The #MetGala Story We Wish Hollywood Would Tell

So you remember that time when Twitter generated the possible motion picture storyline starring Rihanna and Lupita Nyong’o? Well, Twitter is sure starting to take this movie pitching career seriously.

While most of the Catholic world is spouting butthurt indignation about cultural appropriation over the Met Gala’s 2018 theme, Heavenly Bodies: Fashion and the Catholic Imagination, Twitter is busy spawning fantastic ideas for a potential blockbuster.

Twitter user, Karen Mireles with handle @merielTLA not only gives an outline of a fantasy kingdom – aptly named the Met Kingdom – that promises a possible cinematorgasm, she establishes her idea of a movie as a feminist powerhouse by liberally sprinkling it with very powerful female leads. There is a grieving Queen Mother whose son, the king has just died, and who plots to take out her daughter-in-law, the Queen Regent. There are three powerful princesses, scheming sisters to the Queen, rival queens from other kingdoms, and representatives of otherworldly bodies like priestesses and oracles. There is even more than a hint of a gay and lesbian storyline added for effect.

As I went through the Twitter thread, I was getting a strong Snow White and the Huntsman/Thor/Prince of Persia vibes.

But hey, let me not take away the fun from you. Below is the rundown of the thread of a film Hollywood just must do.

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Karen Mireles @merielTLA May 7

So this #MetGala theme has me thinking of fantasy kingdoms. The Met Kingdom – where you have the widowed Queen Mother #Madonna, mourning the death of her beloved son and plotting to remove the Queen Regent from her throne.

Karen Mireles @merielTLA

The Queen Regent. A strong-willed ruler, that sees for the rise of her kingdom and the happiness of her daughters. #BlakeLively #MetGala

Karen Mireles @merielTLA

The Crowned Princess. Skilled in politics and kind to her people. She might be subdued compared to her sisters, but don’t mistake that for weakness. #KatherineLangford #MetGala

Karen Mireles @merielTLA

The Guardian Princess. Second to the throne and head chief of the Queen’s army. She is as beautiful as she is deadly; her sharp mind and sword are respected through all kingdoms. #Zendaya #MetGala

Karen Mireles @merielTLA

The Earth’s Princess. Although she is the youngest, she is a fierce protector of her kingdom and all its resources. She has learned the art of Earth Witchcraft, where she can manipulate nature at her will. #ArianaGrande #MetGala

Karen Mireles @merielTLA

The high priests. Both advisors to the queen, even if some say that one might be a little more than that. But which one? Yes, that is the question. #Rihanna #ChadwickBoseman #MetGala

Karen Mireles @merielTLA

The Late King. A kind soul forced to rule after the death of his big brother, he was passionate of the arts and his male servants. He married his childhood friend, knowing that she would help him with the burden of the kingdom and that she would not be bothered by the act of a cover as long as he could give the kingdom at least one legitimate child and would be a loving father to the others. #DarrenCriss #MetGala

Karen Mireles @merielTLA

The High Nun and the Death Nun. Both highly powerful in the religion, followers of the great Goddess and ruthless in their faith #EizaGonzalez #LilyCollins #MetGala

Karen Mireles @merielTLA

The Queen’s Sisters and advisors. Powerful women that might have their own interests at heart. #EmiliaClarke #NicoleKidman #RosieHuntington #MetGala

Karen Mireles @merielTLA

The Princess Ladies. Companions to the Crowned Princess and Earth Princess. #PriyankaChopra #BellaHadid #MetGala

Karen Mireles @merielTLA

The Rival. Crowned Princess of the rival kingdom. She portrays a sweet and relaxed persona that hides an unhealthy thirst for blood and power. She is a hidden blood witch. #AmandaSeyfried #MetGala

Karen Mireles @merielTLA

The Entities. One for Heaven #KatyPerry, One for Hell #NickiMinaj, One for Death #CaraDelevingne #MetGala

Karen Mireles @merielTLA

The Gods Triad…because every good fantasy story has gods meddling in the affairs of the world. #MetGala

Karen Mireles @merielTLA

So yeah…give me this movie! #MetGala #MetGala2018

Well, would you watch this movie if it ever got made?