, it’s an article, an essay or a piece. Writing up is what police do when they charge someone.

    God bless – and Sinnex, I’ve been proven right. You are to be avoided

  12. lluvmua
    July 03, 13:45 Reply

    Ok Ya all should just let sinnex grieve, he will soon get over it…. lol #beingviolated …… nice write up kizito but ….. spice up d next article pls…

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