The Things We Are Most Thankful For In 2016

The Things We Are Most Thankful For In 2016

In the spirit of Thanksgiving, I asked a great number of KDians for the things they are most thankful for in 2016. I got a lot of feedback, so much feedback that I regret having to cut out most of them. (I apologize immensely to anyone who does not see his feedback featured in the following post).

2016 has been quite a year, a rollercoaster of ups and downs, just steamrolling on from month to month, bringing with it experiences that have shaken us up, amused us, pleasured us, devastated us, and taught us various lessons. Below are instances of all the various ways 2016 has affected the lives of KDians.

1. I am thankful for another kito-free year.

2. I am thankful that I got an opportunity to travel abroad where I learned that prick is not expensive. In the US, going to a bar or a sauna alone is enough to get you good, quality, Negroid, caramel-flavored ass! In Nigeria, before I get one crooked dick, I would have spent 20k at the very least, plus phone that I will have to buy for the fool in the weeks to come. Naija boys always need phone.

3. I’m thankful for the community that Kito Diaries has fostered. There might be disagreements and messy fighting, but just the fact that we gather here, virtually, everyday, makes perfect sense.

4. I’m thankful for Kim Kardashian. God has used her to do great things for me this 2016. Through her, the rest of the world now knows Taylor Swift for the snake that she is. And I couldn’t be happier.

5. I’m thankful for Bobrisky, for showing everyone that you can live in your truth, endure you’re your attitude, and ‘everything’ will be fine. I mean, the dude is living in his truth and he’s become a celebrity just for that! And you know what that tells me? All you need is guts!thanks 5

6. I am thankful that Pinky came back from his LONG writer’s block spell and after 84 years, brought back Love and Sex in The City. Although e be like say the thing still get K-leg.

7. I’m thankful that I found the closest thing to a relationship for me in the gaybourhood. There’s mutual love, respect, admiration and understanding. Even though he’s an MGM, he gets me in the way no other unmarried gay man ever has. I just hope I don’t fuck it up with my hoe-ly behaviour (public opinion, not mine).

8. I’m thankful that the small screen has continued to serve as my favorite way of expressing myself and most importantly, serving as an escape when life becomes too unbearable; so I’m thankful for TV in 2016. I’m thankful that after waiting for years, Game of Thrones finally gave me everything I wanted. I think back on some of the epicness of Season 6 and I still get chills. I’m grateful for the show, The Night Of, for bringing Riz Ahmed to my attention. Not only is he a massive talent, but I now have the biggest crush on him. I’m thankful for the Graham Norton show for delivering my nightly laughs. I’m thankful that Daniel Radcliffe and Paul Dano delivered the best, stupidest, weirdest and most original film I have seen this year in Swiss Army Man. I am thankful that the universe finally realized how incredible Tatiana Maslany is and gave her an Emmy for it.

I’m thankful for Twitter (yeah, seriously) for allowing me to be the weirdest and most original version of myself without worries. I’m thankful for my friends; I still think you people are crazy for putting up with me.

And most importantly, I’m thankful for Bae; I don’t know how I tricked you into liking me, my sense of humor and my myriad of insecurities, but I am thankful that you do. I hope you’ll always find my corny jokes funny and my weirdness adorable, as much as I adore you.

9. In the year 2016, I’m thankful for Queen Cersei, first of her name, ruler of the Seven Kingdoms, Lioness of House Lannister, Queen of the Rhoynar, Andals and the First Men, and the Patron Saint of Dragon Fire! No really, this woman gave me LIFE in the Season 6 of Game of Thrones, and I cannot wait to see what she does in Season 7. I am also thankful for the wine-boarding she dished out to Septa Ulenna. Cersei definitely knows how to do revenge well.thanks 4

10. What am I thankful for? Two things: My mother. And my Yoruba roots. Without the market-women razzness I have embraced, I wouldn’t be here today.

11. I am thankful for my hot, new boss, who is actually annoying, but his firm perky ass makes me forgive and (almost) forget his trespasses.

12. I’m thankful that the hemorrhoid that came after I tried to bottom a handful of times didn’t lead me to surgery. I’m glad it regressed. I’m also thankful that I turned an almost messy breakup that even debuted in an article here on Kito Diaries into an amazing friendship. I’m glad for my emotional stability. I’m glad for the many things that living the single life has taught me.

13. There’s a quote that says something along the lines of: “We don’t conquer our inner demons. We learn to live with them.” Well, after years of denial and ignorance, I am thankful that this year, I finally came to terms with and started accepting my inner hoe. Don’t judge me; I’m facing my truth. Face yours. 2016 was the year I began giving life to the hoe inside me.thanks 3

14. I’m thankful for self control, the ability to say no and not feel guilty, especially when it comes to sex. I’m still a bit of a hoe, but it’s not as bad as it was last year. Especially considering the offers I get here. Like the one I got from a guy asking me to come shag him and his mother. When I refused, the idiot offered to pay me. It’s something to be thankful for. Sex was almost running my life. I’d spend almost half my day on hookup sites, and nearly every guy I met became a wank fantasy. 2016 gave me the self control I needed to overcome my wild desires.

15. I am thankful for love. Love found me this year and I believe it’s about to take me places. Love made me more cautious and considerate of people, and it instilled in me a discipline I needed to stay faithful to my partner.

16. I’m thankful for all the international organisations funding key populations, mostly the MSM community, in the fight against HIV. I’m also thankful that PrEP is now available in Nigeria, and that anal cancer screening for MSM is now being done in Nigeria.

17. I am thankful for life, love, moments I thought were love, friendships, and unreplied messages. I’m thankful for all the amazing albums that were released this year from greats like Beyoncé, Solange, Lady Gaga, Britney Spears, Drake and Kanye. Music helped with my surviving this year which had almost all the saddest events imaginable. I’m thankful for family and friends. I’m thankful for cartoons like Family Guy, Ricky and Morty, and South Park, and for books and the amazing writers that authored them. I’m thankful for the great sex I had and the not-so-great sex that makes me cringe whenever I remember them. Finally, I’m thankful for a platform like Kito Diaries, a place where I can be myself.

18. I am grateful for Kito Diaries. I don’t comment often, but I’m grateful for everyone’s contributions to the blog, because even if no one knows it, some posts here help me overcome life’s hurdles. I am grateful to the universe for bringing Bae my way. His presence in my life has changed my view of different things in a very positive way. He has made me meet new friends, experience new things and made me feel very loved. I’m also thankful for fantasies, for the men who make my fantasies exist. Men who are tall, muscular, bearded and dark-skinned. Men like Lynxxx and Billy Brown, who plays the character Nate in How To Get Away With Murder; I just want to lick every inch of these two sometimes.thanks 2

19. 2016 can be said to be my year of psychological transformation. I developed personally, and met with a lot of great people in the LGBT world, which helped my journey. I’m thankful for how in this year, I was able to discover things in me that I didn’t know existed or maybe did but was too chicken to dig deep for.

I found myself this year. I’d always had warped opinions of certain issues, mostly one-sided or borne from personal experiences while I was growing up. But this year, my life had slowly turned into something like a newly purchased diary upon which new experiences are being recorded without fear of what I think or what people would say. With every passing day, I feel stronger, better, renewed. More vocal than I ever was.

20. I got a letter from one of the students I taught during my youth service three years ago. The letter arrived with a N50 stamp, all the way from Enugu, handwritten, in three pages of foolscap paper and sealed in a white envelope. It was a very special experience. The letter is the first handwritten letter I’ve ever gotten, and just thinking about it now brings tears to my eyes – the words, their sincerity, the thought behind the letter, everything. It brought back memories, and so I’m thankful for the gift of love, the ability to open my heart to teenagers and influence them and have that influence mean a lot to them.

21. I’m thankful for the support I’ve been getting from my siblings since I came out to them, and for the confidence that coming out has given me. So far, I’ve walked the streets and shopping malls here in Lagos while holding hands with my boyfriend, and I’m still alive and no one has hurt me.

22. I’m thankful that I finally got to make out with my longtime crush. I’ve known him for four years and in that time, nothing intimate has ever happened to us. And then, sometime this year, he came to Lagos, called me up and invited me over to his hotel. Lying next to him was like the best gift in the world. I’ve never being one for mushy stuff, but I felt so much joy throughout the week we were together.

23. Of all the things I’ve experienced in the year 2016, the one I am most grateful for is how I fought the battle of my status. I religiously followed my meds with much zeal for close to two years, never missing a dosage. And with the moral support of a few close friends and family, my viral load was successfully suppressed. It’s been a long, tough journey. I battled depression. Accessing drugs was tough. And there were crazy side-effects to the medication. But I made it through. Now my health is very much stable and the viral level is well suppressed.thanks 7

24. What I’m most thankful for this 2016 is the gay couple, Johnnell Lyric Terrell and Tyrone Wells. They’re lovers who constantly celebrate their lives together on Instagram. Through them, I am slowly but surely believing that gay love is possible. They have also been very incredible wanking devices.thanks 6

25. I’m thankful for Ozumba, the mentally-ill vagrant who often abides close to my house. He brought the LGBT struggle into sharper focus for me. He is the reason I will never give up on whatever I can do to change tomorrow for the Nigerian LGBT community, to ensure a time will come when no one will ever have to suffer like he suffered anymore.

26. I’m grateful for the KDian and my friend, Lothario, for exposing a recluse like myself to the wonderful world of Nigerian gay men that have sense. I’m also grateful to KDians for sharing their relationship dynamics, fears, likes and what-have-you. Their stories have helped me understand that we all can’t thread the same path as we find ourselves in unique situations. You choose your path and hope it brings you the happiness or whatever it is you seek while being conscious of the fact that whatever the outcome of your journey, it’s all on you! In other words, Kito Diaries has reinforced the need to “Live and Let Live”.

27. I am thankful for every misfortune I have suffered this year, from estrangements and loss of employment to bad hookups and unfinished ventures. Every bit of these disappointments have given me a better appreciation of life and the people who matter most to me.thanks 1

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36 Comments

  1. Mandy
    November 24, 06:25 Reply

    The guy who’s thankful for Kim Kardashian though. ??????
    And while someone is thankful for being a hoe, another is thankful he’s not being a hoe. Such diversity.

  2. Olami
    November 24, 06:32 Reply

    This is by far one of the most interesting. Post I’ve read all year, doesn’t time commenter, regular and religious reader lol. You all have by far made me accepting myself and livin the truth of who I truly am be the easiest thing. Waking up every morning to read had always been joy to my heart. Thanks for IBK journal, you are a really nice and interesting person, thank you Henrie for being one of the realist persons I’ve ever met, thanks DM for your stories, would love to meet you someday. Thank y’all in all. Much love

  3. Francis
    November 24, 06:32 Reply

    ?????????? @ Number 2. Please why do we shame escorts and ashewos again? Make una remind me

  4. Chandler B.
    November 24, 07:22 Reply

    I think I’m also thankful for Bobrisky. Yes, he might have made one reckless statement or the other and hasn’t publicly said he is gay but there is a fearlessness about how he chooses to live that kinda says ‘I’m not giving you the power to dictate how I live’. That kind of thing, when found in numbers, would push back these homophobes from thinking they own us.

    I also join number 16 and 17 (without the cartoon bit. I haven’t seen those) to be thankful.

    And I hope to be thankful for this in 2017:
    “…Love made me more cautious and considerate of people, and it instilled in me a discipline I needed to stay faithful to my partner.”

  5. ambivalentone
    November 24, 08:09 Reply

    Number 2 is an angry man though. I thought being gay was all about using what you are to get what u want and was the generally accepted and economically viable way of life? Why the rant? We should even ask whether some chief somewhere didn’t elevate u to ‘Been to’ status.??

    No 20 is soooo sweet. It was so not generic. I remember how excited I was when I got my first letter.

  6. Khaleesi
    November 24, 08:19 Reply

    This is beautiful! Pinky, i think you should turn this into a weekly or bi-weekly series that’ll run from now until the end of the year and maybe into the early part of next year. Its interesting to read about the variety of things that bring hope and joy to the average KD-ian amidst so much adversity …

    • Michael
      November 24, 10:42 Reply

      That’d be a great idea PP. That way more people can say what they are tgankfull for.

  7. Peak
    November 24, 08:23 Reply

    A wow read, if I must say.

    Thanks guys for sharing.

  8. .•*Sugaar.•*
    November 24, 08:24 Reply

    Me am thankful to God for all of you guys in this platform… May God take you to places you desire and may we finish 2016 with joy and gladness…
    And for we that don’t have idea where this REQUEST has been posted, was it on fliers on the streets of Lagos or here on KITODIARIES… I say THANKS. Cheers!!

  9. Law
    November 24, 09:04 Reply

    I am thankful for my sister who has accepted for who I am all these years and has stood by me relentlessly… Am also thankful for my past relationship which jst ended recently… And giving me the most wonderful ex boyfriend ever…. Am thankful for my new job…

    • Francis
      November 24, 10:43 Reply

      Aaaaw, someone had an amicable breakup ???

  10. Chizzie
    November 24, 09:17 Reply

    Thankful for the business venture that i embarked on that has proved to be a success, and how I can now afford good toning creams, and how my market generally has been selling both literally and figuratively..

    I hope some of you broke ones have a complete turn around in your finances in 2017 ☺️

    • ambivalentone
      November 24, 09:25 Reply

      ???*laughing in spiritual powers*????I see now where the support for Bobrisky comes from. You don’t want him slipping sulphuric acid in ur concoction…sorry, good toning cream, by mistake. So u r this insecure

      • Chizzie
        November 24, 09:33 Reply

        Hope you said a big amen to the last bit Ambi, cause we both know u need it, and it’s long overdue. I still believe your Glo up will eventually happen sister. ?

        • ambivalentone
          November 24, 09:54 Reply

          My dear, this recession ehn. Its a good wish after all and the only bit of the whole that wasn’t tripe. So yes, my ‘Amen’ was pretty loud.

  11. INDIGENE
    November 24, 11:21 Reply

    I am thankful for the love I found in 2016! I never believed in long distance relationship but this year I fell in love with a guy I can give up everything for! he has been ever sweet and I cherish him to the moon and back!

    To kitodiaries, here was a stepping stone for my full acceptance! I always come here to read stories when I am dawn. Thanks lovelies!

  12. Delle
    November 24, 12:16 Reply

    Sincerest piece ever!

    Was it only me that mentally tried matching each experience to a pseudonym?
    The wanking own shaa…oh church!

  13. Spectra
    November 24, 13:06 Reply

    I’m thankful that in 2016 I’ve really learnt how to improve my self esteem and stand high with confidence among my peers. I’m thankful for my new job which has been awesome. I’m thankful that I’ve learnt how to cope well with my status as a HIV poz guy and that I can become whoever or whatever I want to be.

  14. Mitch
    November 24, 16:51 Reply

    This is beautiful!

    Now this is the reason why this forum was created in the first place. The beauty in our vulnerability, learning new things daily, growing into better versions of ourselves – all of these are the beauty of Kitodiaries. May we never lose this.

  15. Loftus
    November 24, 17:30 Reply

    I’m thankful that I met Pinky (virtually tho). Guy, u’ve bn a grt friend

  16. Anita
    November 24, 18:40 Reply

    Im thankful I stumbled on this blog afew days ago..never knew anything about your world..i must say,u lot are really interesting..Im actually a girl who likes girls,hope im welcome

    • iAmNotAPerv
      November 24, 23:02 Reply

      You are more than welcome Anita! Let me introduce myself, i’m Ife. Ife Pervy. I would love to take you round the world of KD. I am a girl who likes boys and girls (since we are stating what we like) i also like caprisonne. like a lot.
      Mr Panther do i have your permission?

      • Pink Panther
        November 25, 06:31 Reply

        By all means. 🙂 About time ladies cultivated friendships on this blog.

  17. KingBey
    November 24, 22:40 Reply

    I’m thankful for the gift of life, my partner and my ever supportive family. ❤

  18. johnny
    November 25, 07:16 Reply

    I am thankful because I met my wonderful boo this year, very supportive and make me realise i can have someone love me despite being gay. I am thankful for having a job that fetch me at least $80 per month now and I am topping studies. I am thankful for KD and KDians. You are my source of happiness and hope. I love you all
    BTW, I don’t know why I don’t have any crush here.

  19. Eddie
    November 25, 08:58 Reply

    what am i thankful for sef??? Hmmm lemme see umm i’m alone, broke,got an extra year in the university due to some failed courses,nobody likes me…well,at least i’m alive sha so i guess i’m thankful for that *shrugs*

    • Pink Panther
      November 25, 09:06 Reply

      It’ll get better and there’ll be a multiplication of more things to be thankful for.

  20. Osas
    November 25, 10:15 Reply

    I don’t know what to be thankful for, my ex is is forming NAFDAC on the men coming my way, am down, school is crazy, and recession is like sharing my life with me, I have gone through all the disappoinments anyone would give up on life for, but I am thankful for HOPE!

  21. Zol
    November 26, 01:18 Reply

    Nice!!!
    Quick question, how did you deal with your hemorrhoids, cos I seem to be going through the same issue.
    Lol, you can’t imagine the things that constantly run through my mind.
    *eyeing everyone frantically*

    • Zol
      November 26, 01:20 Reply

      And everyone, feel free to pitch, the good, the bad and the judgmental…

      • Pink Panther
        November 26, 07:31 Reply

        If you have a problem that you need the input of KDians for, there’s this column for it. It’s called the Dear KD column. You can check out previous posts on it. And then perhaps send in your dilemma to get posted so opinions can inform you on what to do. 🙂

        • olamilekan
          November 29, 14:55 Reply

          hello pink panther….m kinda new here nd I also a good writer,a friend of mine actually introduced KD to me nd after goin through some of the posts and write up I must say this is a place to be
          I hope I am utmostly welcomed.pls how do I get my write ups or piece of work published

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