THE UNEXPECTED SEX EDUCATION

THE UNEXPECTED SEX EDUCATION

The evening started with an unannounced visit from a man we’ll call Jacob, ugly, short-statured, with a massive kporo who I once dated. To be honest, I was a lot little in love with him. It’s also worthy of note that our relationship lasted a year, a year stricken with his guilt of a non-self-accepting gay man. He was religious and closeted, and it culminated into the reason we broke up.

But we stayed friends, every now and then coming together to reap some benefits.

And that day, he’d come for a beneficial visit. It was past 11 pm and I was going through an old post on Kito Diaries, the piece about the Senate’s rejection of the gender equality bill.

“That’s a sin, you know,” his voice came over my shoulder.

“What is?” I asked absently.

Stretching his thick frame out on my bed, he said with a shake of his head, “This notion that God was stupid when he made the woman a lower figure than the man. I mean, what’s with the whole gender equality noisemaking. The female gender will always be inferior.”

All my warrior instincts were called to the surface and I turned slowly to face him. “Eh?”

He sat up in bed. “I mean, really check this out. The bible clearly instructs a woman to be submissive to her husband and clearly states that she is an afterthought of creation. Why do we constantly challenge God? It’s the same thing with this gay activism craze.”

By this time, I was staring at him like I would stare at the psychiatrically-certified patient walking into my room.

He wasn’t done. “I mean, you know you’re considered an abomination and yet you flaunt your abnormality. It’s just not right.”

At this point, I glanced at the dish on the stool beside the bed upon which were remnants of the food I served him earlier, and I tried to recall if I’d added a soupcon of piss into it without knowing; because he had to be full of waste products to be vomiting this much bullshit.

“Why would you see that you’re born wrongly and not do anything to fix the loose nut in your system?” Jacob carried on, before shaking his head one last time and finishing off with, “Homosexuality really is a choice.”

Then I sat up fully and slowly fixed him with my Florence Ita Giwa look, an expression that preceded a hot contestation of ideals between us. For the next several hours, we were up all night, embroiled in a heated argument over the issue of the female gender’s disadvantagedness in the society; I wasn’t even going to tackle him on his internalized homophobic views on homosexuality. That issue had lasted the entire year of our relationship.

And then, I decided I had to teach him a lesson. It was past 4am and my hopes for sleep were gone. I was too wired by our talk to sleep. But we had exhausted our points, so there really was only one thing left to do. I began to strip, sensual, determined, a predatory expression on my face. I could tell I was exciting him as he began to shuck his trousers. His erection shot out, the much smaller replica of the olumo rock. When I reached for it, he sighed with anticipation. I bent over him and began to fellate him, pulling out all my skills to make this a memorable blowjob. And it must have been, because as my head bobbed and my tongue worked over his dick, my name became a lyrical chant from him.

Then I got up from blowing him, pushed him down to the bed, and soon, we got right down to business, with me on top, bouncing up and down on his dick. We were at this for several minutes, panting and racing for the top.

Then he got to the junction that I recognized. That point when you can ask a man with a dick inside you anything and he’d give it to you. He grabbed my ass and began pumping furiously upward. But I was not about that. I pushed him off and disengaged from him, breaking contact as I stood up amidst his whimpers. His sheathed dick was jerking as I got up from him, hard and angry and protesting the departure of my ass.

“What is wrong?” he panted. “What’s happening?”

“I’m making my choice of not being homosexual with you right now,” I said with a small, wicked smile. “Besides, if the deed isn’t completely done, you might stand a chance of forgiveness from your God.”

Then I sauntered out of the bedroom, leaving him looking like he had just sighted Joan Rivers without Botox.

Written by Kainene

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  1. raj
    July 04, 06:49 Reply

    Owk. First of ball,these internalised homophobic persons are sickening. Good thing I don’t and won’t deal.
    My major issue isn’t his negation of gender equality,I mean I am pro gender equality, but if you must choose a different stance, please make a reasonable point (may not justify but try)

    The guy is the reason most persons have low self esteem with people like him for friends . I know his psychological prognosis.
    “He would want to believe marriage is his cure,he would want to believe each time is his last,and eventually live a bitter life of hating what he loves” people like him don’t make good sex partners, say the least ;lovers.

    Like I said,a religious homophobic homosexual is worst thing to have around you. Others may hurt you,but when he who is suppose to understand doesn’t….. Like I said “worst thing to have around you”

    • ambivalentone
      July 04, 07:41 Reply

      A religious homophobic homosexual who is anti-gender equality IS the worst.

      • Mandy
        July 04, 08:40 Reply

        How can one be religious, internally homophobic and misogynistic, and still be able to function as a right thinking individual?
        Then again, Nigeria is full of such miracles.

  2. Dennis Macaulay
    July 04, 07:16 Reply

    Lol I swear I thought this was written by Pink Panther ???

    You have power Kainene, there are arguments I don’t have time for anymore, not in this my old age. Once you bring it up, I ask you to leave and we are done. Homophobic homosexuals are worse than vermin

    • Pink Panther
      July 04, 07:21 Reply

      I would not even deign to give him the satisfaction of sex all in the name of teaching him a lesson.

    • wahid
      July 04, 21:06 Reply

      I had to scroll down to confirm it wasn’t pinky.

      • KingBey
        July 05, 06:48 Reply

        PP doesn’t deal with big dicks. Get in #formation

    • KingBey
      July 05, 06:47 Reply

      You’re no longer a baby boy? ???

    • Kainene
      July 05, 10:08 Reply

      Believe meeee. The bastard had to be taught a lesson *blows on manicure*

  3. Queen Blue Fox
    July 04, 07:24 Reply

    Ok everyone has pointed out how much of an anu mpama the guy is, but damn why isn’t anyone talking about kainene’s wrath.
    *carries pom poms* woooooooo you go KAINENE, kainene for president!

  4. johnny
    July 04, 07:44 Reply

    I gave my bf the tutorial if his life when insulting a lesbian he was once in a pretence relationship with. He always paint the gal black when with me, I rebuked him told him he is not better. We are all queer!!!

  5. Mandy
    July 04, 07:44 Reply

    This Jacob’s reasoning is so flawed and despicable, he should be named Esau biko.

  6. ambivalentone
    July 04, 07:45 Reply

    Wait!!! I really don’t get. Some of y’all think like this and still find Max, Chuck and my argument about cheats annoying? I think there shud be a post about where we cross lines between political correctness and truth telling.

    • Mandy
      July 04, 08:38 Reply

      Perhaps you should write that post. You’ve been sounding off so much in the comments, I feel like your opinion should be archived on Kito Diaries.

      • ambivalentone
        July 04, 09:44 Reply

        Lol. Archive is good. It won’t change. Writing tho…coherence has not always being my strong suit. Too many emotions, too few letters.

  7. pete
    July 04, 09:01 Reply

    Bet this won’t be the last time Kainene will be making out with this guy.

      • pete
        July 04, 09:58 Reply

        From the story, Kainene has always known about his homophobic nature yet continued with him (his perogative though). KD is not a morality blog, so I’m not going to pontificate but there’s this this KD standard of saying one thing on this blog & doing the opposite in real life, yet holding people to the same standards you don’t uphold.

        • Delle
          July 04, 10:42 Reply

          I just don’t see the necessity in pointing that out, IMO.

          • pete
            July 04, 11:27 Reply

            Read your comment below & let me know if you don’t see the necessity.

            • Delle
              July 04, 12:07 Reply

              It depends. Were you pointing that out in a “I seriously hope Kainene would see the light this time” or were u just being judgemental. The latter is what it seemed to be though.

          • ambivalentone
            July 04, 12:43 Reply

            loool But he has to na. If he doesn’t, all ‘attacks’ are moot and one ‘sin’ is no more than the other. Perhaps it isn’t and I sympathize, Pete darling, but I am more amused.

    • KingBey
      July 05, 06:51 Reply

      There is a big dick involved here. Did you miss that part? ???

  8. Delle
    July 04, 09:27 Reply

    I don’t know how one human being, like Mandy said, would possess such demonic (yes, demonic) characteristics and still be allowed to breathe. I just don’t know.
    I can’t deal. You truly believe, in that tiny brain of yours, that being gay (which you consider an abomination) is a choice and you decided to make the choice of being with a guy at that moment? A guy you plan on having sex with. A guy you’ve always been having sex with. Doesn’t that show just how much of a dunce you are?
    The description of the man says ‘ugly, short’, it’s pitiful that ‘daft’ would be added to such awful resumee.

  9. Chizzie
    July 04, 14:59 Reply

    Wait wait wait. I thought Kainene was a girl. Like a lesbian girl.
    ?

    • Pjay
      July 05, 00:55 Reply

      Me too. Imagine my shock when I learnt she’s male.

  10. KingBey
    July 05, 06:53 Reply

    Things people have to endure when a big dick is involved. ???

  11. Orobohunter
    July 05, 12:57 Reply

    “..His erection shot out, the much smaller replica of the olumo rock…” This killed me. Nice one.

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