The Straight Roommate

The Straight Roommate

There was something about KCee. This I knew from the first moment I saw him. His charisma was just different from your typical first year student’s. Bearded, funky, overly confident (many freshers tend to have this air of self-consciousness and withdrawal about them, at first though), KCee was just totally different, weirdly so.

I remember my very first meeting with him. I was busily stirring my over-fried stew in a cup-like pot when he came into the room. He stared in my direction for an awkward thirty seconds; I don’t know if he was stunned by me or the intoxicating but choking aroma of my cooking. Then he said, “Ehn, sorry is this Room 218?”

I was going to be sarcastic, seeing as the room number was boldly written on the upper part of the doorpost, but the good spirits got the better of me and I nodded in affirmation and continued stirring, more intently. My first impression of him? Cute, but dumb.

“Anyway,” he continued, “I’m Kenechukwu or you can call me KCee. I was given a corner in this room, but I’ll be packing in fully by next tomorrow.” There was an infinitesimal pause, before he added, “And you?”

I was a little surprised at myself for not being the one chatting him up, which was quite unusual for me, because I love cute boys noticing me, especially when I’m clothed in just a tank-top and a short.

“I’m Delle and I guess I’ll be your roommate,” I said. “All the others went out but when they get back, I’ll be sure to tell them a new guy came in. Kelechi, right?” I was a little unsure; I hadn’t been listening when he carried on talking to me.

“No, Kenechukwu. Or abeg just call me KCee. I no get time.” He flashed a disarming smile at me.

Cute, dumb and razz, I thought, adding one more characteristic to my impression of him.

We said our goodbyes, and he started to leave. He stopped long enough to quip, “Nice cooking, by the way. We go see na.”

I rolled my eyes as the door shut behind him. Who was he trying to flatter? Me that knew very well that I was cooking rubbish.

Two days later, just as he said, he moved in. So boisterous, in a funky sort of way. He quickly made friends with my other roomies, and we merely exchanged handshakes. His personality had me curious about him, because he had the confidence of an MSc student and the swag of a hip-hop star. It was all so pushy, and I was more turned off than intrigued. All these hyperactive dudes don’t do it for me abeg.

As time went on, I quickly came to realize that he was the most generous person I’d ever met. KCee was ready to give you his breakfast and starve all in the name of benevolence. “Na guys things na,” he’d say after carrying out yet another feat of generosity that had those around him amazed.

Now, this guy was generous to all, but when it came to me, he was extravagantly openhanded. I’m not one to ask people for things, not because I’m too full of myself, but because I like to see myself as one who makes do with what he has. And yet, I always ended up getting things from KCee.

“Delle, see this body spray, you like am?” he’d say.

And I’d be like, “Yeah, it’s okay na. What happened to it?”

To which he’d say, “No, nothing o. I just feel like you should have it. I’m tired of using it.”

Tired of using something you just bought four days ago? I’d ask more to myself than to him.

That was how I got things from him; from body sprays, to his perfume, and then a singlet pack he hadn’t even opened to money. I later got to find out his mother was well-to-do. Not Dangote rich, but wealthy enough to erect a sizable duplex for herself and her two sons. His father had died when he was four years old.

Things were essentially good between us. I liked what we had: a close relationship with a straight guy.

Or was he?

Fast-forward three months later. It was nighttime, and we were all sleeping. In the room, our sleeping arrangement was about ten guys sharing five mattresses spread out on the floor. (Don’t ask me why this is so; direct your enquiries to the Federal Government). We sleep by joining the mattresses together and spreading out squeezed side by side. You could probably hear the dreams of the guy sleeping next to you if you listened carefully.

That night, I was stretched out next to KCee. I’m not a deep sleeper; I sleep pretty soundly but not in that dead-to-the-world manner. Some people ‘die’ once they put their heads down on a comfy bed; not me.

A few hours into our slumber, I felt a light touch on my thigh. It was heavy enough to jolt me out of my sleep, but so light I dismissed it as nothing consequential. Maybe a draft of air from the window? Besides, in this sardine-like sleeping arrangement of ours, sleeping bodies touching sleeping bodies was to be expected, no?

I returned to sleep, only to be woken by another touch. Actually this time it wasn’t a touch; it felt more like a grope. I drifted up from sleep to catch a whiff of the body smell that was uniquely his. KCee!

Is this guy actually touching me on purpose, or is this sleeping-body touch? I found myself wondering. There was only one way to find out. I drummed up a slight snore, like I was still asleep, and arched myself on the bed in such a way that my body would occupy a little more space than normal. Then I waited with a beating heart, waiting for the fish to jump at the wriggling worm. And jump it did.

He groped me again, this time more firmly, more assuredly. He was touching me. KCee was actually feeling me up. Issorait. I pretended like nothing was going on. I had to know where all this nocturnal antic was going to lead to. I just had to. So I kept ‘sleeping’.

I felt his hand linger on my thighs, his fingers grazing my body as they slowly made their way to my belly. I could not believe what was happening. The last time I had this experience was with a cousin of mine (story for another day). Questions battered at my mind: Hadn’t KCee said he had a girlfriend? Wasn’t this the same guy that said he would not have Sam Smith’s songs on his phone even if he was given 50K? This was hilarious. Here I was, gay AF, and getting felt up by a cute, good-hearted albeit antigay guy; I had to know what was next. It was only logical that I did. Of course I wasn’t going to sex him in a room where the next person is a finger-length away, but I had to know the extent this supposed straight, homophobic guy would get to with me.

His hand kept going up, and then stopped at my chest. Then he started a search session, his fingers tap-dancing searchingly about on my chest. He was apparently looking for my nipples. I shuddered when he found one. And he immediately began touching, pressing and lightly squeezing the nipple. Goose bumps raced themselves on my skin and it was all I could do not to moan out loud. God, how did he know that my nipples were one of my G-spots?

He continued the onslaught on my nipples. Apparently emboldened by the fact that I hadn’t reacted adversely to his invasion of my body, he proceeded to my ass region and started groping my cheeks. Ewoo! This na temptation! (*in PSquare’s voice*) What was stopping me from simply shucking my shorts right this minute (I usually wear only shorts to sleep) and letting him have his way with me? Apart from my natural self-discipline and the fact that I didn’t want anyone waking up to the sight of me panting under a guy’s dick up my ass, this was KCee! The annoyingly-homophobic, ‘straight’ friend of mine!

And really, I had never before met anyone with as much guts as this KCee had. He actually started pulling down my shorts, obviously wanting to free the globes of flesh he wanted to dive into. And with my heart beating faster than a frantic drummer accompanying the beat of Shakira’s dance, I stayed still and let him pull down my knickers. I was horny! Yes! I was already panting from the series of touching, groping and squeezing, and the fact that his hard-on was seriously poking my side – these and many more had contributed to turning me into jelly.

After my shorts were pulled down, he stopped touching me. I began to get alarmed. Why wasn’t he touching me anymore?! Had he suddenly lost interest? Did I do anything to scare him off? Had he suddenly realized he was straight? I was curious to know what was happening behind me. So I moved my head oh-so-slowly around to peep at him. And lo and behold, this dude was lubricating his finger with his saliva. Ehn?! Something about watching him dip his forefinger repeatedly into his mouth began to move me out of my entranced horniness. This guy was sha serious o! So he was looking to finger me, eh? And then what was next? A boinking session? On this bed right next to eight other guys?

This can’t happen! Not like this! If I that finger anywhere near my anal orifice, there’d be no stopping a headlong rush to sex. And that just couldn’t happen. Not in this hostel! And definitely not in this room, at this hour, on this bed!

So I stirred. I stirred and stretched, like I’d just woken up. I could feel him freeze up beside me, as I casually pulled my shorts back up. Then I moved about as far away as I could from him without ending up on the floor on my other side. He turned to his other side as well, away from me. And for the rest of the night, we didn’t so much as breathe in the same oxygen; not like I was able to get back to sleep anyway.

The next morning, away from the hearing of our roommates, I confronted him with what he’d done to me. And his response was: “You mean say na you I dey touch for night?” This was accompanied by a poor attempt at bewilderment on his face.

I didn’t know what I expected him to say to me, but it certainly wasn’t this Van Vicker act. I mean, seriously! A little annoyed, I snapped, “You’re asking me that after I just told you that you touched me?!”

“Ah, I think say na my babe. Sorry o. We do anything?”

Really?! You’re actually asking me that and expecting a reply?! I gave him an incredulous look.

And that was the end of our relationship as close friends. I really didn’t want things between us to end on the note it did, but since he was going to be a jackass about it, then I didn’t mind the writing-off of that chapter. We were cool with being the ‘hello-hi’ sort of roomies until he left the room, moving out to a lodge off-campus.

Written by Delle

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  1. Mandy
    January 14, 06:28 Reply

    Damn! This KCee is one heck of a risk taker. So if to say you leave am, that’s how he’ll ‘sleep’-fuck you, eh?

    • Delle
      January 14, 10:15 Reply

      The truth is I don’t know if I’d have had the will to stop him then…it’s a scary thought really and that’s cos our chances of getting caught, had we eventually copulated, were really high!

    • Marc Francis of Chelsea
      January 14, 11:02 Reply

      Your story reminds me of my boarding house days lol. A guy sat on my bunk and started feeling me up and I waited for him to go far then turned and when I saw it was my SEXY room head, I said
      “let’s go to the box room.” We had a swell time.

      On another occasion same thing happened and when I saw it was a loser I had no interest in cos he bullied me, I said “if you don’t leave here now I will scream and disgrace you.” Never touched me again.

  2. bruno
    January 14, 06:41 Reply

    lol. this story is so familiar it’s something of a cliché. supposedly straight acquaintance spends the night and starts getting frisky. things naturally turn awkward in daylight and the relationship pretty much changes permanently. happened to me a couple of times in uni too.

    these guys are poster boys for internalised homophobia.

    …and ten of you in a room?! our government is really failing us.

    • Kenny
      January 14, 06:55 Reply

      Most federal universities are like that O Bruno. They care not about the welfare of the students.

  3. ken
    January 14, 06:47 Reply

    A certain tribe in nigeria is very well known for this sort of behaviour- deep internalized homophobia. The most annoying part is that they are often the cutest and well endowed. Smh

    I love the way the story ended tho. It would have been so disappointing if the sex actually happened!

    • ambivalentone
      January 14, 07:00 Reply

      Speak for urself. All those muted grunts and muffled moans and darting eyes would av bin d perfect conclusion.
      And whats with u n being tribal eh kwa?

      • Mandy
        January 14, 07:20 Reply

        Me sef taya. Ken, why do u get so hopped up on tribal issues when it comes to sexuality. Aren’t you too educated for these prejudices?

    • Henrie
      January 14, 07:38 Reply

      Was that tribal dig actually necessary or you deliberately wanted to ruffle feathers?

    • ken
      January 14, 07:42 Reply

      Ladies. Puh-leeeese…..

      This is my opinion. I am speaking for mysef from personal experiences. So stop the nagging already!

      • Max 2.0
        January 14, 08:23 Reply

        Yeah the “opinion flag” usually waved when people are making nonsensical comments.

  4. Kenny
    January 14, 06:54 Reply

    Guys like Kcee for whatever reason are always many on campus. Touching you inappropriately and sending mixed signals only to later throw their supposed ‘straightness’ in your face. I avoid them like the plague.

    • Henrie
      January 14, 07:37 Reply

      I just don’t take them seriously. I had quite a number as pals in school. I think they all knew i wasn’t straight.

  5. tarter
    January 14, 07:04 Reply

    i couldn’t stay in the hostel, too much testosterone, and the bathroom is communal,i can’t begin my day by staring at gorgeous nude big pricks and firm asses,i won’t concentrate,so i jejely respected and got my own place, na who them won kill with hotness.

    • Henrie
      January 14, 07:41 Reply

      I tire o. My three weeks in Nysc camp was hell. Continuously being plagued by hotness i couldn’t feel wasn’t an easy sontin o.

  6. Jamie
    January 14, 07:10 Reply

    You served him the rightful drink, and in the right container. If you’d let him have his way that night, who’s sure that he’d have been any different from what he turned out at day? You’re not a log of wood/sex toy na.

  7. THE ANONYMOUS NIGGA
    January 14, 07:18 Reply

    Climax – anti climax. I know his kind. Eaten a few for breakfast myself. *firstComment*

  8. Teflondon
    January 14, 07:27 Reply

    I know it’s early days in the year 2016 but I think this is a strong contender for lamest post of the year. Perhaps?
    This story did nothing for me. It wasn’t interesting, I didn’t learn anything, I sure wasn’t aroused. And trust me it had nothing to do with the writer. It’s just the story. Poorly thought and served. You know one of those stories were the headline is catchy and you go on to read it and then half way through the read, you realize you have wasted some minutes of your life but just have to finish because of the time you have already invested in reading it up to that point. I couldn’t wait for the story to just end.
    I get this is a kiddies rant but even at that it more or less felt like it was written by a ‘poor mans kizito’

    • #Chestnut
      January 14, 07:32 Reply

      Why didn’t u enjoy d story Tef? Because there was no fucking at d end?

      • Mandy
        January 14, 07:34 Reply

        Who is he kidding? Abeg he saw Delle’s name and decided, “Today, satan, today please.”

    • Henrie
      January 14, 07:44 Reply

      Beesh please!! Make we hear word. If you’re looking for something to learn from go effing buy a school textbook!

    • #TeamKizito
      January 14, 08:13 Reply

      Poor mans Kizito? Thief, was that shade? :s

      It is shade. Yee! My eyes. Wharapun to my eyes! Thief, my eyes!

      • Teflondon
        January 14, 10:24 Reply

        It was actually a compliment to you.
        E.g Calling Sean Tizzle a ‘Poor Man’s Davido’ i.e looks like something or someone but not upto the standard of that thing or person.
        comprendre?
        But of course you wouldn’t believe the big bad Tef would ever compliment. trust me i understand the complex.

    • ikhines
      January 14, 08:49 Reply

      I agree Tef! This is the type of story you forget 30secs after reading…

    • Crea
      January 14, 08:58 Reply

      the story was lame as your comment 🤔

    • keredim
      January 14, 09:10 Reply

      Lame or not, at least it is HIS story…..?

    • Max 2.0
      January 14, 09:27 Reply

      You weren’t aroused? Seriously? Is that what you come here to look for? “Getting high on people’s stories”?
      There are tons of erotic materials (novels, texts and articles) online. Try making use of google once in a while.

      • Keredim
        January 14, 09:36 Reply

        Don’t you need to see your dick first, before you can tell you were aroused??

        • Max 2.0
          January 14, 10:00 Reply

          Hahahahahahaha ???? its too early for this Na, chai. You people are not nice at all. Hell awaits you @Keredim

      • Teflondon
        January 14, 10:08 Reply

        Max don’t be stupid.. there are tons of write ups people post on KD that get people’s ‘willy’ up. I’m not the one always drooling in the comment section of different peoples sexual tryst posted here. Go check for yourself and stop being a pretentious F**k.

        Moreover some of us actually have awesome sexual life (something that might be foreign to you) i don’t need no Online publication or boring sexual stories to give me satisfaction.

        “There are tons of erotic materials (novels, texts and articles) online. Try making use of google once in a while.” ??

        I have always wondered; since you are #TeamNoSexWithoutDating (and we all know how hard it is to date you from your MUMU rules) how you have been able to survive your boring sexual life. Well No guesses you have engrossed yourself in years of research on online porn and erotic stories to survive. #Perv

        • Max 2.0
          January 14, 11:46 Reply

          But seriously @RatchetMushin you really need to get tested.. Don’t even wanna imagine what they’re gonna find ???

    • Delle
      January 14, 10:23 Reply

      Last I checked, I wrote no erotica. Is this how flimsy your libido is as to get turned on by even the least arousing post? So the only prerequisite to your enjoying a read is if your thumb-like pecker gets outstretched? Amazing how daft you always sound, proudly so. Well too bad the post didn’t do all those perverted things for you, I’d have slapped myself if you had said something positive, I hate Hippos and not just cos they are ugly and more deadly, they are fat and remind me of you all the time!

      Get yourself a job real quick cos your reign here as DUMBEST KDIAN is not paying at all!
      Bye now

    • lonz
      January 16, 00:39 Reply

      Chimoo, what is it with tef. If it did nothing for you shutup and move on. Be making enemies up and down.

  9. #Chestnut
    January 14, 07:28 Reply

    Hilarious! His gf must be really-flated chested,if after playing with ur nipples,he still thought it was his gf he was stroking upandan like a banjo. Hahaha…I can’t deal biko. And he’s d kind of guy that would brag to anyone that cares to listen,that he can’t have sam smith’s songs on his fone? Who ask u? Shior!

    • Pink Panther
      January 14, 07:30 Reply

      ‘stroking nipples upandan like a banjo.’
      Hahahahahahahahahahaa!!! Today, laff will kee me.

    • Vhar.
      January 14, 08:31 Reply

      Excuse me The Vhar-gency, could you explain what is going on here, please?

      • Pink Panther
        January 14, 08:43 Reply

        Hahahahahahahaa!!! Vhar, apparently you have a fan club. Revel in it, darling. Revel.

        • Vhar.
          January 14, 08:51 Reply

          Fans ke? From where na?

    • Eros
      January 14, 12:05 Reply

      Vhar-gency???

      *clutches pearls*

  10. Dickson Clement
    January 14, 08:08 Reply

    Why do I feel the location of this story is UNN, maybe because I was there. You are bold Delle. You even let him go far with you while trying to discover his intents. What if you had lost it… and the both of you went 50 shades of fuckery? I don’t think you should have cross examined him?

    • Delle
      January 14, 10:12 Reply

      Hmm…Crystal ball someborri or maybe a lucky guess, no?

    • Chandler B.
      January 14, 12:57 Reply

      Aswear I also tot it was UNN. The cooking in front of your room; room numberings on the top of the door; sleeping arrangement with the never ending squatters- are all pointers to UNN’s hostel living conditions.

      • Kenny
        January 14, 19:52 Reply

        Doesn’t count. Most federal university hostels are like that.

    • michael
      January 15, 11:02 Reply

      Me too.. That their hostel is a hell hole..?

  11. Max 2.0
    January 14, 08:09 Reply

    “Ah, I think say na my babe. Sorry o. We do anything?”
    You think sey Na your babe abi? Oya chili ise!. What rubbish?. Straight(or are they?) men can lie for Africa and America combined. I’ve had experiences like this… They always pretend like nothing happened in the morning. But this your guy get mind oh, hmmm. He went too far with the attempted fingering.

    Its a good thing you got rid of him in your life.

  12. Tamara
    January 14, 08:22 Reply

    ‘ Stroking nipples up and down like a banjo’ damn! That got me. Thumbs up Delle, what a way to start off the day, #these *straigys* aint loyal, smh#

  13. CG
    January 14, 08:29 Reply

    Very typical of these sanctimonious hypocrite that call themselves straight

  14. Francis
    January 14, 08:30 Reply

    Delle congrats on your first post. It was beautiful and funny. ??? These encounters never end well. Me and my cousin don’t speak till date after he pulled this stunt as kids though i didn’t confront him sha.

    P.S: Hope say nobdoy bin dey cough for that una room for more than 3 weeks? TB full Naija oh. Lol

    • Delle
      January 14, 11:21 Reply

      Thank you dearie! I’d always hold you close 2 my heart! *kisses and smooches*

  15. The Vhar-gency.
    January 14, 09:05 Reply

    We’re a group of friends who, overtime, have come to admire His Royal Writer, Vhar.

    His work.

    His beautiful mind.

    He’s a god.

    We’re here to stay. And we’ll be on the lookout for trolls and the ignorant.

    • Vhar.
      January 14, 09:51 Reply

      Whomever you guys are, I should be flattered. Really, I should be but I’m not. I find this creepy.

      For the admiration and all, thank you but I’m no god. You have no perspicacious knowledge about me.

      I don’t need fans.
      I don’t need anyone fighting my “internet battles”.

      Leave the trolls and ignorant alone. We all have a role to play.

      If you’re looking for relevance and popularity, I don’t think your pseudonym should be affiliated with an already existing one.

      Don’t be a bovine lummox.

      Enjoy.

      • Brian Collins
        January 14, 12:38 Reply

        I very much found this in bad taste. Simple, pls change your pseudo or I don’t like that it has something to do with mine woulda passed the message. Which one was now “if you are looking for popularity and bla bla bla” ? And then referring to them as Bovine Lummox?
        Not cool at all.
        Someone has been MM’s bae, another Delle’s bae, another Khaleesi’s King or so.

      • Keredim
        January 14, 14:41 Reply

        …and just like that an unsolicited good intention is decimated. Shot down midway through take off…Just like that ??

        • Francis
          January 14, 14:49 Reply

          Nna eh, I just siddon dey wonder which offense Vhar-gency commit.

          • Keredim
            January 14, 16:04 Reply

            Francis nwanna, sometimes e no good to drink another person Panadol for a perceived headache.?

            I beg shift small make I follow you siddon look?

        • posh6666
          January 14, 16:10 Reply

          Yea sometimes having good intentions isnt just enough.Not too long ago you Keredim misunderstood an innocent comment i made which was so totally not about you for which i still apologised,what did you do?you were rude and gave me attitude after which i told you fuck you.Yes thats how it feels having ur good intentions turned into thrash

          • Keredim
            January 14, 17:04 Reply

            I am really not sure I follow.?

  16. posh6666
    January 14, 09:33 Reply

    Delle are you the guy on facebook with an igbo name? Because I am very very sure I have read this same exact story on facebook so please cclarify.Also the guy that wrote the story is definitely older than 18yrs fair in complexion I just want to be sure this isnt the case of plagiarism.Thanks

    • #Chestnut
      January 14, 09:51 Reply

      O seti go…#WorldPeople dem. *looks for comfortable spot and spreads mat*

    • Max 2.0
      January 14, 10:04 Reply

      @Deola, your barrow of pop corn is needed badly. @Chestnut, pass me the coffee mug.. This should be interesting.

    • Delle
      January 14, 10:06 Reply

      Yes Posh, it’s the same me. Thanks for the concern…muah!

      • posh6666
        January 14, 10:16 Reply

        Oh ok good but please how old are you exactly? Cos kdians think you are like 17-18 myself included but that guy on facebook looks grown atleast nothing less than 22-24

        • Delle
          January 14, 10:26 Reply

          Lol, m 19 going on 20 and if I look that old, thanks.
          Don’t worry, it’s the same me…PP can attest to that.

          • posh6666
            January 14, 10:33 Reply

            Its all good just wanted to clarify tnx.I’m actually one of ur avid readers on facebook you write so well and very creative too.I have always wondered who the guy was and why he has never penned down any article on kd.

            • Delle
              January 14, 11:26 Reply

              Aww thank you dearie. Apparently, I send only a few of them to PP, I’d try sending more.

              OAN
              I wish I could actually unravel the face behind Posh666…u could send me an inbox since you clearly know my fb ID…waddya say? *smirks*

  17. Keredim
    January 14, 09:45 Reply

    @Vhar- gency, it was a funny story with well placed one liners.

    Very entertaining.

    I have two concerns though:

    1) 10 people in a room in Uni?!! How big is this room? Like Francis said, ease of disease spreading.

    2) Kcee wanting to finger a bum at night. How clean was this bum going to be? He could have dug up something. (But I guess it’s the writer’s prerogative)

    Well done Delle??????

    • Delle
      January 14, 10:10 Reply

      My dear, the dilapidated state of most federal schools in Nigeria is alarming. There are rooms with 16 occupants and only 5 mattresses but with a school that has only 2 male hostels, what do u expect? It’s terrible really

    • Max 2.0
      January 14, 10:12 Reply

      ???Tufia GI.. You’re the worst on this blog . ??????. Even worse than chest nut.

      • Keredim
        January 14, 12:40 Reply

        @Max!! Ogini? Gini ka mere nau??????

  18. Khaleesi
    January 14, 10:43 Reply

    lool … memories, I remember my time in the hostel in Uni, at some point i also had a touchy – feely – gropy roommate who’s hands roamed all over me at night, but for some weird reason, I wasn’t all that into him so I put a stop to it … memories …

  19. Alves
    January 14, 10:56 Reply

    I have a friend like that, who loves to cuddle and call me some kind sweet-sweet names. Then ‘Cristiano might be gay’ comes up, and he remembers his straight cannons.

  20. simba
    January 14, 11:18 Reply

    Delle, I read this with rapt attention dear.. but hmmmm no sex, even at a later date?? Ohhhh sad… Posh dear, hmmmm ain’t u too harsh to ur fans… Nigeria Universities,luckily no epidemic outbreak it ‘ll kill hundreds in hours

    • posh6666
      January 14, 11:24 Reply

      Lol simba like i said i was only trying to clarify things.He’s a very good writer from all his writeups on facebook which i always look forward to reading,just a pity he had to go for sciences.Teflondon was guilty of plagiarism one time and he shamelessly claimed credit.

      • Mandy
        January 14, 11:31 Reply

        ‘shamelessly claimed credit’. Lol. Some things can never be forgotten on KD.

      • Mandy
        January 14, 11:33 Reply

        LMAO. WS, you too? So you’ve been inducted into Keredim’s club of brutal sarcasm.

        • Wayfaring Stranger
          January 14, 12:16 Reply

          I don’t think I have. I was only clarifying for him; I don’t encourage meanness. ?

  21. Wayfaring Stranger
    January 14, 11:24 Reply

    Is this something that happened recently? I didn’t know people still did this. Thought it ended at boarding houses in high schools.

    • Delle
      January 14, 11:30 Reply

      Lol…it actually happened 2 years ago and like they say, old habits don’t die.
      The boarders that do that would very well bring it into the tertiary institutions. I was never a boarder anyway…

  22. sinnex
    January 14, 11:47 Reply

    This is nice. I missed a lot. I can’t believe I passed through Secondary School , University and NYSC without experimenting. Now, i am chasing after those guys who kept on asking me out in Secondary School, unfortunately they are straight as fuck and don’t remember anything.

    Delle, i am looking forward to more of your stories.

  23. kacee
    January 14, 11:51 Reply

    I feel like cutting that dick’s finger, na God save him sha. Can u imagine someone touching my baby’s ass, sorry MM, Delle is my baby. mtchewww.

    • Brian Collins
      January 14, 18:27 Reply

      Ehn ehn Kacee, so only you was MM’s Bae and then Delle’s Bae? I don see you finish o.

  24. Dickson Clement
    January 14, 12:05 Reply

    Mehn! A lot of bitter souls in the world. They spill their bitterness in the comment section. How do you guys unveil pple here???

    • KingBey
      January 14, 14:26 Reply

      Asineh ! It’s baffling. And I thought KD was an anonymous blog.

  25. Brian Collins
    January 14, 12:45 Reply

    Delle sweet, I see you oh. I was gonna tell you to take your ass over to his room off campus and make him beg you to let him fuck you. But two years is a long time sha.
    Nice one.

    • Delle
      January 14, 14:23 Reply

      So I wee now go and carri my sef and go and meet him in his room to seduce him into sexing me? Lol, Brian…ur imagination is HILARICAL!
      Well, I like my dignity and he just doesn’t read on my meter anyway…*winks*

  26. Lothario
    January 14, 13:58 Reply

    Oh Delle, good one! An experience worth having since he was a hunk, albeit one filled with stupidity, still a hunk nonetheless.

    Still, this will make good dinner party conversation someday. Just make sure you’re always on the safe side.

    • Delle
      January 14, 14:24 Reply

      Looking forward to that dinner party conversation though
      *resumes hair gelling*

  27. posh6666
    January 14, 18:48 Reply

    Pinky needs to stop this childish attitude who has the time to be going thru comments and deleting it? We are all adults here and should be able to receive it as much as we give it..Most of us are guilty of throwing jabs n shades at one another so not really a biggie people should just toughen up abeg life isnt fair afterall.

    • Pink Panther
      January 14, 18:57 Reply

      You know, you can rave and rant from now till His Kingdom comes, you can lecture me about everything you think I should do or shouldn’t do, salting your reprimand with insults in between…

      But at this stage in our acquaintanceship with each other here on KD, haven’t you learned that I’ll do what’s on my mind to do?

      And kindly stop making this about you. My actions today weren’t about you or any other peeps who’ll no doubt come after me. It’s not. I simply realized (albeit too late) that the comment bearing Delle’s identity should not have been left here for the obnoxious KDians to delight in. Delle is not my friend, for those who are ready to pounce on the misconception that I’m all about my friends on KD. He is simply someone who made a mistake that I decided to correct. If your comments got in the way of that correction, too bad. Deal with it and move on.

      • ikhines
        January 14, 21:19 Reply

        Na you sabi… sha do quick and post while we were yet kids part 6. Oniranu!

      • Brian Collins
        January 15, 08:03 Reply

        Thank you Pinky, I would want those deletes too if I were Delle. Posh, take ya time o.

  28. Chizzie
    January 14, 18:56 Reply

    Was going to lol at someone’s mean but extremely hilarious comment but appaz its been deleted. So you know, whatever ?

  29. Wayfaring Stranger
    January 14, 19:01 Reply

    Put your own Facebook id so we can start another “rate his looks” thread beneath it.

  30. peaches
    January 14, 23:40 Reply

    This tory tuff walai!… and to think he was pretending to be sleep fucking his babe… the baboon. chai, Delle, why do God so luv these pple by taking them off my way way, me d daughter of eight mad pple, wen i finish dia bnk acct, an empty peak tin wld make less noise compared to it. *bites lips*

  31. TayBtm
    January 15, 00:15 Reply

    Im so happy i found dis 2day, I luv stories dat show how gay str8 pple really are, reminds me of one story chimamanda put on olisa tv dat I really like about one str8 boy and his gay friend and how dey fell in love, it was so lovely

  32. […] KCee would one day molest me as the other roommates slept at night, oblivious to the happenings in the room. The next day, I would confront him about it and his response would trigger the end. The end to all the nonsense going on. (This much I talked about in the story, THE STRAIGHT ROOMMATE) […]

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