13 responses

  1. KingB
    December 26, 2019

    There’s this guy in my church, we are both choristers. He’s kinda muscular and shit but then the first day I saw him, I saw the queen in him. Very obvious he’s trying to cover up his effeminate nature by working out. I on the other hand, I’m very macho looking, but once in a while I love to throw my hands in the air while talking and act girlish. He saw me did that once and started avoiding me. I think the plan was to stay away from anything that would draw out and girlish act from him. When I noticed, I kuku started avoiding him too. I can’t come and allow anyone’s insecurity affect me. When he noticed I didn’t give a fuck about his existence , he decided to start saying hi to me again but of course I’d be a fool to respond to him.Most times he can’t dance, express himself freely while talking and is usually very conscious of his move during rehearsals. Me in my mind I’m like, bitch live free! You’ve got just one life.This homophobes don’t care about you. Be ya fucking self.

    Reply

    • Pink Panther
      December 26, 2019

      LOL. Do him a favour and preach this good news to him, if you can. Some people just don’t know any better. Sometimes, they’re all alone in their struggle and think the (self destructive) path they’ve taken is the best. Not saying you’re obligated to, but maybe allow the friendship he seems to be wanting with you and in time, let your own light influence him to do better by himself.

      Reply

    • Pink Panther
      December 26, 2019

      Unless you find out he has IH that has reached toxic levels. Then don’t even bother.

      Reply

      • KingB
        December 26, 2019

        I’m also suspecting he might be internally homophobic but not sure. I also don’t think I owe him any sort of friendship. My family is horrifically homophobic but I closed the path of happiness because I knew I’d have to find that myself. Let him do same.

        Reply

    • Francis
      December 26, 2019

      This is very sad 😔 E reach to cry for the nigga

      Reply

  2. Mitch
    December 26, 2019

    Sense is obviously very far from the Korma individual. I mean, you can’t see words strung together in both wrong tenses and spellings with all the grammatical errors to boot and expect the person who wrote it to be sensible. Or for his write-up to make sense.

    Jesus be a fence against stupidity!

    Reply

  3. Mikey😘
    December 26, 2019

    Pinky you’re all in for the femmes this days oh
    well for me and my bestie we are both effeminate but anytime we are outside he keeps straight face and start walking somehow encouraging me to do the same, when I don’t he starts giving me space. I love him too much if not I could have cut him off

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    • Ken
      December 27, 2019

      Are u out to your parents, family and loved ones? If yes, then u have every right to disregard your bestie advice, but if no, then I don’t see the point in drawing that kind of attention. Or if u must, then your best has every right to do that which he thinks best suits him. To each his own and we all have right to make our own choices. Not everyone wants to be a superhero

      Reply

      • Mikey😘
        December 27, 2019

        I’m out to my siblings but I haven’t told my parents but they know their son/daughter, I don’t see the need too after all they gave birth to me and they know me from day 1 so my character us nothing new, meanwhile my bestie claims everyone is homophobic in his house but I think that’s not true cause they are very nice to me and all
        And finally I suck as pretending but I’m good at acting but I can’t act someone else and leave me authentic role

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      • Ken
        December 28, 2019

        Ok, so you are entitled yo live your truth as it suits u, but u can’t expect everyone else to do the same. Just bcos the parents are nice to u doesn’t mean they will accept their son. It’s a different relationship. Your friend has the right not to come out. To each his own. All u have to decide is if your friendship can survive your individual decisions

        Reply

  4. Ken
    December 27, 2019

    Well it’s easy to live in fantasy and believe everyone will eventually accept u for who u are, but that’s not how life works. The fact is u can get lynched and hurt just for being effeminate. I don’t think the comment comes from a place of homophobia, korma is just stating the obvious. Doesn’t mean u shouldn’t be who u are but in Nigeria (and most antigay communities) we all must learn to live cautiously.

    Now it’s also true that the kormas comment can inspire hate for one’s true self (internalized homophobia) but the trick is knowing where to draw the line. In the end nothing beats self preservation. Even the hypocrites claiming authenticity are very much hiding under several thick layers in the closet.i mean if u are not out and proud, why chastise someone for preaching the same??? Fact is know who u are, and know when to be who u are. You may not like it but that’s our reality. Your harm, humiliation or even death is unnecessary, that’s your first goal.

    Reply

  5. Mikey😘
    December 27, 2019

    Ken no effeminate guy wants everyone’s acceptance we actually don’t Care about that, we are okay with the few that accepts us if we were looking for everyone’s acceptance we would be trying our possible best to be that person they want is to be but no we do our things for ourselves
    Our happiness first, we know it’s not easy but its our fight not yours so you can shove ur advice up ur ass

    Reply

  6. Dayve
    December 27, 2019

    I love this piece. Thank you for saying this. The last part about homophobia not being selective and how they are the problem and not us is both instructive and insightful
    Thanks for sharing this piece PP.

    Reply

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