Dear Diary,

I am starting to see a pattern when it comes to race in the gay online community. Someone on Kito Diaries who just visited the US talked about the pressure to look good and put your best self forward. I hope he is prepared for the roller coaster ride that is the gay community here.

I recently got back online (partly because I needed more things to tell you, Diary, and also because the guys I want are not responding and the ones I don’t want are seriously on my case, texting endlessly while I stay the pussy, trying not to offend them and hoping they get the message).

The online community has gotten more vain and prejudiced than I was used to. Or perhaps I didn’t notice. The endless profiles going into specifics about the kind of guy that should hit them up is becoming something that should be addressed.

I am starting to see why pressure is on gay men to look fit, masculine with a bubble butt.

The online dating community is a mess and not for the light hearted. If you move to the US and hope to have a sexual adventure, you may meet a shocking surprise.

The defense I hear is preference – “I prefer my guys this way or that way.” However, it has begun to seriously cross the line into prejudice. There is the meter of extremity. For example, the guys who like Black guys absolutely love black guys and the ones who don’t may have their profiles like this: Not into black guys.

You know what, right now, as I am making this entry, I will give real time examples below:

Profile 1 says: Guys I like – White or Spanish, Fit, Muscular or slim, Masculine, Asshole humor

Profile 2 (From a black guy) says: Only into white guys with a bubble butt

Profile 3 (This guy actually hit me up even with this on his profile): Looking For NSA fun. No blacks please.

Profile 4 says: If you don’t know your way around the gym, don’t hit me up.

Profile 5 says: Masc guys only. If you have the Snapchat dog filter, we probably wouldn’t get along.

Profile 6 says: Know your way around the gym and don’t just drive past it.

So, you see, to win here, it seems you must be white, over 6 ft, muscular, masculine, with a beard, scruffy, work out at least five times a week, be superman with a big fat dick, and be able to fuck for hours .

However, sometimes, I sit back and wonder, “What exactly is wrong with having a preference? Why do I feel some kind of way when I see such specifications? Does it not make it easy for anyone trying to hit them up to know that you may not be his type?”

What exactly is wrong with having a type? About black guys that don’t like black guys, are they wrong for their preference? Or white guys that believe black guys are sexual super power tops, are they stereotyping?

Is it better not to have any information on your preference in your profile but just ignore anyone you think is not going to be a match?

Aren’t we guilty of one form of prejudice or the other, considering the comments I saw about Indians in the comments section one time here on Kito Diaries?

Written by Duke

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