Previously on NOT JUST A STORY


“Are you now sleeping with men?” Mother had asked.

The words startled me as a wave of guilt crashed about inside me.

I stared at her, not knowing what to say. I opened and shut my mouth repeatedly like a fish out of water.

Then her face split and she was chuckling. “Come now, don’t freak out.” She was shaking her head as she laughed. “I was only asking because I got an email from your friend, Pelumi. So I just wanted to confirm if you are now seeing guys and you couldn’t even tell me.”

I opened my mouth to protest that, even though I knew not what to say.

But she waved a hand at me as she went on. “Don’t worry I’m not hurt. It’s just that I will no longer buy that cook book you asked for. Nwa ara!” And now, she was really laughing.

I felt the pull of her mirth. It was tempting to join her in her hilarity. But she’d said something that alarmed me.

“Pelumi sent you an email?” I queried. “What email? Can I read it please?”

“Ah-ah-ahn,” she tsk-tsked, raising her phone above her head and out of my reach. She was still laughing when I advanced on her; I’d grown taller than her, so it was easy to tackle the phone from her.

Then I unlocked it and went to check her emails.

“When you are done reading it,” Mother said as she exited the kitchen, “come and follow me let’s go and buy gas. You are driving.” That was her code for “We need to talk”.

I found Pelumi’s mail and read through it. As I read, I felt a mix of anger, shame, heartache and disgust course through me. I could not believe how low Pelumi had sunk.

He wrote:

Ma, I’m Pelumi, your son’s friend. I just want to tell you what your son has been up to recently. It’s a thing of concern and shame.

Ma, your son is a flaming homosexual. He has become an uncouth prostitute, always parading with old men and having sex for money. As his best friend, I have a lot of knowledge about his whereabouts. I know things that you don’t even know, ma.

He contracted STD early this year and got one of his sugar daddies to pay for his treatment. He had sex with his Chemistry teacher so he could pass the subject.

He even came for me, but I’m a righteous Muslim. I rebuked him.

I tried to show him the good road but he stopped being friends with me. He always complains about his bleeding anus. I’m scared he will be used for ritual by those ungodly old men your son follows up and down. If he dies untimely, just know that as his friend, I tried my best to correct his ways.

Ma, I want you to punish him very well. Seize his phone and ground him for a long time. I hope he learns from his mistakes.

Thank you, ma.

That was his mail.

“Baby!” Mother called from the car.

I moved to join her, while trying to think of ways to defend myself against these blatant lies. But I couldn’t form any coherent thought. My rage at Pelumi overshadowed my clear thinking.

Mother and I soon set off to get gas. For some minutes, I drove and the car was absolutely silent. No one spoke. Then I began gearing myself to say something.

Before I could get a word out, Mother, as though she had seen me decide to break the silence, cut me off. “Don’t bother,” she said suddenly. “I know those were all lies.”

Stunned, I shot her a quick look. She looked entirely relaxed on the passenger seat beside me.

“I’m confused…” I stuttered. “Are you not supposed to be angry?”

“Maybe… But I’m not.”


“Well, for one, I’m not stupid. Two, I trust the way I brought up my children. Three, I know you very well – you that is afraid of common cockroach, it is men you now want to follow up and down. And four, you failed Chemistry.”

Exactly! I found myself thinking. How could I have sex with my Chemistry teacher to pass the subject and still end up failing it. Oh Pelumi, you miserable sonofabitch!

“But what I don’t understand,” Mother was still talking, “is the reason behind this his idiotic yet sinister plot. Nna, tell me, what did you do to him?”

And so, I began narrating everything that had led to up to this fuckery. It was an uncomfortable story, but I was talking to my mum. She holds no judgment. She listened to the end, and understood. She was upset though, upset that I’d been keeping things from her. But she was pleased I opened up to her.

She reached for my hand on the steering and rubbed it. “I forgive you,” she said.

“You forgive me?” I asked in confusion.

“Yes, I forgive you for being such an ishi okporoko.” She slapped a hand at my head, and we laughed.

When she sobered up, she said, “My son, please always be careful. Remember what I told you when you come out to me. Not everyone will love you like I do. As for this Pelumi boy, I’m glad you’ve cut off from him. Continue to do so. Cease all contact with him. I will call his parents and have them deal with him. No one attempts to hurt my child and gets away with it.:

I felt a rush of love and appreciation course through me, which rapidly turned to mortification when she added cheekily, “But wait first o, nna, with the way you are clearly growing, I think I’ll have to step in and find you a good guy that’ll treat you right.”

I groaned.


Written by Bain

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  1. Francis
    April 05, 07:08 Reply

    Yaasssssssssss! ?? Make your mama come adopt me already. This is everything I wish I have with my folks. ???

    I happy for you die man

    • bain
      April 05, 09:30 Reply

      ???….she has plenty kids already.

      • FJ
        April 05, 14:05 Reply

        Hahaha…hehehehe….Nna, dis isn’t just a mom, bain, she is a soul mate

      • ambivalentone
        April 05, 14:52 Reply

        Shattap dia. Is that how ur mother raised u? To be selfish? Bonga fish head!

        • FJ
          April 05, 23:46 Reply

          little brat, ain’t any of those names u tagged me. Eeyan lo ko eshin loro. Am a friend to all here including you.

  2. peach-head
    April 05, 07:52 Reply

    “But wait first o,
    nna, with the way you are clearly
    growing, I think I’ll have to step in
    and find you a good guy that’ll treat
    you right.”

    i laugh in chineese, swahilli, latin and greek.

    • Pink Panther
      April 05, 08:54 Reply

      Lol. Don’t worry, peach. You’ll find your own, you hear?
      And may God punish the man who made you so bitter about love.

    • bain
      April 05, 09:31 Reply

      lol…she tried though,but failed multiple times.

  3. Simba
    April 05, 08:48 Reply

    I think the best thing that can happen to a Nigerian gay man,is to date a man out and accepted by his parents. Oh my gosh, u can’t imagine how strong and respected tht relationship would be, family dinners and holidays. Oga Bain, na to find better husband remain,congratulations dear.

    • Vhar.
      April 05, 12:41 Reply

      You have no idea the trouble you put me in with this comment. ?

      • bain
        April 05, 18:50 Reply

        hahaha…vhar abiakwa nke ya.

  4. Absalom
    April 05, 08:50 Reply

    Aww. This is beautiful, and heart-warming, and shows there’s hope.


    After some people will come here and say all of this, everything we preach and hope for from here, is about “cock”! Mtscheeeeew!!

    Biko, Bain, better person, greet your mother for me. 🙂

    • bain
      April 05, 10:01 Reply

      My mum says ‘Hi’.

  5. WhoIsUgo
    April 05, 08:51 Reply

    Wow, your mum is so amazing! Please show her plenty love and attention she deserves it.

  6. Enigma
    April 05, 08:58 Reply

    Nice story,wonderful is a better word..I so wish this was my family,your parents should adopt me already.You know,a family where everyone accepts you and mummy loves you more for who you are without any iota of sentiment.
    Oh,if wishes were horses……..

  7. omiete
    April 05, 09:23 Reply

    Well am not stupid….. Ishi Opkoroko… Gosh I love your mum. Am I the only one laughing at that email??

    • bain
      April 05, 09:36 Reply

      Trust me,that day it was not funny at all,my mum just saved me.

  8. OJ
    April 05, 10:05 Reply

    Amazing Mom. Beautiful Son. Inspiring Story. I love every bit of it! Send my love to your mum..

  9. Tobi
    April 05, 10:09 Reply

    Bain. I really want to meet your mum. ??

    • bain
      April 05, 11:48 Reply

      When you are around, you’ll meet her.

  10. Khaleesi
    April 05, 10:16 Reply

    Bain biko hold this woman tight!! from now on, your no 1 mission in life must be to make her happy and proud! You are indeed blessed! I don’t need to tell you why!

  11. Bloom
    April 05, 11:03 Reply

    Are you absolutely sure your mom doesn’t want anymore children?

    This is wonderful! She is wonderful! You are wonderful!

  12. bain
    April 05, 11:59 Reply

    I guess I’ll be making more entries.
    thanks PP.???

  13. Jide
    April 05, 12:30 Reply

    Loved the story!!! So uplifting!!!!

    I thought you were bisexual tho. (From your previous comments. )

    • bain
      April 05, 18:51 Reply

      That’s an entirely different story.

  14. Tali
    April 05, 12:41 Reply

    Your mum can’t have many children already jare. This is so beautiful. I’m really happy for you.

  15. Vhar.
    April 05, 12:43 Reply

    Your mother’s last cheeky comment though. Some women are just birds of a feather. ?

  16. El
    April 05, 13:52 Reply

    Well, this is fiction anyways.

    • Pink Panther
      April 05, 16:00 Reply

      Why? Because it tells the story of family love and acceptance that you’re not familiar with? If he had written about how his mother cussed him and threw him out of the house for being gay, then it would be nonfiction to you?

      • El
        April 06, 13:54 Reply

        Darling, I’m not a pessimist. I have a loving and supportive family if you must know, rather I’m just being realistic. It’s really not that deep. Okay?

        • Pink Panther
          April 06, 19:00 Reply

          You’re funny, El. Realistic, by your definition, is a family that is just marginally supportive of their gay son? And that definition is supposed toapply to every one?
          *shaking my head* The damage we do to ourselves sha. Carry on with your ‘realistic’ beliefs, oga. While others are busying enjoying their loving mothers, you hear?
          And you keep saying it’s not that deep, and in the same breath insinuate that the writer is not being truthful. Oga, goan sit down somewhere and reset the way you think.

    • bain
      April 05, 18:56 Reply

      lol…its not fiction bro.

      • El
        April 06, 13:40 Reply

        Okay…. My believe though is, Some Nigerian mothers can be okay with having a gay child, but I doubt if any Nigerian mother would take the trouble of getting her son a man. So the story might be non fiction, however, it might have been spiced up for our enjoyment. Just my thought though. @Pink Panther, it’s not that deep cause lots of us here have supportive families.

        • Francis
          April 06, 13:43 Reply

          Lots of us here have supportive families but this level of support is excessive and should be frowned upon as it is unrealistic. ??

          • El
            April 06, 14:30 Reply

            “I think I’ll have to step in and find you a good guy that’ll treat you right.” If this part of the story is really true, I’ll be so happy for him and wish it were my mum, but don’t we all love fantasies? *Mariah’s smile*

        • bain
          April 06, 14:31 Reply


          well she says that all the time, sometimes jokingly. she tried hooking me up with her friends son,but I wasn’t interested….she also tries to hook me up with her friends daughters too.

            • bain
              April 06, 14:39 Reply

              I had a thing with a girl once,(I’d probably write about that saga)…
              but I’m 99% gay and 100% me.

              • Malik
                August 06, 12:32 Reply

                Stealing that! “99% gay and 100% me”. Consider it stolen. #Latecomment

          • El
            April 06, 15:32 Reply

            It’s cool. (In Gwen Stefani’s voice)

  17. onikolobo
    April 05, 16:20 Reply

    Chai. See me blushing while reading the whole piece. God bless your mom Bain. Love is indeed a beautiful thing especially when family pours it out on you with no holds bar.

  18. Sage
    April 05, 19:43 Reply

    @Mama Bain and Mama Vhar una such say una no need extra adult pikin?

  19. Eddie
    April 05, 21:35 Reply

    in total disbelief…. In this country??? Dude,you are one lucky bloke

  20. boniface
    April 06, 05:23 Reply

    such a wonderful mommy bain ur mommy is like a true nature of my sister before she was worried of me being gay till the day l outed myself to her during a closed room talk she accepted me like that but her advice still ponder at my heart she said that l should be careful on whom l date and that there are a lot of ritualist around that although that am in school and in need of money that l should notify her rather than engaging in a dirty business ever since that my whole sibling have shown me true loves and care more than l could find at the gaybourhood .

    • bain
      April 06, 10:59 Reply

      awww,true acceptance is beautiful.

  21. Delle
    April 06, 08:08 Reply

    After reading the letter from that friend of yours, all I could decipher was “DAFT”.

    Bleeding anus, really? That guy is desperate.

    Your mum. I’m curious. Is she an atheist? A half-caste? Or just some super-mum who really knows what it is to be a mother? I love her and I have to meet her biko.

    As for Pelumi, I pray he gets what’s coming to him
    A bleeding anus won’t be a bad start.
    Nice story. Makes me feel a lot of ways.

    • Tiercel de Claron
      April 06, 10:32 Reply

      Only half-caste and/or atheist moms know how to be mothers,right?.
      Check your words and thoughts before you rush to type

      • FJ
        April 07, 15:45 Reply

        You read my mind

    • bain
      April 06, 11:01 Reply

      well my mum is partially an atheist, but her fear of hell won’t let her be great.And she’s fully African.

      besides, I know some western mothers that don’t accept their queer kids.Its really not about race.

  22. Jerry
    April 18, 16:18 Reply

    Is this story for real? Heh it seems like a fiction to me. A mother like this Nigeria? Guy, no

  23. ChristianGayBoy
    December 31, 13:59 Reply

    Bain! Bain! Bain!

    Damn! You are one heck of a guy with one heck of a life! You are blessed! And your mother is super duper awesome one every side.

    And again stereotypes are always flawed because one thing is never just one thing. Not only atheist or biracial African parents or heterosexual people are accepting of our coming out story.

    I am very Christian and I came out to my two best friends, flatmate and two pastors. You would expect this 5 people to be homophobic being that they are ‘tongue speaking, ‘fire branded’ christians. But nope.

    In fact the first thing the two pastors said to me was “I need you to know and believe that you are not possessed. You are in every bit a child of God.”

    Let’s just realize that the world is becoming better enlightened and Nigeria is not left out of this reality. Even the Bible says “… Knowledge shall increase.”

    It’s been years this article was written but I just have to say this, we are birthing better realities and it’s high time we enjoy it without the need to inserts ‘buts’ or ‘exceptions’

    Oh and Bain if you are seeing this, I do truly want to be in contact with you. 🥺🥺🥺

  24. Delphine
    April 20, 14:30 Reply

    Your story makes me want to share mine. I’m yet to come out officially to my mom. But especially after my last relationship I do know I have her total love. She walked in on us one evening kissing and she said her parlor ………….(if I decided to write, I’d complete what she said) 😂. I love my mom and I love your mom. Some moms are just the best!

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