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First Quarterly Review: Lessons From Kito Diaries

So there I was, minding my own business, when I get a Facebook IM from PP asking me, in his inimitable school teacher fashion, why I hadn’t commented on KD


  1. Francis
    September 18, 07:51 Reply

    Let’s keep it rich, smart, funny and faithful. ??

  2. Ace
    September 18, 08:00 Reply

    Good in bed, rich and faithful 2. 5. 10

    • Pink Panther
      September 18, 08:04 Reply

      *GASP* Max! I didn’t know you’re a Big-Dick whore.

      • Francis
        September 18, 08:05 Reply

        ?? let the revelations begin.

      • Max
        September 18, 08:08 Reply

        Its never been a secret Na. I always scream it here. Its a requirement and can’t be compromised over in my checklist. It just feels better to look at, touch, or yank in your mouth. Don’t have time for small canes biko.**throws face away*

        • Pink Panther
          September 18, 08:09 Reply

          My my my! This is a first I’m hearing of it. Who woulda thunk it? lol

        • Francis
          September 18, 08:11 Reply

          We evidently missed those announcements. Lol.

    • Khaleesi
      September 18, 08:43 Reply

      ***drumroll**** we are pleased to announce the discovery and unveiling of KDs newest size queen – Lady Maxine!!! ****bows and scampers off amid thunderous applause***

  3. Greyjoy
    September 18, 08:09 Reply

    6,8,9,10. Francis marry me please…

    • Pink Panther
      September 18, 08:11 Reply

      Ok that was fast. You’ve already shopped for the Mr Right and asking for delivery at once?

      • Francis
        September 18, 08:14 Reply

        @PP no time to waste. Man don dey old.?

      • Greyjoy
        September 18, 08:29 Reply

        I don’t want another Saturday to meet me unmarried.

        • Francis
          September 18, 08:53 Reply

          ?? Eeeya, I hope say you no want pikin too sha. That one no dey my agenda as I no get patience and brain cells to wreck on top them.

    • Francis
      September 18, 08:13 Reply

      How much dey ya account? *begins planning obodo oyibo waka Kere-baby style* ???

      • Greyjoy
        September 18, 08:35 Reply

        I’m gonna have my accountant fax you proof that you are about becoming the trophy husband of a billionaire. Can you say yes already?

        • Francis
          September 18, 08:59 Reply

          Trophy husband things?! *checks sef in mirror* Mba. I no fit that bill at all bet your money can rearrange a few things here and there sha ?? *see me yarning as if I can stand the sight of blood and surgical blade*

  4. Santa Diaba
    September 18, 08:29 Reply

    Perfect man huh? I’ll rather keep my $5 and buy myself ice cream, sharwarma, and curl up in front of my TV watching reruns of “girlfriends”

    • posh6666
      September 18, 09:05 Reply

      Awww i miss girlfriends cant even remember how it dissapeared frm my lappy.Especially that girl with the smart mouth,she’s on hollywood divas now.Big dick anyday for me,funny and must be ruggedly handsome too,who needs a smart guy?as if life isnt boring enough alot of times i dont need a stuckup dude abeg who takes life too serious and alwayd trying to figure shi out.

    • kacee
      September 18, 14:39 Reply

      MM 20 for what? *frowns* pls PP don’t corrupt my Bae. lol

  5. KryxxX
    September 18, 08:38 Reply


    I so hate shopping! And its even worse when one has limited fund! Oh well, necessity they say is the mother of invention! Lemme pick the necessary **Drags out my shopping cart**

    1. Hmmn! Handsome? I wouldnt mind but its too dear! Gonna take a bulk of my cash! And what would one do with a handsome face nd ugly body? Biko, I pass you!

    2. Oh la la! Nice body…. I like! I like! I like! Mustn’t be Trey Songz nice but as long as there no potbelly or love handles going on, good to go! Under consideration!

    3. Nice Ass? Love me a well defined ass on me man! Something to hold on to nd urge him on for more, or to ogle/smack when he strut about in briefs or tight pants **moans**. But since he won’t be needing it for much bedroom activity like I would be doing, we shall pass.

    4. Big dick? Good for viewing pleasure only! Maybe a lil bj on days when I have a deathwish to choke nd die! But u ain’t getting near this ass! So, ngwa swerve!

    5. Y is dis one $2 naa? Not to huge on sex so we go manage am badly on d days we do!

    6. As long as he is comfortable nd am not footing his bills, we dont mind if he is not rich!

    7. **screaming** Yes! Yes! Yes! Tall, he must be!! He definitely must be! Musnt be as tall as me, but hell he must reach my shoulders or neck!

    8. Of course he has to be smart! Duh! I wouldn’t want my eyes to drop off my sockets due to much rolling out of boredom/disgust when we r having a discuss! He has to!

    9. My mumu is enough for both of us! Espeaelekwe! Me is a clown nd would want someone who @ least has a sense of humour to put up with my iberibe!

    10. **snaps fingers in zig-zag formation** As long as am faithful, you sure haff to be or I put otapiapia in ur meal!

    So, Nice body -Check!
    Tall – check!
    Smart – Double check!
    Faithful – You just have to be! You dont wanna die! Checcccccccccccckkkkkkkkkkk!

    Oh no! My cart is carrying more than I can pay for! So, Since am stuck with one extra above my budget, I guess I will just shoplift “tall” naa! Sharp guy no be thief!

    Ngwaaaaaaaa, byeeeeeeeeeeee!

    • Pink Panther
      September 18, 08:45 Reply


      I just knew Kryxxx’s comment would be priceless. Kai! iDied!

    • Francis
      September 18, 08:51 Reply

      It’s evident some of us don start weekend already. See analysis ???

    • kacee
      September 18, 14:41 Reply

      kryxxx u just killed me.

    • amuma
      September 20, 01:04 Reply

      A platform should be created on this blog where we’d have sex with whoever we wish here, through the words of the mouth. Only God knows what I would do to Kryxx. I love this analysis.

    September 18, 08:48 Reply

    Am more of a sapiosexual………once he’s smart, on a sexy body, the rest is history………

  7. Justin Case
    September 18, 09:02 Reply

    I’m just wondering how the current exchange rate would affect the features I can afford

  8. Griffin
    September 18, 09:05 Reply

    Nice ass $2, Smart $1, funny $1, faithful $1

  9. Mandy
    September 18, 09:06 Reply

    Handsome $3 Nice body $3 Good in bed $2 Rich $2
    Jeez, these commodities are too damn expensive for a supermarket where everything is looking GOOD! *hungrily looking from aisle to aisle, tapping my shopping cart impatiently*

  10. james bruno
    September 18, 09:20 Reply

    good in bed…

    keep the change

  11. Teflondon
    September 18, 10:23 Reply

    4, 7 and errrmm!! can i have some more 4?

  12. Andrevn
    September 18, 11:06 Reply

    It definitely would be 4,8,9,10 and 6
    A bro is allowed to make purchase on credit. No?

  13. Ruby
    September 18, 11:17 Reply

    Umm… Pinky…
    Do I really have to shop for Мy perfect man???
    I’m already living with mine *staring Lovingly at HERO*
    <3 <3 <3

  14. sinnex
    September 18, 11:55 Reply

    2 and 3 is more than enough for me.

  15. michael
    September 18, 13:55 Reply

    $5 won’t be enough. can I borrow extra $2 PP?

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