How To Know A Gay Man In Nigeria
1. If you sag your trousers, you are gay. (Why the hell are you advertising your ass?)
2. If you wear one pair of boxers for a hundred years in a bid to gather up musk and protect your ass, you are gay. (Why else do things going into your ass bother you?)
3. If you walk like a man, you are fucking gay. (Gay guys walk like men too, you know.)
4. If you walk around shirtless or with only boxers on, you issa bloody fag! (Advertising your assets to men, abi? We are watching you.)
5. If you don’t wear pink, well, you are gay. (Your fear of pink is the beginning of your homosexuality.)
6. If you womanize in public, you are just a homo. (Abi you don’t want us to suspect you, eh? You haf fail!)
7. If you are homophobic, you are as gay as Moonlight. (If homosexuality bothers you, check yourself, bruh…cuz we be checking you.)
8. If you are masculine, you are gay. (Stay there and be faking and over-hyping it o! We see you.)
9. If your means of public transport is okada, you are gay. (So you are comfortable with a man’s butt in front of you, abi? No wonder!)
10. If you watch football, you are gay. (Let us be real for a second. It’s literally just barely-covered hunks everywhere on that field that you are watching. Porn watcher much?)
11. If you go to the gym., bruh, you are gay. (Biko what’s gayer than huffing and puffing in a roomful of semi-clad men?)
12. If you love Jesus and you “kneel” (lol), staring at his half-naked form (lol), saying, “Jesus, cum into me”, brethren, you are gay AF!
Now, with these few points of mine, I hope I’ve been able to convince you on all the ways you can identify a gay man in Nigeria.
Written by Bain
About author
You might also like
“Are You Gay?” What do Nigerian interviewers really intend when they ask celebrities this question?
“What do you have to say to people speculating about your sexuality?” “Do you have anything to say about the rumours that you are gay?” “Of course, I know you
#MrTourism: He’s in it to Win
So Dennis Macaulay’s friend is in the race contending for the crown of Mr. Tourism 2014. And he pretty please with-his-dick-on-top wants y’all to vote for this friend. All you
Is There Anything Happy About The Independence Day?
As you celebrate the Independence, remember that Nigeria is not free. Not really. For how can a nation be free when its people aren’t? Remember the pain of those who
6 Comments
trystham
December 03, 07:53oh bother. I thot it was! Cum UNTO me”???
Henry
December 03, 13:26Numbers 10 n 12 tho….lolzzzzzz
Malik
December 03, 20:4613. If you go to the barber every 5-7 days you are so gay. (You like to feel man balls rub against your arm while he reaches to shape the far angles of your head) Brother! 14 years in jail is yours.
Ikenna
December 03, 21:19i still can’t wrap my head around No. 2; satirical or serious…
Like…. how???
WanglerCrane
December 05, 08:27lol! that’s just it, Gay is not written on the forehead anybody can be gay.
Mattoon
December 20, 16:44Some ppl sef fit be way dey comment don’t shocked but these your tips about Is kind of confusing area boys do sag you can find mostly in universities 🤔