I meet Julius in October 2011. Before that meet, we had been online friends, chatting via 2go. He’d wanted to meet on several occasions, but I’d declined. Something about his photo didn’t sit well with me. It didn’t help that he resided in one of the most notorious ghettos in Enugu. So I kept saying no to his requests for me to visit. Not because I feared a kito experience, far from it. I simply didn’t like the Julius I could see in his profile picture.

But the guy wouldn’t give up.

“Come to my house nah,” he’d say.

“No, I don’t have chance,” I’d reply.

“Ok. Can I visit you?”

“No, you can’t. I stay with my uncle and I’m not allowed visitors.”

“Ok, let’s see in a joint of your choice.”

At this point, I’d take another look at his display photo and feel repulsed again.

“Sorry, no chance,” I’d demur.

And then the day came when he informed me in a chat that he would be traveling to Port Harcourt to see his parents. While he was in PH, he changed his display photo to a pic where he was clad in boxers and a white singlet. Here, he looked much better; nothing that would turn heads in the street, but he was not bad either. (Later, I got to know that that initial picture was an old photo, in no way close to what he looked like presently).

As I stared at his new display picture, I began to feel a slight tug of attraction for him. When he returned to Enugu, I started throwing very subtle hints at him about meeting, but the hints were so subtle that they bounced off him. I didn’t blame him though, given the level of rejection I’d subjected him to.

He did however eventually ask me again himself, for a meet. This time, I said yes. He’d asked in the morning as I got ready for school. I asked him to come over to my campus. All these conversations were still via 2go. We’d never exchanged numbers, not even now that we were finally scheduled to meet. When I got to the campus, my network developed a problem, and I logged off 2go, making a mental note of logging back in soon. However, I got so distracted with my course mates, I forgot to log back online.

In the evening, after I got home, I logged into my account and saw his name in the list of online friends. Suddenly, I remembered our proposed meet. I felt really bad. I apologized and promised to come around his place on my way to school the next day. He graciously accepted my apology, and the following morning, I set off for his residence.

After that first face-to-face meet, I found myself actually liking him. I found myself wanting more of him. So I pushed for it, and we soon began dating, a relationship that went on to last for about a year and a half.

In May 2013, one day, I went to see Julius at his place. We were together, doing stuff that boyfriends do. It was a great day. In the evening, I went back home. Immediately I stepped into my uncle’s compound, my phone rang. It was him, my boyfriend, Julius. He wanted to know if I’d gotten home safely. We cooed at each other on the phone for awhile before we disconnected. That call was going to be the last time I’d hear from or speak to Julius in a very long time.

I tried calling him severally after that evening, but he didn’t pick any of my calls. At some point, the line stopped being available. I went to see him but he wasn’t home. I was suddenly so swiftly cut off from him that my head spun for awhile. I hurt some, and then I moved on, trying not to feel too much hurt at the closure I wasn’t to get at the end of our relationship.

A year and seven months passed and suddenly, he was reconnecting with me via whatsapp. He’d apparently gotten my number from a mutual friend of ours. And he had news: he was now a pastor. He was full of the gospel. I didn’t mind that he’d found salvation, but I quickly jettisoned him from my chat list when he started pestering me with religious broadcast messages.

Thus ensued another period of radio silence between us. Two years passed, and a few weeks ago, he showed up at my house.

“What are you doing here, Julius?” I wanted to know.

“I came to see your face and also to know how you’re doing,” he said.

“After like what, three years? Well, I’m fine.” After a brief moment of silence, one richly marinated with awkwardness, I asked, “Is there any other thing?”

“Yes there is,” he said solemnly. “I also came to ask for your forgiveness.”

“Forgiveness for what?”

“For everything.”

“What is the everything I’m supposed to forgive?”

“Staying away from you.”

“Why did you do that? Why did you stay away from me?”

He didn’t reply.

I sighed. “You know, I’ve thought about this day severally. I’ve thought, and finally, I came to terms with the decision that should you ever ask, I’ll forgive you. So there, you’re forgiven.”

“Thank you,” he said. After a beat, he added, “There is something else.”

“What is it?”

“I want you back.”

“Huh?” I raised my brows in astonishment.

“I want us to be friends again.”

“Why?” I asked.

This prompted him to go on a rambling speech about all the reasons he’d like to have me back as his boyfriend. I let him go on, choosing not to bring up the bit about his salvation of a couple of years ago.

Finally, I cut him short with my firm words, “I don’t like you the way I used to. We can be friends, sure. Just to be clear, we are never getting back together.”

Written by Michael

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  1. ambivalentone
    September 08, 07:29 Reply

    Well, I’m not sure it’d av worked anyways. When he has another ‘I see heaven’ moment, you’d be left high and dry and pained all over

  2. miztadiol
    September 08, 07:34 Reply

    Awwww.. The answer tho. Ahan!.. You can’t leave and feel like you can come back at any time. Move niggi, have moved the hell on! Do same.

  3. Mandy
    September 08, 07:56 Reply

    Taylor Swift would be so proud of you. 😀

    • Kenny
      September 08, 09:55 Reply

      I swear as I read the last sentence, the song started playing in my head ?.

  4. Jo
    September 08, 08:34 Reply

    It is better to save yourself the headache joor…This one is a major case. sometime in the future he may have a Jesus moment again and then the cycle would start again sha.

  5. Khaleesi
    September 08, 09:18 Reply

    Mike you took the best decision ever, such guys belong in an obscure part of the friends zone – a part where it’ll make little or no difference if you see them or not ever again. Such men can’t be relied on, when next he’s in a heavenly mood you’ll be cast out into the dark to writhe in pain and agony …

  6. Enugu Guy
    September 08, 10:46 Reply

    Enugu men …… Hmmmm
    I thought I was alone with this type of experience

  7. Fresh
    September 08, 21:36 Reply

    The last sentence got me smiling. Nigga pls move on to avoid brain cancer from Julius. This subtitle men in paradise can ruin your orgasm. Ohh spread tho! Legs let’s walk in air.

  8. Tangie Bloom
    May 01, 16:29 Reply

    I need to learn to do that. Say no I don’t want you back. Sometimes I’m nice to my own detriment.

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