The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly about Having an Unusually Small Penis

The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly about Having an Unusually Small Penis

Originally published on queerty.com

According to the all-knowing Wikipedia, a micropenis is an “unusually small penis” with an “erect penile length … smaller than about 7 cm.” It is a condition that affects about 0.6 percent of males and that is rarely ever talked about. Until now.

One brave man has opened about his life with a micropenis to New York Magazine during an in-depth interview, discussing everything from scarring sexual experiences, to experimenting with men, to the types of condoms he uses. The 51-year-old English teacher from the U.K. bared all — the good, the bad, and the ugly — about what it’s like having an infant-sized penis.

Here are a few highlights from the interview…

On when his penis stopped growing:

I was 14. Quite honestly, my entire life has been shaped and damaged by my penis size. I’m still not really over it, even though I’m way into middle age. I’ve had relationships, but they’ve never been terribly good, particularly not from my partner’s point of view. I always feel like I can’t do what I should be able to do as well as most people. That’s what I worry about. And doctors have never been any help.

On his first sexual experience:

It was traumatic. I was 21 and it was at a party. I’m very sociable and I love parties. This was a big house party and a lovely girl really took to me; she really enjoyed my conversation and she was the one who suggested to me that we go upstairs and find a bedroom. This had never happened before … She undressed and then she helped me undress, because I wasn’t very keen to take my clothes off. She started trying to get me hard because she couldn’t really see what was there. I guess she was hoping it would change, or get bigger. I did get semi-hard but it wasn’t enough and I couldn’t penetrate her … We got to a certain point and she couldn’t hide how disappointed she was. She was quite annoyed and I don’t blame her at all; to this day, I don’t blame her.

On actually losing his virginity:

It was great, even though it was also embarrassing. It was much better than the first time because the girl I was with was very experienced and knew how to deal with me; she just knew how to get what little I had to offer. She knew how to get that little thing inside her! She made the most of what I have. And she was sweet and lovely and laughed about it all and she was fascinated by how small it was. I had a relationship with her for almost a year. But she lost interest in having sex with me, she had other boyfriends, and eventually she became a lesbian.

On having penetrative sex:

It’s really very difficult. All the other things are fine: oral, manual and I have never got into all the additional things, the toys, the strap-ons and the vibrators. I don’t like it. I love bodies, touch and all those things are great, but full sex is something I just can’t do properly. My penis is just not big enough. When I’m having sex I’m always aware that she’s probably pretending to enjoy things more than she really is, and the last woman I was with admitted that was true and that just stopped me dead. I knew it was true and of course it’s not her fault, it’s my fault.

On experimenting with men:

For a while I thought, It’s no good. I thought maybe I should just be gay — maybe I could just be a bitch to a gay man, I could take it up the ass. But I didn’t enjoy it very much and I realized I wasn’t gay. You’re either gay or you’re not; you can’t make yourself be gay. But I really liked the whole world of gay men and women — the scene, but not the sex. I did sleep with a few guys, though.

On when having a small penis works in his favor:

Oral sex. Giving it rather than receiving it. I’m often worried that women feel they have to return the favor, but I would need to be very thoroughly persuaded that any woman would really want to put my horrible little penis in her mouth, and then taste the result. I would like to think I might be good at other things — maybe as a gentle, miniature introduction to anal sex, but I have never had the nerve to ask if it might be wanted.

On warning his partners beforehand about his micropenis:

I usually say, “I don’t think you’re going to be terribly impressed, but this is what I’ve got.”

On the last time he had sex:

Twenty-one months ago. February 2013.

On condoms:

When I was desperate to get into bed, to get into women, I was trying to find condoms that worked, but I still haven’t found one. You can get ones that are really small, but there’s so many sad stories of that. Oh no. There are small ones these days, but back then you couldn’t. It was one size fits all, and it didn’t. It didn’t fit at all by any means, and of course the few girls that I’ve known had practiced with their boyfriend the best way of putting on condoms, but when they met me and had to deal with me, it was just totally different. It’s not like a banana at all; it’s a little battery. All I can ever do is say, “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

I know a bunch of Bottom friends who won’t give this man the time of day. They be like, Micropenis, what’s that going to do for my shobosho? LOL. One of them reads KD dedicatedly. You know yourself.

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    • Ace
      December 04, 04:19 Reply

      “Little battery” poor guy, i can imagine. I think it is difficult to find a black guy with micro kini. We were born endowed e.g Fab—–.

      • kendigin
        December 04, 04:46 Reply

        u would be wrong….very wrong. not everyone is endowed. if u attended boarding school like me, u wld knw wot i mean

      • pinkpanthertb
        December 04, 04:54 Reply

        Difficult to find a black man with a micropenis? Ah, you couldn’t be further from the truth. don’t buy into that myth about black men and endowments o

  1. kendigin
    December 04, 04:49 Reply

    i knw sm pple will rush to say its bcos hes white that hes less endowed. well news flash: the guy with the biggest dick in this world is white as well!

    • pinkpanthertb
      December 04, 04:59 Reply

      Oh never mind. Googled him. Jonah Falcon. but Google ain’t showing the dick nah. 🙁

      • kendigin
        December 04, 05:09 Reply

        haha
        search very well. i used to have it on my fone but deleted it on acc of the fone falling into wrong hands.

        Johns tool is uncomfortably humungous..

  2. Dennis Macauley
    December 04, 05:25 Reply

    Good for you sef that you are straight! If he were gay? Except he bottoms exclusively, some of these size queens around the block will simply dress up if you pull down your pants and they see a tiny dick!

    I went to boarding school in the east, there was this guy who always had his bath before everybody at about 4am. The rest of us loved to walk around naked to and from the bathroom, especially if you are endowed. I particularly am a closet nudist (lol), but you will never ever see this guy naked. I was a bit curious, till one day I caught him wanking in the shower; his dick was the size of a lipstick and it was hard. I almost could not believe that a dick could be so small.

    We are still friends till today, he works in abuja but he practically has zero sex life

    • kendigin
      December 04, 05:30 Reply

      lol i cant stop laffing

      But the penis is truly am amazing body part. And truth be told: size isnt all that matters.
      There is smone for everyone in this world. If ur body has failed u, u can always rely on ur bank account. lol

      • Dennis Macauley
        December 04, 05:38 Reply

        Sweetheart it’s a lie we often tell! Size does matter! Nothing like holding down a man and stuffing him to over filling till he cannot breathe again and banging his brains out!

        See how many times he calls to hook up after such an encounter!

        #IAmNotTalkingAboutMe

      • chestnut
        December 04, 06:31 Reply

        @Dennis: of course u’re not talking about u! Remember d man who deleted u after u “held him down and stuffed him to over-filling till he couldn’t breathe again,and banged him”? Hehehe …#ShadeOnThursday #TroubleMakerMode (should I come and make for you?)

        • pinkpanthertb
          December 04, 06:46 Reply

          Hahahahahahahahaa! My god, chestnut! That was an eclipse!

      • Dennis Macauley
        December 04, 06:36 Reply

        @chestnut
        **flips switch and turns on the lights before shade descends**

        Meanwhile it’s 1:0

        Na you start am oooo!

      • chestnut
        December 04, 06:47 Reply

        Lol,sowie nah dennis, na joke I dey joke o! Pls don’t shade me o!

      • gad
        December 04, 07:21 Reply

        Rely on his bank account? How will that give him sexual satisfaction? I just hope it’s not what I’m thinking that you are insinuating because for me there is nothing as cheap and disgusting as being with a guy because of material things

      • Khaleesi
        December 04, 08:21 Reply

        @Dennis,size doesnt really matter except you’re a size queen. Personally, i think big dick is nice to play with, suck etc, but not overly pleasant when u have to take it. Some of the best sex I’ve had has been with averagely endowed guys who know how to work it as well as how to push my buttons ….

  3. Kryss S
    December 04, 05:40 Reply

    “It’s not like a banana at all; it’s a little battery. All I can ever do is say, “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

    Eeyah! Pele! I understand how it feels! Going to a boarding school nd bathing in public would teach u that penis size does matter. Its not even like am as big as I want either or 4 my body size.
    Penile enlargement would do you good shaa or u come to Africa nd marry me, I don’t like stress or pain. I can manage u!

    OAN: “You’re either gay or you’re not; you can’t make yourself be gay.”.
    Just Hope Marv nd some ppl I know saw this oh!

  4. Kryss S
    December 04, 05:49 Reply

    Yes my dear! Size isn’t all that matter biko! Some ppl would just carry weapon of mass destruction inbetween their legs nd call it a penis! I can admire from a distance but u r so not coming near my pants! No money 4 pampers yet!
    Nd Dennis, not everyone wants to b a stuffed chicken!

  5. chestnut
    December 04, 06:01 Reply

    Poor guy! It must have made his life a bit more miserable. But I thought penile enlargement surgeries and pills and pumps and creams and oils etc,were in existence now? Adult-ware companies always claim they have those stuff (‘side-eye’ to “Zee Virtual Media”)

    “…u’re either gay or u’re not; u can’t make urself gay”…I hope all those who believe that being molested as a child or taking dicks up ur ass (even voluntarily,like this man) can change ur NATURAL orientation.

    • Dennis Macauley
      December 04, 06:04 Reply

      But there are people who “stumbled” into homosexual activity and remained! They were not gay, I know atleast two examples who did it in exchange for a favor and then realized that maybe it just wasn’t so bad!

      • chestnut
        December 04, 06:26 Reply

        @dennis,these two ppl were previously lusting after women, and then the attraction for women disappeared? Or they became bisexual? (Note: my previous comment refers to homosexuality, not bisexuality)

      • enigmous
        December 04, 06:36 Reply

        People like me. I was so naive that even after my inlaw drugged me & opened me up, I couldn’t tell what happened when I woke up (story for another day).

        To make matters worse, he kept begging and saying he was sorry when I woke up but I had no clue what he was talking about.

        I kept wondering what happened that he was pleading for until the next time he wanted to *know me* and he then explained what happened and how he feels about me.

        In the end, here am I. I wasn’t gay, I became one and, ain’t no stopping in the nearest future.

      • Dennis Macauley
        December 04, 06:40 Reply

        I know someone who wanted money for something, he was straight. He had an extra year at university and wanted to raise the fees himself without his folks knowing; this is someone we all knew.

        An offer was made to him, bend over and you get the money. He struggled with it, but when the deadline approached and he couldn’t raise the money, he gave in. He was banged thoroughly and the money given to him. After a few weeks he tried it again without any bait, he eventually started topping exclusively till this day!

        Let me also clarify that I had not part in that story!

      • chestnut
        December 04, 06:56 Reply

        I’m sorry, but I still find it hard to believe those type of ppl weren’t latent gays, suppressed by society and value-systems. Does it work the other way too? If u guys have sex with a woman, will u suddenly stop being attracted to guys FOREVER?

      • Khaleesi
        December 04, 08:27 Reply

        Am with you on this Chestie, a guy is either gay or bi or str8, a lot if bi guys actually dont realise that they are bisexual until they somehow stumble on it, they then assume that they were ‘converted’ …. methinks the more accurate term would be that they were ‘assisted’ in the discovery of their bisexual side – a side which is frequently unexplored due to our society’s homophobic restrictions … a truly straight guy CANNOT have sex with another man no matter how much he wants the money or whatever other inducement is placed on the table … my strong opinion sha …

      • Max
        December 04, 10:04 Reply

        Thanx KHallie and Chestnut.. A truly straight guy will die before he’ll let another man impale him..

    • s_sensei
      December 05, 20:08 Reply

      I find this interesting. If a guy is straight and refuses to have gay sex for any reason, he is truly straight…until he changes his mind. This “bisexual diagnosis” is one we make in retrospect. Summary: you can’t tell what a person’s sexual orientation really is until you can catch him at a 100 and review his entire sexual history. That’s if he will be honest. Sad part, you can declare him straight and then he has a one week gay relationship and then he dies. Hahaha

  6. Masked Man
    December 04, 06:14 Reply

    *laughing hysterically*
    I’ve seen tiny and I’ve seen extra extra extra large.
    When it’s tiny, you just look down nd wonder ‘how the hell did this shit happen’, (thanks Beyonce).
    But when it’s massive….*story for the gods*

  7. Queen Blue Fox
    December 04, 06:20 Reply

    Hahaha! abeg this size ain’t for me at all, I feel his pain and all, but sugar he ain’t coming near me with that.

  8. obatala
    December 04, 06:28 Reply

    kryss?
    u want to marry him out of pity?
    or you want green card
    and then you drop him like a bad habit

    • enigmous
      December 04, 06:38 Reply

      Loooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooool…drop him like a bad habit?

    • Kryss S
      December 04, 10:14 Reply

      Hian!!! Lemme get d green card first naa! We would definitely look @ some bad habits to drop after that *wink*!

  9. Handsomely Inclined
    December 04, 07:11 Reply

    Hmmmmmm….why do I strongly believe that no weapon of massive destruction can ever enter my temple of the lord?why?

    *munching my cucumber *

  10. Khaleesi
    December 04, 08:35 Reply

    Poor poor man! I wonder how thoroughly his micro-penis must have messed up his sex life … even as a bottom gay man, he would still probably have had lots of unfulfilling moments … a lot of tops i know also love to suck and play with big dicks, they just dont take it up their asses …

    • KingBey
      December 04, 09:21 Reply

      Thank you. Am one of them….. Am a Top and a guy with a big dick is a huge turn on for me….although most times am misunderstood…..

      • Regal Sweetheart
        December 04, 11:04 Reply

        Aha! KingBey. Identity confirmed.

        *going back to my daily activities*

  11. FKA Chizzie
    December 04, 09:20 Reply

    Lol this is so sad, for some reason, Dennis came to mind while I read this.

    • victor
      December 04, 10:21 Reply

      Oh my GOodlawd, why did u have to slay dennis lyk this @chizzie,hahahahahahahaha

      • enKayced
        December 04, 10:34 Reply

        I didn’t want to comment on this post but chizzie’s comment though!
        Eclipse of the solar system!!!

    • Dubem
      December 04, 11:07 Reply

      A subtle ask for Dennis’ dick, eh chizzie?

    • Metrosexual
      December 04, 11:28 Reply

      This slaying would give Buffy the Vampire Slayer a run for her money….. ROTFLMAO

  12. Max
    December 04, 09:49 Reply

    Bottom or top( damn I hate these labels), micro penis is disgusting as hell… Never seen one as small as described above though… But the small ones are just bad to look at or feel… Looks like a child’s own.. And I don’t do children..

      • Max
        December 04, 10:09 Reply

        Nna, I’m just being honest… Sorry dear writer, but you’re gonna keep having bad sex life till you die..
        Unless you find a girl with something more to be ashamed of..then maybe ya’ll can figure something out..
        Big cucumbers are a huge turn on… Just seeing it alone is enough.. Something just feels right about it .. ☺☺

  13. Airdeecan
    December 04, 10:36 Reply

    Much Ado about prick!!!, I could care less about size….

  14. enKayced
    December 04, 10:37 Reply

    I am perfectly bisexual, perfectly versatile and I don’t do young guys for any reason except one…
    If you’ve got a tool my size or bigger!
    Big dicks may not be fun to sit on but they are definitely fun to munch on. Helps when you are in a fulfilling, loving, honest relationship with the owner of the ‘Nepa’ pole!

  15. Masked Man
    December 04, 11:03 Reply

    Chizzie, hmm, you have silenced Dennis oh.
    He came to your mind when you were reding this? Aka m adiro ya oh!

  16. IVANKO
    December 04, 11:09 Reply

    Lmao Pinky u will nt kill me @ ur last comment ……….Micropenis gini.. God forbid bad thing, whr that one wan enter na.,,, lips sealed..

  17. Dennis Macauley
    December 04, 11:39 Reply

    Me and micro dick in the same sentence?

    LOL!

    Okay that actually cracked me up and made me spill something!

    Dubem was right tho! Just ask nicely, who knows Mrs M can even join in the show!

      • chestnut
        December 04, 13:48 Reply

        The day Dennis and Chizzie will find themselves behind closed doors ehn…*sips tea*…dat day no go soft at all…*adds more sugar*
        (This thing that I just said now…thank God for Escravos)

      • victor
        December 04, 15:54 Reply

        I can just imagine dennis meeting chizzie behind close door
        Dennis:you said my dick is a microdick,right?
        Chizzie:you can prove me wrong
        (Dennis brings out the dick while chizzie watches in anticipation)
        Chizzie: aren’t there more dick inside the pants?
        Dennis:have u seen anydick bigger than this bfor?
        (Chizzie giggles and rushes to kd to update on the pole while dennis rushes to him
        Dennis:how does my dick feel inside your ass?
        Chizzie:oh I didn’t know you’re inside of me
        (Dennis pounds with all his might while chizzie snores loudly). Lmao!

      • enKayced
        December 04, 18:55 Reply

        Victor, victor, Dear Victor!
        Anyway, the day Chizzie and Dennis will find themselves on top of themselves, whether behind closed doors or behind Mrs M’s wardrobe, it will be bloody!!!
        Chai *stirs tea*
        I need more creamer in this!

  18. Lanre Swagg
    December 04, 20:42 Reply

    There are 2 types of people. Gaigh, & Strayt. There are 2 types of Gaighs: Toms, & Bottops. There are 2 types of Bottops: Size Queens, and Size Queens. There are 2 types of Size Queens- those who are Out of the Size Closet, and Those Who are Still In The Size Closet.

    As the old saying goes, It’s Not the Size that Matters…It’s just Meters of Meat….

  19. s_sensei
    December 05, 20:12 Reply

    An average sized instrument attached to a kind heart and a smart brain. Too much to ask for?

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