The Fantastic Opinion About Sexualities, Bisexuality and Bestiality
Very recently, I was interviewed and in the course of the interview, I shed some light on my ideals, speaking on causes I support like feminism and gay activism. The interview was mainstream and garnered some reads. Expectedly, a number of friends sought me out privately to discuss aspects of the interview, majorly where it concerned my feminist views and LGBT standpoint.
Amongst these people was a Facebook acquaintance. This guy (who I’ll refer to as HIM) had engaged me in the past in rousing conversations centering on Feminism and Gender Equality. So when he came around, I had no idea what he was going to take on.
That soon became startlingly clear to me. Check on our chat below and sound off your opinions in the comments section:
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20 Comments
Absalom
September 12, 06:50Poor guy.
You addressed many of his questions but it seems there’s one you didn’t quite touch on and that’s the one I’m interested in: his earlier analogy about the two homosexual boys – the one a “charade” and the other authentic.
He is trying his best to make sense of homosexuality and the only way he can do this is to engage in some (fallacious) rationalizations: you are only acceptable as gay if you can present some kind of…genetic evidence to prove it, otherwise what are you doing in the Rainbow Camp?
I hear people pull this same stunt with effeminacy – drawing a distinction between who is “naturally effeminate” and who is only faking it, in order to decide which camp (pun intended) deserves to not be ridiculed.
And yet, we don’t hear about who is born “naturally masculine” as against who is faking it.
Just as I’m pretty certain Mr. Him doesn’t raise questions about who is “naturally straight” or who is faking their straight. In fact, he probably wouldn’t mind us “becoming unnaturally heterosexual”, because that (like masc looks) is considered the standard, and everything else the, uh, comma. Ask him!. 🙂
Sha, tell him he doesn’t need to make excuses for gayness. How the gay got gay is not as important as how the gay gets treated or – as with the Nigerian case – mistreated.
And as Bisi Alimi said when faced with a similar question last week, Mr. Him should ask himself instead “Why do you hate?” https://hdp.press/my-long-essay-to-what-is-your-rationale-for-being-gay-4d361923a5f7?source=facebookShare-c067bdfb1824-1473497938
At least the guy didn’t say we are gay for the money – phew! Guess it was our lucky day.
Pink Panther
September 12, 07:13Yea, that beginning part about homosexuality, I was going to answer that, but he kept on butting in, until he got to the part about bestiality and my incredulity basically wiped my intention to answer those earlier questions out of my mind.
ambivalentone
September 12, 06:59Studies have shown that sex with animals can be consensual??? I’d like to see how and when o.
His views about the ‘same-sex’ schools were particularly flawed. Gay people obviously go to mixed schools where heterosexuality and all its workings are mainstream and still turn out peculiarly gay at puberty. How does that happen? All that living in the boys dorm warped their thinking still? While it is understandable that where testosterone peaks, nature probably induces lower production of the hormone in one individual, until he becomes the bitch (and vice versa for d ladies), I have only read about that in fish. But as evidenced in prisons-themed movies and stuff, who’s to say it don’t really happen?
For me, the jury is still out on bisexuality, especially in a homophobic country like ours. I take the professions of a ‘bisexual’ hardly worth a pinch of salt and I recently have taken to asking if they are conditional bisexuals or actual bisexuals. Conditional in the case where u can’t afford to be truly gay in Nigeria and need to think cos YOU HAVE TO get it up for girls in this insane place, u r bisexual.
Was it only me who found ur incredulity particularly patronising if you claim u had had intellectual discourses with HIM previously? If the intent (his) was not to genuinely convince u of ur percieved wrong, I’d have referred u to each lengthy write or totally ignored u.
Pink Panther
September 12, 07:11I don’t understand this: ‘For me, the jury is still out on bisexuality…’? Never mind about our homophobic country.
ambivalentone
September 12, 07:46And it is exactly because of the homophobia here that I can’t acknowledge the Nigerian brand of bisexuality.
keredim
September 12, 17:51Fair point
Canis VY Majoris
September 12, 07:07LOL @ LG Community. Is it the Tech Company?
This is very funny, someone would rather acknowledge Bestiality over Bisexuality…our fellow coin tossers have suffered sha.
Girl James
September 12, 09:44Lmao, very funny comment
Mandeville
September 12, 13:33Just an observation, and I guess it was in complete exasperation with his arguments, Pinky, you actually let the cat out of the bag by mentioning said person’s name in one area of your comments in the sexuality 101 lecture. And while I may not condone bestiality of any sort, humans have found a way to trick animals into giving consent especially if the said animal is on the top bunk of the sexual activity (emphasis on the word trick).
With regards to the first statement Mr. Him made (deliberately avoiding naming names), sexual experimentation during puberty and adolescence doesn’t lead to conditioned sexuality. Being gay isn’t all about the act of sex just like being straight isn’t. Just like being bisexual doesn’t mean because you can get it up for both sexes you’d be classed as such. Everyone knows that there can be a time when the brain takes residence in the lower recesses of the body no matter whom it is. Sexuality is fluid. And just like the electromagnetic spectrum, there are several spectra of sexualities. Some of us are Kinsey VI gay, others are in different sexual bands. The fact that our dear hateful (pardon the language) country decides to limit such expressions does not make them nonexistent. The fact that sex is used to determine sexuality doesn’t imply that it’s the in all and be all of sexual orientations. When we as gay men start closing our minds to the possibilities that there are sexualities between the two shades of straight or gay, then we are no different from the homophobes we so criticise. The sexual bigotry we seem to exhibit on here for those that, who because of societal pressures or something, decide to appear as something they wouldn’t, in ideal circumstances, be is saddening and appalling. Different strokes for different folks. MGM, MBM, MSM; whatever it is, once you’re secure in your own sexuality, doing what is right by you should be your own priority. If you decide to take the path well worn, fine. If the path untrodden is what you’re taking, great. Your story and someone else’s will never be the same. Carve out yours and let it be the beacon that you are happy with.
Pink Panther
September 12, 15:21‘And while I may not condone bestiality of any sort, humans have found a way to trick animals into giving consent…’
That is still not consensual.
Mandeville
September 12, 17:26Would you say a dog or horse pumping a man or woman has no idea it’s not having sex?
IBK
September 13, 09:40Would you say a person laying there being pumped away at doesn’t know she’s having sex.
Mandy
September 13, 13:16Good one, IBK. Awareness doesn’t automatically translate to consent.
Mandeville
September 14, 11:42Please note that I said it wasn’t condoned and there were emphasis on the word ‘trick’ and phrase ‘top bunk’. Humans can sometimes be in control of their base urges but animals are ruled by those urges.
wondabuoy
September 12, 20:03I’m trying to really understand the difference between pan-sexuality and bisexuality.
Pjay
September 12, 21:19Bisexual is bi – two ways. Same sex or opposite sex. Pansexual is more open. Like a pan. Lol. A Pansexual doesn’t think in terms of two sexes, male or female. When you’re Pansexual, anything goes. Male, female, transgender, agender, asexual. As the subject of your attractions of course.
wondabuoy
September 13, 09:19I know that bisexuals are attracted to both males or females; If anything goes for a pan-sexual, and we have only male or female sex, doesn’t that mean that bisexuality is same as pan-sexuality.
Lord Naughtiness
September 13, 02:01One woof for yes and two for no……..
This got me cracking… Well what do I think of bestuality, since u can never really tell if the animal wants it then i think u are raping the animal….. And yes bisexual is thing… I must admit, I never knew there were so much sexuality…
Pansexual be looking awesome…. Is it to late to change sexuality ???
Kerr
September 13, 04:57Mutual Bestial Relationships….
I had “insta-headache ” when I saw that.
For heavens sakes, animals don’t talk (well, unless you can speak goat), so how is it mutual?
George
September 09, 09:11I believe that U saying that beastiality is not a sexual orientation makes u ‘beastial-phobic’, whatever that means. I guess u never really know how it feels to be gay, bi, trans or ‘beastial’ until u really are.