TRANSAMERICA

TRANSAMERICA

The first time I had sex with a person of the same sex, it wasn’t anything like I thought it’d be. There was no shit, no blood. I found myself marveling at how the elasticity of the ass to take dick cannot be paralleled. It happened with my best friend’s brother, his immediate older brother. He came over to play PlayStation with me. Then PHCN, as they were called back then, took the light. Some boys were playing soccer in a compound a few blocks from my house. I thought he’d want to go join them, but he didn’t. I didn’t want to join them either. So, we relaxed in my room, and soon started talking about penis lengths and girth. Predictably, one thing led to the other, and a kiss later, I was banging him. We were teenagers, him 15 and me 14.

But this story isn’t about my first time with the same sex. Well, it’s about a first time of sorts.

A few years ago, I relocated out of Nigeria, to a predominantly white state in the US. The first time I had sex there was with a transgender man. FTM, they are called. Female to Male. I am bisexual, attracted to men my age or younger, and to women older than me. (There’s a story here, but it’ll be for another day)

So, this trans guy is older than I am by a few years. Caucasian. I met him through my professor who was handling my class of speech writing. The class was about speaking in public and at events. And we had a project to prepare us for a speaking engagement. The professor recommended tutors for whoever in his class wanted them.

Tim was the person he recommended to me and two other guys. Tim was beautiful. Stunning really. If you’ve seen the TV series, Chuck, and you know the character, Captain Awesome, who is played by actor Ryan McPartlin, then you would have an idea of Tim’s good looks. Except he is brunette and not as tall as the actor. He had a really beautiful face.

He was to meet me and a couple other students to help us prepare for our big speech day. We started the meeting by talking about ourselves, and he came out straight to tell us that he was transgender. He said he was born a female, in the wrong body, but now, he was in a body he was comfortable with.

I had no problem with that. I just wanted to pass the class. The other two guys however, the Muslims that they are, politely excused themselves from his services. And so, I was there alone with him. When he started talking, I barely paid any attention. I was mesmerized by him. I sat there, thinking about him, his beautiful face, his small voice, his elegant countenance. This was the first time I’d be seeing a transgender person and I was fixated.

By the end of the meeting, during which I’d barely grasped anything, I asked for his number. At first, he said no. But I persisted, saying I might still need his help, and that as my class-assigned helper, he was obligated to be available to me. I said this with some levity, and he laughed, finally acquiescing and giving me his number.

Eventually, the class came and passed, and I aced it. Two weeks had gone by at this time, and finally, I had a reason to call him. When he answered, I thanked him for his help. Then I asked him out to dinner. He said no, in a way that made me know why. He was a senior, in his final year, and I was a freshman. The school is very classist and filled with privileged white people. And in that sort of environment, you really have to know your place.

But I wasn’t going to take no for an answer. And again, he acquiesced, suggesting that we go out of town for the date (My town is a small one, and he usually gets the stick for being trans).

On the day of our date, he drove us to St. Paul, which is six hours out of town. It was a really fun outing, during which we talked about everything. We shared stories about each other, and the chemistry felt so right. I was drawn to him, and when he suggested crashing in a hotel for the night (because ain’t nobody driving six hours back to town that same day), I knew he was drawn to me too.

That night was perfect. We got inside the hotel room, and there was some quiet between us. Then I kissed him. He kissed me back. I’d never had a kiss like that, intimate and yet steamy. I had to take a beat to tell him that I hadn’t ever been with a trans person, and he said he would guide me through it. After that, there was no need for any more words. We kissed passionately; I couldn’t get enough of his lips, those sensual features that I’d been fantasizing about ever since I first laid eyes on him. As we kissed, I began wanting him so much, I felt my heart would give out from the pressure of my need. I unbuckled his pants and gently laid him down on the bed. His vagina came into view. He hadn’t had any sex change done, because, according to him, he liked his vagina. I asked him if I could eat his pussy and he said yes. I set about eating him out with a passionate dedication that had his legs shaking. I went from pussy to ass, rimming him, then returning to eat his pussy. He was panting and asking me to stop, that he was close and didn’t want to orgasm yet.

Then he sucked my dick. The blow job was pure bliss. At some point, I was more than ready to make love to him. It was vaginal sex; I thrust into him at first steadily, slowly progressing to fast and rough. He wanted to be spanked and talked dirty as I fucked him. He was a lot kinky, wanting to be choked as well, and then flipping me down on my back so he could ride me. It was really great sex. By the time I climaxed, I believed I was in love with him.

The next morning, we had sex again, before checking out of the hotel and driving back to town. Summer was upon us, and we went our separate ways to spend the summer. We stayed in touch though, talking and texting all the time. School resumed on the first of September and he was returning for his final semester.

Seeing him again caused a swell of emotion inside me. I wanted him. I wanted us to be a thing. To have a relationship. I told him and he said no. He said the night we spent together was magical and it should remain that way. Upon hearing this, I got really mad at him, and reacting from a place of hurt, I stated cussing at him. To my startle, he began crying. Seeing his tears made me instantly contrite. As I reached out to cajole him, he asked me if I was out to my family. I said no. He asked if I could ever introduce him to my family. I said no. I could see where this was going even before he said it.

That there is the problem,” he told me, his beautiful eyes still glassy with tears. “I am tired of hiding. Of being a secret. I don’t want to be anybody’s secret. You are from a conservative Nigerian family and you are not out, and probably won’t be for a long time. And I just want love and to be loved out in the open.”

By the time he was done talking, we were both crying. I truly cared about him and was sure I would make him happy. But we were in very different places apparently. I understood his need, even if I couldn’t be the one to fulfil it. I wished him well and we parted ways.

He is married now. To a good guy who went to school with us. He’s a nurse in the Army and his husband is an heir to a small community bank here.

What about me, you ask. Well, I’m still in the closet, not yet ready to share the secret of my bisexuality with my family.

Written by Bhawscity

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50 Comments

  1. realme
    July 08, 07:46 Reply

    this is the best and beautifully horrible story I’ve read here in kitodiaries…so raw and honest. Remaining in the dark always, always takes so much happiness from us.

    • Pink Panther
      July 08, 07:55 Reply

      Remaining in the dark always, always takes so much happiness from us.

      These words! Too true!

  2. Mandy
    July 08, 07:50 Reply

    Lol. Nigerian meen, whether gay or straight, you people are always so problematic. Someone is trying to break out and be free and open, and you’re trying to bae him from your closet. LOL. I’m glad Tim followed his heart, which is to stay free and out. Instead of following his…well, pussy, which would have led him to say yes to you and become a love that’s hidden.

    This story is refreshingly brand new. More trans stories please.

    • Bhaws
      July 08, 21:49 Reply

      I’m glad he followed his heart too! I’m not even mad at anything lol.

  3. Olutayo
    July 08, 07:54 Reply

    I have a transgender question. Hopefully someone will clarify me. If Tim is a trans man who believes he was born in the wrong body and has now taken steps to fix that by transitioning, why does he still keep his vagina? Why does he like that part of himself? Isn’t the vagina a token of femininity that he shouldn’t keep, considering it is part of the wrong body? I’m just confused by him “liking” the vagina. By transwomen who keep their dicks and enjoy the use of it when they could snip it off. Doesn’t that appreciation of the part of the body you despise so much a conflict of you despising the body it came with?

    • J
      July 08, 14:36 Reply

      Please don’t say that! Not all trans people despise their body parts. I’m a pre-op trans woman and I like my penis.There’s something called gender dysphoria, some trans people experience it, while others don’t.
      Gender dysphoria (GD) is the distress a person feels due to their birth-assigned sex and gender not matching their gender identity. People who experience gender dysphoria are typically transgender.Gender dyphoria is the major factor psychotherapists look at when it’s comes to giving trans people the legal advice and go ahead for sex reassignment surgery in order to avoid any form of regret in the future (because some trans people don’t need transitioning, some tend to regret and detransition afterwards).

      There are trans people who keep their birth-assigned sex organ and still proceed with HRT (hormones replacement therapy), while others aren’t comfortable with their birth-assigned sex organs and they proceed with SRS (sex reassignment surgery). Hormones replacement therapy helps to reduce the production of testosterone in trans women and estrogen in trans men. With a daily intake of hormones for a trans woman, her body becomes softer, her voice less deeper and to some extent she begins to develop breast and curves. For a trans man, he begins to grow facial hair and develop some male physical features (read more about Female to Male trans). Most trans men undergo a surgery to remove their breast(mastectomy) and some trans women under a surgery to increase their breast size (breast augmentation). Pre-op trans people are the ones that have not gone for sex reassignment, while post-op trans people are the ones that have done sex reassignment.

      So not all trans people despise their birth-assigned sex organ. Some keep their birth-assigned sex organs and still present themselves as their preferred gender(society call those people “shemales” and it’s a very offensive terminology). What the brain says is all that matters. All trans people whether pre-op or post-op are valid. If society was more accepting and supportive, I believe trans people would have been more comfortable and happier.

      • Chiedozie
        July 08, 22:57 Reply

        What does any of this mean? How can you be trans and not have gender dysphoria, since gender dysphoria is the premise on which transness is based? What is the point of referring to yourself as a “pre-op” trans woman if the “op” is not in the cards for you? What exactly is this terminology supposed to convey with regard to a trans person who is comfortable with his/her sex organs?

        What exactly does “what the brain says is all that matters” mean? Are you by any chance making the utterly false and unscientific assertion that there’s such a thing as the male/female brain?

        Does no one care to make sense anymore?

        • J
          July 09, 00:52 Reply

          Make a research, not all trans people experience gender dsyphoria. And you don’t have to understand why. Just like you can’t understand why you feel attracted to the same sex or why you are Igbo instead of a Fulani man.

        • J
          July 09, 01:38 Reply

          Let me make this clear, definitely all trans people feel distress about their birth-assigned sex at some point in their lives. Gender dysphoria is mostly seen as the act of hating one’s body part and trying by all means to change it. GD can be treated by transitioning or psychotherapy. Like myself, some people know deep within they are transgendered, but they’re okay with their host bodies and they’re not willing to change or transition for personal reasons(I personally have struggled to come to terms with not transitioning and I am okay with it). I can wear dresses if I like, I can put on makeup and etc But I have accepted myself the way I am and I don’t feel less than the woman I am. You might see a man, but I see a woman.

          So whenever someone try to tell you who they are, best believe them and respect that. Don’t try to look for scientific prove or what not. There’s no science like what and how I/we am/are feeling.

          • Pink Panther
            July 09, 06:35 Reply

            So you are a trans woman who for the past months have been lecturing us gay men on how to live our lives, eh? You, a trans woman, deigning to be condescending about the choices gay men make? Are you serious? All these while, you had no right at all to be so patronising, to condescend, to lecture, to judge, to speak like you are one of us — and you have been doing exactly that. And now, all of a sudden, you’re really just a trans woman??? Please the next time you feel like speaking so intimately about the struggle of gay men in Nigeria, Don’t. Stick to the struggle I should imagine you should only concern yourself with.

            • J
              July 09, 12:44 Reply

              Here comes the transphobia. I thought we are in the same community. I speak my mine on the basis of having good morals, a deep connection and something meaningful.

              You can’t use guilt to silence me.Your defense mechanism is quite funny, you can do better. Most of you are not considerate enough to relate with the issues surrounding transgender people. The battle against internalised homophobia and homophobia have not been conquered, so I don’t expect more understanding and acceptance of trans people somehow.

              Sometimes, I struggle so much to ignore some certain things and keep silent. But I struggle with my conscience and feel someone somewhere could find my output helpful. I know the standard and I can’t put up with it, you don’t have to agree with everything I say. But don’t make me feel like I don’t want the best for this community.

              • Mandy
                July 09, 17:26 Reply

                “Here comes the transphobia”? Are you serious? 😂😂😂😂 This is legit hilarious. How was he transphobic? You’ve been very judgmental of gay men on this blog,and he pointed out how you have no basis to judge so harshly a community you apparently don’t belong to when you should be focused on your struggles…. And THAT’S transphobia to you?

                Are you kidding?

                It’s transgender people like you that make your community a joke. When you slap transphobia on everyone that says anything remotely contentious about you.

                Do yourself a favour. Leave your moralistic high ground alone where it concerns gay men, and focus on what to represent that’ll contribute to the good of your own community. In case you haven’t noticed, Bobrisky is doing you people a strong disservice.

                • J
                  July 09, 23:34 Reply

                  In Nigeria whether you are bisexual, transgender, intersex or queer, we are all classified as gay or lesbians. So what are you saying about me not knowing the struggle of gay men? Is it not gay
                  men I have been dating? I haven’t transitioned yet, so I have never dated a straight man. I only attract bisexual men and gay men because I don’t have a breast and a vagina. Most people don’t see and fall in love with the soul, they only fall in love with the body. I have been living as a gay man in this country because I am only attracted to men.

                  Bobrisky is living her life, whatever she identifies as is her cup of tea as long as she happy, the world is hard on us all enough.

              • Pink Panther
                July 09, 17:36 Reply

                Transphobia now covers when I question your individual bullshit? Lol. You are funny.

                And shockingly not as intelligent as you’d like us to believe.

                You’ve supposedly been trans, and all this time, you’ve NEVER ONCE shared anything on the blog to illuminate the plight of the trans community or to humanise the struggle of the trans people living in Nigeria. And you have the gall to talk about us “not being considerate enough to relate with issues surrounding trans people”. Are you fucking kidding me?

                What have YOU done to sensitive trans issues on this blog? What have YOU contributed to enlighten anyone here on trans issues? You haven’t even had the balls before now to identify as trans. So busy have you been with judging the choices of gay and bisexual men. And we’re supposed to take you seriously???

                You’re a joke. Until you have actually done something that shows you care for the community you’d like us to believe you belong to, this high ground you’re taking is just laughable at best and insidious at worst.

                Queer better, my dear. And while you’re at it, learn the actual meaning of transphobia.

                • J
                  July 09, 19:48 Reply

                  You will read my raw and unedited story one day. I can sense and feel transphobia without it being loudly spoken or expressed. I have mentioned it once or twice on this blog that I am a pre-op trans woman. I have attempted to answer questions and made simple explanation about trans people, at least that was what brought about this argument. You’re the one not taking note honey, you’re probably busy thinking about hookups 😂😂😂

                  I can’t argue with you and your partners in crime. I’m now hungry really thinking about what to eat, if you can excuse me Pinkress the queen of trouble waters 😝

                  • Pink Panther
                    July 09, 21:25 Reply

                    You can sense transphobia?

                    Must be a superpower. Congrats to you.

                    • J
                      July 09, 23:12

                      Yes, all thanks to mother nature 😊

  4. Tristan
    July 08, 10:19 Reply

    I’m confused too. Isn’t a trans man supposed to be attracted to females? Is it possible to not be comfortable in the body you were born with and still be attracted to a person of the opposite sex?

    • Mitch
      July 08, 10:41 Reply

      This is like asking why men are attracted to men and women to women when they could just as easily be attracted to someone of the opposite sex.

      Attraction has nothing to do with the body you’re born in. Trans men can be gay, bisexual, pansexual or heterosexual. Trans women can be gay, bisexual, pansexual or heterosexual. Or even asexual.

      Being in a body that feels right isn’t sexual at all. It’s about identity. And identity doesn’t affect sexuality.

      • Tristan
        July 08, 12:56 Reply

        Pithily expressed. That’s right, Mitch.

      • Bhaws
        July 08, 21:46 Reply

        Apt reply. Thanks for that.

  5. J
    July 08, 15:01 Reply

    Bhawcity you are a bisexual, congratulations to you, lucky you. In almost all your posts that I have read, you kept on saying that you’re bisexual and you’re not ready to come out to your family members and stuff. Whatever is it that is going on in your life, I hope you find peace. If you’re living in a friendly country and yet you can’t live your life then please stop saying that 👏👏👏 It’s discouraging and it gives one the feeling of hopelessness. There is a thing about being LGBTIQ.To some people it’s basically their entire life, almost everything they do revolves around it and it’s no joke!

    • Bhaws
      July 08, 21:45 Reply

      I’m not discouraging anyone from living his/her truth. I make certain decisions based on myself and where I find myself. I’m not holding anyone back physically or psychologically.

    • Mash
      July 09, 01:31 Reply

      I am really struggling to understand your point really! That you’re out and proud doesn’t mean the next person should do the same or he/she is obligated to do so! Since when did do you become do us? If anyone decides to die in their closet it is their choice and if you want to climb Kilimanjaro and scream ontop of your voice that you’re gay or whatever you identify as it’s still your choice! Don’t hold your life choices and decisions on the next person, we all have different paths to follow in life, nobody owes you their coming out.
      Just so you know there’re married gay men in this same America or any other friendly country you can think of and so are there closeted ones and the ones that wear their identity everyday.
      There’s no manual or guide to the way you as an individual decides to live your life… Allow people do what they are comfortable doing and gives them peace.
      Oh lastly and if as a person you need someone else life as a mirror to live yours then there’s a problem and a lot of growing up to do.
      Always put yourself first and do what makes you happy.

      • J
        July 09, 12:58 Reply

        I had an encounter with this poster. I can say one or two things about him. My understanding of his point of view is different from yours. My approach to his post was quite harsh, but I take responsibility for that… You can die in your closet, but try not to mislead anyone or drag them with you.

        • Bhaws
          July 09, 14:51 Reply

          How the hell I’m I dragging people to my closet with me? Boy please, do say one or two things about me, I want to know.

  6. Chidinma
    July 08, 16:54 Reply

    What I loved about this story the MOST is how he moved on and eventually found someone who loves him openly. From putting two and two together it seems you are from Rochester and honestly, you can live your truth in Rochester or any other place in the US. You have to have the courage to do just that.

    • Bhaws
      July 08, 21:44 Reply

      Lol, I don’t live in Rochester. You won’t even know the city if I mention it.

      • Chidinma
        July 09, 05:36 Reply

        Rochester o! Sheboygan o! Marshall, MN o. Doesn’t matter where. As long as you live here, you can absolutely live your truth.

        • Bhaws
          July 09, 08:47 Reply

          Come and force me to come out naa… no, come drag me out! Apart from coming from a conservative Nigerian family, even if I’m an African American, i will not come out in this political climate. What are you even talking about? Do you think that the USA is a liberal country? This place is still a very conservative country. Hollywood and DC can shout all its shout, at the end of the day, it’s still a conservative place.
          Imagine the arrogance “as long as you live here, you can live your truth”, go tell that to the six black trans women that have been killed this year alone or to people I have seen that are homeless just because they are gay. Wtf are you? Do you know me? Come respect yourself here ooo.

          • Patrick
            July 09, 13:23 Reply

            I’d like to completely dissent from this notion that the US is a conservative country. Yes, there are conservative elements, especially in small towns in the south, but there’s also a healthy liberal population.

            The political climate you talked about brought a gay governor to Colorado. It brought lesbian mayors to Chicago and Madison, one of them African American. Buttigieg, isn’t doing poorly on the campaign trail.

            You obviously don’t know what you’re talking about calling the US “a very conservative country”

            It is unfortunate that those trans people were killed, but they’ve always suffered the most, and is proof that more work still needs to be done. But it can’t serve as premise for this your ludicrous conclusion.

            If you want to remain in the closet, please do but don’t blame it on the political clime.

            • Bhaws
              July 09, 14:01 Reply

              Here we go again with Chicago et al. Believe whatever you want to believe okay?

              • Patrick
                July 09, 15:11 Reply

                I guess you won’t be defending your claims.
                Pray tell, where do you live in Minnesota so that I can come visit you and evaluate these your strange ideas?😂😂😂

                • Bhaws
                  July 09, 16:06 Reply

                  I seriously do not want to discuss politics with you.
                  After last years elections, the GOP is in control of 27 states compared to the Dems 23. Of the 50 states, the GOP is in control of 30 state houses, while the dems have 18. The GOP is in full control of 21 states, while the dems are at 14.
                  The GOP ran Roy Moore, a know racist and pedophile for Senate in 2019…. what do these tell you about America in 2019?
                  The USA recognized same sex marriage nationwide in 2015 while Canada its neighbor did so in 2005, and let it be known that it was so because a conservative Chief Justice appointed by Bush jnr decided to join the liberal judges, it wasn’t a unanimous decision.
                  In 2013, the supreme court struck down two important parts of the civil rights act section 5 and section 4(b). Do you know what these judgement led to? It led to states disenfranchising people of color, closing down voting stations in predominantly black neighborhoods. That’s why those in Georgia didn’t have a governor Stacy Abrams last year. A gerrymandering case went up to th SC this year, they said they can’t decide it, they didn’t even bother sending it down to the lower court to make it’s way up back again, nope they straight up said we don’t give a fuck.
                  Over the last decades, the GOP has gone far right, and guess what? They still keep winning elections. What has the dems done in return? You would have guessed move a bit left? But nope, it went moderate, moved to the center. Thank God for the candidacy of Bernie Sanders in 2016 to show people that a far left person can still have an albeit succesful shot at the WH.
                  Millions of people are happy that Trump is locking kids in cages, yes tens of millions of people are. The cruelty is the point as someone said. Based on a recent gallop poll, conservatives still outnumber liberal, 35% to 25%, and 35% moderate.

                  • Patrick
                    July 09, 16:40 Reply

                    Bhaws dear,
                    I agree with these facts but this is one side of the story. You’ve failed to mention that Roy Moore in fact lost that election in a deeply conservative state. You also failed to mention that Hilary Clinton won the popular votes. And you skipped the part where the House is currently in democratic hands.

                    I’m not contesting the fact that conservatives exist or that they seem to be gaining traction. My contention is about your claim that the US is very conservative. This is simply indefensible. It’s not Iran or Nigeria, you know.

                    • Bhaws
                      July 09, 17:39

                      He lost, yes, but why nominate him in the first place? He lost by 1.5 margins only, what does that tell you? 92% of GOP votes for him. We all know the popular vote is useless here, the EC selects the president, and higher number of dems live in urban areas. Trump ran on whiteness of USA and he got elected, he told folks he will make USA great again and he got elected, he’s calling on killing of people and he’s still president. What do you think would have happened if Obama did all these things? His wife is an ivy league educated attorney and she got abuse upon abuse, trumps wife was an escort and she’s getting praises from these white folk. It’s not Nigeria and Iran yet, but its reaching there.
                      Dems won the house because they ran on holding DJT accountable, ran on Medicare et el, which they are not currently doing so I won’t be surprised when they lose it next year.

                    • Chidinma
                      July 09, 18:29

                      Patrick,
                      There’s this narrative that I’m refusing to be a part of when it comes to how conservative America is. There’s also this fallacy to somehow equate it with the rabid conservative religious culture in Nigeria. It is simply NOT the same thing!
                      Pride month just finished and look at all the companies who had the pride flag albeit for capital gains. America will never not now nor in the future be Nigeria when it comes to the issues of human rights. Anyone telling us any different is trying to pass off their innate fears and failures to live their authentic lives as the truth and reality.
                      Examples you and I have read on here has been examples of people being disowned and thrown out by their families. I mean you live here. Find a job, roommates and just do your thing. Let your family decide with time if losing you as a child is worth more than their homophobia.
                      Take student loans for school just like everyone else does. I mean what does a coward know about anything but to quake and shake inside the closet that is so comfortable for them.

                      No one is telling anyone how to live but using the political climate as an excuse is extremely lazy at best.

                • Bhaws
                  July 09, 16:27 Reply

                  You gave Chicago as an example, yes Chicago elected a black gay woman mayor, because it is a very diverse city. Black people make up like 34% of the city, whites, 29 or so and Hispanics are very high too. Look at how you said in the south, without giving any thought to the flyover country, without any thoughts to the midwest, which votes highly conservative.
                  Compared to Europe, this is a very conservative country, you might be looking at it with Nigerian eyes or whatever country you were a resident before.
                  White nationalists are marching, changing nazi slogans, black people are being killed, people are calling cops on POC like it’s okay to do that, Namcy Pelosi doesnt want to start an impeachment inquiry into a corrupt, racist president because she doesnt want to piss off his base, or touch the white power. People still vote GOP candidates knowing that will mean an end to their healthcare, but it doesnt matter as long as the vote prevents one immigrant from coming to take the job they don’t have.

                  • Chidinma
                    July 09, 17:14 Reply

                    Yet here you are having this conversation on a blog set up by a Nigerian man living in Nigeria who also happens to have a YouTube page where they discuss Nigerian LGBT issues. Someone can literally march into their homes, drag them out much to the chagrin of others who most likely won’t even step in to defend them. That is a REAL, life threat YET they somehow manage to live in their truth but you won’t because Trump and his cronies? I mean I’d ignore but this ain’t it dawg.

                    • Bhaws
                      July 09, 17:47

                      I said it in my other post, I’m not coming out mainly because of my family. I am shedding light on the plights of LGBT POC. I said even if I want to come out, not in this climate, that’s not the main reason I’m not out. You think they don’t drag people out of their homes here? My friend is in the Army rn because that’s how she’s gonna pay for med school, you know why? Her dad disowned her for being gay and wanting to go to med school, not working in the farm.
                      Institutional racism is still alive, another friend black gay friend of mine was arrested, and I’m not gonna go into details of what happened to him here, but it was bad. I’m glad you are out, happy for you, but please not everyone has that courage. Maybe it was good for you to come out to your family, great, awesome! But please don’t be giving me advice on how to live and when to come out.

                    • Chidinma
                      July 09, 18:08

                      😂😂😂😂 Carry on.

          • Chidinma
            July 09, 16:05 Reply

            Look at this one shouting from his closet in America about who the fuck I am. Please! a girl with more balls than you will ever have in your entire existence. Stay in your closet and revel in being inside it. Wear it as a badge of honor too. Childish prick! This entire oh the society is blah blah is a level of victimhood I refuse to indulge in. You live abroad. You can live fully and truly. You just love the comfortability being in the closet affords you on the outside even though it kills you on the inside. I’m glad that man walked away and has found love with someone willing to give it. Love is truly for the brave! Fuck outta here with your mouthing off bullshit on KD. Who TF you think you stepping to? Park well!

            • Bhaws
              July 09, 16:11 Reply

              Woman, I give not one shit about your thoughts of me.

                • Persimmon
                  July 10, 00:21 Reply

                  It’s his choice to come out of the closet or remain there. He’s a grown man and you shouldn’t decide for him or force him to. Everyone has their own situation and paths so you or I have no right in deciding for him. For instance, I have pretty much lived most of my life in the US and parts of the UK and have been exposed to this said advanced/understanding society… but may never come out of the closet, except of course to my future wife.

  7. Theo
    July 09, 10:21 Reply

    Funny thing about the brain…. I have come to the conclusion that the brain is crazy.
    I am born female, growing up, I hated my body.
    The major statement growing up from family was always “you should have come as a boy” when I found out about transition, I was over the moon but the cost(financial and toll on the body) brought me back to earth.

    Why I said the brain in crazy is because I am in a female body, I date women but when I daydream of me post opp as a man, I see my self dating men.
    Maybe my own brain is just gay.

    Kisses to you all .

  8. Share
    July 09, 14:17 Reply

    Until Higwe talks hahaha

    Higwe come and give us comment biko

  9. Lopez
    July 09, 18:10 Reply

    ohh Theo… just like that I fell in love, I’ll be here waiting when you transition and wanna date a man. Your brain is so gay indeed.

  10. Leith
    July 12, 13:57 Reply

    This is such a beautiful story❤️❤️🤦🏼‍♂️

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