THE OUTREACH THAT IS KITO DIARIES

THE OUTREACH THAT IS KITO DIARIES

I remember some time several months ago, during an idle conversation with Pink Panther, when he shared that one of the reasons he hadn’t wanted to embark on the operation of an LGBT blog was that he didn’t know any platform he could use to publicize the presence of Kito Diaries to those concerned. He was closeted, so of course he couldn’t use any of his social media accounts to share links to updates on the blog. When I asked him how he was able to fix the issue of publicity after the blog became operational, he replied, “I didn’t have to. It took care of itself.”

And that didn’t surprise me. Kito Diaries came at a time when we most needed it – a platform to express ourselves in a period when we were required to stay silent.

The knowledge of the understated yet vast outreach of Kito Diaries was reinforced in my mind recently. It was a Monday, and as it was with me on Mondays, I was at the bank to do some bank runs. I had my ear phones plugged into my ears, which connected me to the blasting tunes of Tecno’s ‘Pana’. I was reading a story on KD on my phone, while I stood waiting for the electromagnetic door to open so I could get inside the bank.

Then I felt someone tap my shoulder. I looked up and turned to see one of the security men saying something to me. I unplugged the ear piece and he repeated what he’d earlier said.

“Is that Kito Diaries you’re reading?”

I don’t know what startled me more – the fact that someone had caught me indulging my guilty pleasure of reading KD, or the fact that a security man knew about Kito Diaries (I don’t mean to sound elitist here). I was so taken aback that I didn’t even reply him before practically fleeing into the banking hall. (I guess the unique pink colour of the site was a giveaway)

Inside the hall, I buzzed PP to tell him about what had happened, and the story whore that he is, he laughed and basically ordered me to finish my business in the bank, go out, find the security man and engage him.

Engage him for what kwanu? I wanted to know.

Who knows, he might have a story to tell, the story whore replied.

I shook my head and laughed, unsure whether I wanted to further any acquaintanceship with the man. The decision however was taken away from me, because when I stepped out of the bank to leave, he wasn’t anywhere in sight.

So I went on home with the realization that Kito Diaries is full of faceless, voiceless people reading it and taking away from it what they will.

I have a question for you though, dear KDian: Have you told someone about Kito Diaries today? Let us spread the word.

Written by Pete

Previous Deola’s Corner: Another Week Of TV (Edition 24)
Next Craig David Isn’t Bothered By Gay Rumours

About author

You might also like

Our Stories 27 Comments

THE BURDEN OF MY PAIN

Heartbreak. It’s not at all a good feeling. It is one of those dark places you fall into and eventually emerge, either made or marred. Many people will say to

Our Stories 9 Comments

THE DEMONS OF LAGOS

The stories of the queer men in Lagos came to me via social media, but more specifically Kito Diaries. I recall reading stories here in my room many miles away

Our Stories 0 Comments

My Life In Tweets

Dear KDians, A Call For Entries was made about a month ago by the 14 team for works that tell the stories of LGBT Nigerians. The response so far has

51 Comments

  1. Francis
    October 04, 05:47 Reply

    ???? I’m always scared of this happening sometimes especially when salacious pics are attached to the article

    • Keredim
      October 04, 06:39 Reply

      You know what that is, right?
      ??????????????

  2. Mandy
    October 04, 06:29 Reply

    ????????
    This is hilarious, especially the way you said you fled into the bank.
    Nawa to you o. As an ambassador for Kito Diaries, shame on you, Pete. 😀

    • pete
      October 04, 06:33 Reply

      Wasn’t expecting the question. I’ve to flee to gather my thoughts ??

  3. SillyAnonymous
    October 04, 07:08 Reply

    When I’m in public sometimes, I whip out the kitodiaries and wait for someone to ask.
    HashtagSimplyUnlucky

  4. Law
    October 04, 07:41 Reply

    Oh… I have also met someone this same way at d palms. He saw me reading a story from the blog as I queued to get a movie ticket… And U know I was laughing from an argument going on on d blog. Someone tapped my shoulder from behind. He said “Dont U jst love the daily drama going on this site. ” I was startled. He introduced himself and we became friends. He has still nt dropped a comment here but he is a frequent reader…… Thanks PP for this platform.

  5. Dennis Macaulay
    October 04, 07:57 Reply

    There was a day I used Dennis Macaulay to check into a hotel; its obviously not my legal name but Dennis is my middle name and Macaulay is my dad’s name so technically it is my name. I use it for online shopping, give it to sales canvassers and generally for anything I don’t like leading back to me.

    Anyway when I gave it to this guy who worked the desk at the hotel as my name he smiled and said “In the flesh” ???! I was mortified I swear. We are good friends now anyway.

    There was also that time I used it at the British council to meet a rep from a UK university which was canvassing for MBA students ??? Baba was an avid KDian and serious follower of my column. We sha later went out a few times!

    There are many people who lurk on this site and read everything without writing a comment ???

    • esv.jay
      October 04, 13:01 Reply

      yea ofcourse everything that happens here somehow has a way it relates with your life.

  6. Frank_Einstein
    October 04, 08:34 Reply

    This is one site I visit everyday. I rarely comment though; but I love the work you guys do here. Thank you for lifting my spirit everyday. And thanks to all those who make the comments section exciting.

  7. ambivalentone
    October 04, 08:47 Reply

    There is some happiness gained reading experiences like these. I have not experienced these personal testimonies that y’all av but it has been my business that every gay guy I interact with knows about this site…and some not-gay guys. The addiction for the site has caused me to open tabs on strangers’ phones those days my data is exhausted. My public outing is very imminent????

  8. Viera
    October 04, 08:49 Reply

    IBK introduced US to KD
    And till tomorrow
    I’m not sure he knows who this is……….

    • IBK
      October 04, 10:01 Reply

      I have a fair idea of who to ask to confirm.

  9. Peak
    October 04, 09:11 Reply

    I was dragged kicking and screaming to a gay party somewhere on the Island on Friday. Sometime during the celebration, the MC threw the floor open and gave a time slot of 45 minutes dedicated to discussing “issues affecting us as a community”. I was quite surprised because I have never heard of anything of this nature happening at such gatherings.
    Issues from effeminacy and it’s challenges, preferences, MGM and bisexuality and discrimination against trans people (a lot of gay men seriously have issues with trans people. Someone said he doesnt get it and isnt bother about their issues cos it JUST DOESN’T MAKE SENSE) were severely discussed. Just as I suspected, a lot of these guys read KD, because the usual KD vocabularies like IH, MGM and many phobia associated with the community, were being tossed around in accusations and counter accusations. What was more important, was the fact that these men where able to share their views with utmost civility regardless of how disparaging some of these views were.
    At least 6 men who were either close to their 30s or over 30, vehemently expressed their decision not to bow to societal pressures of getting married. There were no (serious) animosity over the subject of bisexuality or MGMs, (there were a good number of them that HATE MGMs, but rather not acknowledge their existence than get involved or riled up over their matter).
    When I was opportuned to have a private interaction with the MC, I asked a few question to put my mind at ease. Yes, he does read KD and the decision to ask us to talk about our community had something to with a post on KD that highlighted the fact that we are more focused on having “fun” with little thought to discussing issues affecting us as a unit. In addition, he pointed out that the discussion actually caused some of the guest who were “forming” initially to contribute and become more engaging.
    By daybreak, the initial inhibition had ebbed and interaction flowed freely, a lot of people admitted to reading the blog and always found a way of tying it to the admin by saying “is it not that PP’s blog?”.

    Sometimes the comment section my appear exhausting and repetitive, but it was really really rewarding to know that we are all shaping minds and driving discussion with our incessant debates. The throat slitting and eye clawing may be appear a little gory sometimes, but it was indeed an eye opening experience to see that such darkness and ugliness can yield warm and positive outcomes.

    • ambivalentone
      October 04, 10:37 Reply

      Ehen!!! So ppl can hate something and not be bothered or riled up about their existences? Our lives as LGBTs wud be so much easier if these guys wud teach homophobes a thing or two about hating o??

    • Chandler B.
      October 04, 17:02 Reply

      Wow! Nice. We are growing as a community.

      Again, thank you Pinkie. Really. The blog is bigger than us all.
      ?????

  10. Olusola A.
    October 04, 09:11 Reply

    My first acquaintance on grindr directed me here.

    Funny though.

  11. Delle
    October 04, 09:36 Reply

    This has never happened to me shaa (I guess that’s cos I do not read KD in public not with some of the very incriminating theme pictures), but it’s a wonderful development. Every one is reading. From every work of life. The rich, middle class and the struggling.
    Finally, a voice for us. It’s comforting somewhat.

    It’s pertinent to note that KD has by FAR more readers than commenters.

  12. Wiffey
    October 04, 11:26 Reply

    They was this rude bitch in my screen writing class last year who was always giving everyone an attitude especially his roommates. It didn’t take long for my gadar to spot him but I kept my suspicion to myself.
    Then one day when we were out for lunch and on a queue, I turned around and some how saw the screen of his iPhone… There it was, The KD article of the day.
    KD identifying TBs since 1879..

    • Edo
      October 04, 11:41 Reply

      I always feel like guys that are bitchy are gay. sorry if am stereotyping.

      • Delle
        October 04, 12:40 Reply

        This word ‘bitchy’ due to the contexts it’s been used in confuses me. Do you mean bitchy as in ‘feminine’ or ‘attitudinal?’
        #askingformyself

    • Pink Panther
      October 04, 12:56 Reply

      ?????

      Why didn’t you then go over to introduce yourself as a fellow KDian to him?

  13. Edo
    October 04, 11:32 Reply

    remove the restriction on the comment to make it more interesting again jare. Mr Pp what’s your mail addy? I have questions for you.

  14. Bain
    October 04, 11:59 Reply

    funny story: A guy texted me on WhatsApp dah he knows am gay….I was like “yea n so?…Hw did you find out?”…. he said he saw me on kd….I was ehem nna wah wer u doin der in d first place….blahblah long story short we r naw fwb’s.

  15. YOU-KNOW-WHO
    October 04, 12:30 Reply

    Even for some us that were banned.. we still come once in a while to check out how things are faring on KD.. even if we can’t comment with our TRUTH (Opps sorry) True identity.

    It’s a fun place to learn and interact.

    • Delle
      October 04, 12:41 Reply

      Oooh! It’s Tef!
      Honey, come out already. *every pun overly intended*

      • esv.jay
        October 04, 13:06 Reply

        you just have a way of poking your nose everywhere just cos of the few insipid articles you have written here.

        • Francis
          October 04, 13:27 Reply

          Oshe! DM has a new “fan” ???

  16. Queen Blue Fox
    October 04, 12:49 Reply

    I’ll just make it a send a message to the man of your dreams who you don’t know if he reads KD or not day. Erm.. Ok My favorite Soldier and Sit mate, I told you I really like you and you replied who wouldn’t like the mighy…….. I am still waiting o. come make me honest or amma come kidnap you. ? ok I’ve passed my message. *struts off*

  17. esv.jay
    October 04, 13:08 Reply

    I think PP deserves an award as much as he can be annoying at times he is a true hero for providing this platform. I hope I get to meet him one day and give him a BIG hug!

  18. BlurryFace
    October 04, 13:25 Reply

    true that all. Now please does anyone have any idea where I can get the movie Front Cover? No torrent available on it yet though.

  19. MagDiva
    October 04, 13:25 Reply

    I found KD from reading an article by Kenny Badmus on BN sometime last year. If I’m honest, it was more curiosity than anything else (and I hope I don’t offend) but I wanted to see how gay Nigerians were, understand the struggles, challenges and battles faced daily.

    This place has been an eye opener, it has made me even more empathetic, tolerant and a bit of a Dennis Macaulay (LGBTI activist).

    I’ve shared this with a friend who is a writer to educate her (as she used to think this was a “lifestyle choice”) and she recently told me she shared it with another friend who is in Nigeria struggling with her sexuality.

    So thank you PP and everyone else on here who contributes positively in educating folks out there and also sharing your stories, keeping it real and telling your narrative.

    If there’s anything I can do to help on this journey xx

  20. Jacques Dubois
    October 04, 15:22 Reply

    This platform truly came at a time when it was needed…… Let’s keep doing the good work and educating people, we’ll make a change eventually.

  21. Edo
    October 04, 15:39 Reply

    I also found out in a similar fashion. I was in a sneaky mood on that day and I remember well the first story I read made me quite shocked! but I kept on reading (I like the non fiction ones without explicit details) incognito mode bcos if my madam catches me na die.
    All in all it has made me more understanding in my head to lgbt folks. I have 3 friends that have told me about their “struggle”. For one of them it’s particularly tough bcos he got married and his wife found out and now all his family and her family knows his past. They are now separated.
    I also relate with these guys outside their sexuality bcos there’s more about them that that. That’s why I think DM’s rant should exclude the “gay” word.(Mr DM I am also strongly opinionated ?). Keep in mind that I do not also agree with everything they do.
    Anyway, y’all keep entertaining us and keep safe, away from STIs. I salute everyone living their truth and weathering storms.

  22. Di-Navy
    October 04, 17:37 Reply

    I think I have heard about kito diaries since 2014 but I was always carried away with “my mind snaps” by PP so I paid no mind to KD till my partner introduced me here earlier this year and I’m like ” oh my, is this what this blog is all about “. ThankGod I’m home now.

  23. johnny
    October 04, 19:40 Reply

    OK. Daddy is here.
    I found out about KD while surfing abt “Nigeria gays”. Thanks to Google who gave KD as one of the hit.
    But I haven’t told bae about this place because of my comments. I don’t want to scatter my house with my hand. Bae myt be here tho.

  24. Kennedy
    October 04, 19:55 Reply

    … Nice Blog!! Miss Truth and his annoying world tho; can sum1 “unban” him… And even reverse him back to MAX biko…

  25. DarkSide
    October 04, 21:25 Reply

    Whew! For once, AGREEMENT. And appreciation. Now isn’t this fun?

  26. pagxy
    October 05, 03:26 Reply

    Pls unban max where is chizzie we want this place to be on fire.

    • posh6666
      October 05, 09:06 Reply

      Lool I don’t think Chizzie wants to be associated with the negativity any longer.He has finally found his happiness selling his little phone cases.

      • Francis
        October 05, 09:08 Reply

        Yes oh. Before ndi KD will carry his matter to twirrer and spoil his market ??????

        • posh666
          October 05, 09:14 Reply

          Hahahahaha trust me some people will love to do that.But we are all becoming better people so no need to knock down a fellow sisters hustle.

  27. michael
    October 05, 16:28 Reply

    How I stumbled to this site is still a mystery for me.

  28. michael
    October 05, 16:40 Reply

    Where is facada? Ain’t you going to say something?

Leave a Reply