“I Did It For The Money” And Those Other Excuses Given When Caught Acting All Gay
These days, a self-identified “straight” public figure will be caught acting rather, well, “gay.” Maintaining a Grindr profile, for instance. Soliciting sex in a public restroom. Or being snapped by paparazzi getting cozy with another dude on the beach. And when this occurs, you can bet the man who is caught, ahem, red handed, will quickly come up with an explanation (rationalization?) for the behavior.
Some excuses are more believable than others. Some are downright bizarro. But we’ll let you decide which ones are legit.
Check out these allegedly “straight” guys and the excuses they’ve made after being caught acting gay.
“I did it for the money”: Paul Canon and his gay-for-pay adult film careerThe gay-for-pay adult film actor “came out” to his family earlier this year during a trip home to discuss his career for a Broke Straight Boys produced reality series.
Dressed in a black t-shirt that read “I’m not gay, but $1000 is $1000,” the 22-year-old said: “I really don’t care about defining my own sexuality. At this point now, I don’t like labels, I can’t stand labels.”
Then he said he was sexually attracted to women.
His family, however, was not convinced. Canon’s father said he believed his son was gay. His two brothers agreed, saying they always felt he preferred men to women.
Eventually, Canon caved. Sort of. He said okay, maybe he liked guys, but he also liked girls.
“I guess I would be considered bisexual,” he meditated. “The reason I don’t like labels like that is bisexuality has this negative connotation of being confused, and I’m definitely not confused. I mean, I know what I like. I definitely find women attractive, but then there’s certain aspects of men that I find attractive.”
What can we say? Other than he’s 22.
“I’m being targeted because I’m a celebrity”: Aaron Rodgers and those “uncool” tweetsThe Green Bay Packers quarterback found himself at the center of gay rumors late last year when a number of now-deleted tweets from the Twitter account of Kevin Lanflisi, the man who worked as Rodgers’ “personal assistant” and lived in his home as “a roommate” for the several years, were unearthed by an internet spy. In addition to some rather dramatic language, the tweets included pictures of Rodgers and Lanflisi hanging out on the beach, road-tripping across California, and attending a Justin Bieber concert.
The whole incident prompted Rodgers to “come out” as “straight” on his Milwaukee radio program. “I’m just going to say I’m not gay,” Rodgers said on 540 WAUK-AM in Milwaukee. “I really, really like women. That’s all I can really say about that.”
He added that one of the downsides to stardom is “crazy rumors that swirl around you from time to time,” adding that the whole gay rumor thing was part of the “uncool” side of celebrity.
Really, Aaron? Really?
“Just Chatting”: Matt Moore and that totally innocent Grindr accountWhen it was discovered the “ex-gay” activist Matt Moore had a secret Grindr profile, the 25-year-old born-again Christian explained that “Basically I just wanted to see who was on it and who was around me. I can honestly say that I didn’t have any kind of sexual conversations with anyone. Anyone who sent me any kind of explicit photos or conversations, I blocked immediately.”
Did you catch that? He blocked them immediately. Since you really can’t block everyone on Grindr, we suggest he would have better luck deleting his profile.
“He was just a client”: Joe Simpson and male modelWhen pics of Joe Simpson and a 21-year-old dude frolicking on the beach together surfaced online last summer, the 56-year-old businessman tweeted: “More mis-information in the new [sic]. The guy in the pics is my modeling client. He was in Miami taking agency meetings. That’s it!!”
Hmmm. We don’t usually cavort on the beach with our clients, but hey as excuses go, it may not be the worst. At least he wasn’t on Grindr blocking peeps.
Of course, there is a broader context here. It wasn’t the first time gay rumors swirled around the former minister. In 2012, a 32-year-old gay male escort shared the alleged details of his three-hour, $600 love fest with Mr. Simpson, claiming his “insatiable appetite for sex…never really tired.”
Simpson never responded to those allegations. But he did divorce his wife of 35 years, Tina, shortly after.
“I was asleep”: Antoine Dodson and the Black Hebrew Israelite descendants of Judah
Last year, Internet-sensation Antoine Dodson said the reason he was gay in the past was because he had been “asleep,” but now he was “awakened.” Not only that, but he was also “the True Chosen Hebrew Israelite descendant of Judah.”
“I have to renounce myself,” he said in a statement. “I’m no longer into homosexuality. I have been awakened by the great and so should you. Let’s be delivered from the wickedness of the world and live the way we should. The Most High bless all and have a beautiful evening. Israel wake up and take full power of who you are. I’m ready are you?”
What can we really say to that one?
“Mistaken gender identity”: Brett Ratner and the man he didn’t know was a manIn 2007, the Hollywood director/producer, who has a history of saying really stupid things, confessed that he once messed around with a guy. While promoting his film Rush Hour 3, Ratner said a BJ scene in the movie was inspired by his own experience.
“My first blow job was from a man, but I didn’t know it was a man,” he said. “It happens to a lot of people.”
Since Ratner “didn’t know” the person performing fellatio on him was a man, this means it doesn’t count as gay, naturally.
“Just payin’ off my debt”: Cathal McCarron and that gambling addictionThe Irish footballer made international headlines in April when video of him getting banged by another dude surfaced on an adult website.
After the footage emerged, 25-year-old McCarron went into hiding, deleting his Facebook and Twitter accounts and checking into rehab in the Irish countryside.
Though he’s never spoken publicly about the video, McCarron’s allies say he did the film only to pay off debts acquired from his gambling addiction.
“Everyone is shocked and stunned,” a former neighbor said at the time of the scandal. “No one can believe it and everyone is devastated for him. It’s a very sad story for Cathal. He’s had so many issues and he must be in a very bad place. We all hope he can pull through this.”
“I was drunk”: Ben Hobson and those pesky bipolar genesRemember the married father of two who had everyone in tears when he shared his emotional coming out story in May of this year? (Click HERE to read about it) Well, in October, he backtracked, writing on his Facebook page: “I ‘fooled around’ with a guy while drunk a year ago and thought that meant I MUST be gay. Turns out my judgement was wrong. My mom must’ve passed down her bipolar genes onto me, but to a whole other level.”
A lapse in judgement as a result of inebriation and bipolar genes inherited from his suicidal mother. Classy.
“It’s not what it looked like”: Kerry Rhodes and his young male “assistant”The former NFL star found himself at the center of gay rumors when shirtless photographs of him getting cozy with another man on the beach appeared online earlier this year.
Rhodes told TMZ it wasn’t what it looked like. “Photos have been circulating of my former assistant and I that have caused some rumors regarding my sexuality, and I want to address the situation,” he said. “I am not gay.”
But shortly after that, video of Rhodes half-naked and rolling around in bed with his “assistant” popped up online. It has since been deleted, but there are still plenty of screenshots floating around.
After the footage was released, a mysterious text message sent by Rhodes to an anonymous friend “leaked” to the media. In it, he alleged that he might be the father of Kim Kardashian’s baby.
“Man this could be my baby!!” the text read. “I was f*cking her the same time as K.West was lol!!!”
So, obviously, this means he’s definitely 100 percent straight, right?
“The wide stance”: Larry Craig and the false confessionThe former Republican Senator from Idaho made national headlines in 2007 when he was arrested at the Minneapolis-St. Paul International Airport on suspicion of lewd conduct after allegedly soliciting an undercover male cop for sex by tapping the man’s shoe under a stall in a bathroom.
Craig told investigators he hadn’t meant to tap the officer’s shoe, blaming the foot rubbing on his “wide stance.”
“I’m a fairly wide guy,” he said.
But authorities weren’t convinced.
After pleading guilty in court, Craig held a press conference to say that, even though he had pled guilty, he wasn’t really guilty. “I am not gay,” he said. “I never have been gay… In June, I overreacted and made a poor decision. I chose to plead guilty to a lesser charge in hopes of making it go away… Please let me apologize to my family, friends and staff and fellow Idahoans for the cloud placed over Idaho. I did nothing wrong at the Minneapolis airport. I did nothing wrong, and I regret the decision to plead guilty and the sadness that decision has brought on my wife, on my family, friends, staff and fellow Idahoans.”
Needless to say, he’s not in politics anymore.
Anyone else remember some particularly creative rationalizations? Let the world know in the comments section. 🙂
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40 Comments
Vhar.
December 16, 04:25“A werewolf tossed me against a giant packing crate while I was trying to rescue a frightened young girl who’d been kidnapped by an evil witch and a drug lord.”
Y’all love dicks or beef cakes or mouth holes…
You want to say the truth? kick the crutch out from under your excuses.
Especially that NFL player and his assistant (kinda reminds me of Kal and Tariq from L.A Complex).
AgamaEyzOnYeu.
Masked Man
December 16, 04:34Kerry Rhodes is one sexy hunk. Won’t mind some chocolate rolling on my bed this dawn of a new day.
Dennis Macauley
December 16, 05:06The Senator from Idaho cracked me up when I saw it on E! A while back! And he built his campaign around being “family friendly” (whatever that means) and was a vocal critic of gay marriage! If you check the dictionary for the word hypocrite, im sure there will be a picture of him smiling!
Then the “Born again christian” (***rolls eyes from portharcourt to pakistan***) Ex-gay grindr user is quite hilarious! But we do know people like that who “repent’ (holds laff) from the “sin of homosexuality” but still likes their meat sausage!
LOL
JustJames
December 16, 06:08I prefer to give people the benefit of the doubt the first time… but most of the people here are just confused or lying to themselves. I think the ones that had gay sex for money are bi. I’m pretty sure you can’t convince a straight person to have gay sex.
Lord II
December 16, 06:46I hate to bust your bubbles James luv but that’s not true. Some have met and convinced some very str8t but also very naive pipo to do d deed and succeeded…!!! Yes some of em stayed doing the game but yet some left after their naivety left them!!
Khaleesi
December 16, 08:31***rolls eyes*** those guys are not straight! ! They just never knew they had a bisexual side! A straight man CANNOT even if he really wants to, have sex with another man … he just isnt wired that way and hos body just wont cooperate … knowing you, the guys you talk about were probably coerced and induced to discover their gay sides … some continued cos they got more comfortable with their bisexuality while others withdrew to their previous states as they could not handle their guilt/confusion issues …
Lord II
December 16, 13:06And one would think with all the “intelligence” you seem to be showing here you would at least be aware that just as NATURAL gays have sex with LADIES so NATURAL stra8ts can to…am surprised at you….and am sure you are one of em that just love labels…well newsflash luv….some you just CAN’T and DONT LABEL!!! they are here and there and if you like call em “confused” oh whatever…they just do it with men as well as with gals…
chestnut
December 16, 06:43Wait o, Jessica Simpson’s father is “doing” too? Lobatan!
I don’t know why ppl keep deceiving themselves: now I’m not even exactly talking about the “real” celebs,who have to protect their identity, but d attention-seeking ‘nobodys'( born-again Ex-gays); wetin carry u go grindr? U want to preach to them and turn them into “ex-gays” too? That boy knows that there are only TWO things that can happen to u on grindr *sips tea*…
I’m still mad at Kerry Rhodes for messing with that loud-mouth gremlin that splashed his story all over. I mean,u’re soooo fucking hot,if u’re goin to be outed by someone u’ve been fucking,at least let it be someone equally hot,not someone that looks like d ghetto version of a garden-gnome! I hated seeing pics of them getting cozy together…so mis-matcehd!
Absalom
December 16, 06:47“I’m not gay; my friend converted me.”
– Random Nigerian homosexual
pinkpanthertb
December 16, 06:51Hahahahahaaa. True that.
Or
‘I’m not gay because i can quit this game anytime i like.’
lluvmua
December 16, 06:55I swear am not gay. was just walking along the road and I fell on a dick. *BItch plz* *rolls eyes from ph to newyork* #dennis I am ph ooooo for d umpteenth time. ok
chestnut
December 16, 07:03Lol. iluvmua,so u’re one of d ppl giving Mrs M sleepless nights on dis blog,ehn? She has plans for y’all o!(go and read yesterday’s posts muahahaha)
Brian Collins
December 16, 08:15I was just gonna say the same thing o. Mrs M just say the word and a lot of things would happen to iluvmua this weekend.
Ps: I think I live in PH too. As a matter of fact sef I don’t know where I live.
lluvmua
December 16, 09:55ROTFLMAO sleepless nights? lol
Mrs Macaulay
December 16, 08:17***stirs tea***
Walking around in heels, certain BBM messages are being deleted without being read!
Chestnut Boo, don’t you love the harmattan?
Samaurai
December 16, 09:00Lol.
Mrs M, biko what is the content of this particular tea you guys are always stirring and drinking on KD?
I’ve asked Pinky and he isn’t forth-coming at all.
pinkpanthertb
December 16, 09:23😀 *blows gently over my steaming cup of tea and takes a sip*
Mrs Macaulay
December 16, 09:44@Pink Panther Sweetheart do you wanna try this blend? It’s from grenada!
***pours pinky a cup, smiles @ samurai***
lluvmua
December 16, 09:52lol dont be scared , calm down mrs m. I mean no harm jawe haba! just came for a cup of tea too lol. #I saw wah u did dia ooo continu there is God in every fin we re doing.
chestnut
December 16, 10:30Hahaha…d harmattan is great; perfect tea-drinking weather! *grin*
Mrs Macaulay
December 16, 11:04@Iluvmua
***claps hand***
Dennis is not in portharcourt atm!
Oya rest!!!
Hian***
Airdeecan
December 17, 01:19My dear I tire oooooo, to meet person na by force?, your relentless pursuit of d guy is getting rather pathetic…..its not like y’all are already friends or something…..free person jare.
FKA Chizzie
December 16, 07:13Ha I was right about that Ben Hobson guy..eventhough everyone thought that as usual I was being mean… rme
Deola
December 16, 07:40Ben Hobson is really gthe Most disappointing one here, mostly because I connected with his story, a gay guy finally come to terms with his sexuality and takes a bold step by telling his wife and decides to stop living a lie.
That takes huge balls and I respected the guy. Well it seemed all sweet, and he really did seem like a sweet guy especially with his 2 adorable kids.
I guess it was too good to be true and he seems like an attention seeker, and now he is bipolar. Well talk,about losing all your credibility.
All I think of is what to yeye bros has put his family through, that poor wife that has to deal with his hot mess, bless her heart.
pinkpanthertb
December 16, 09:19Youre right. When i read the report that he was recanting his coming out, i was all sorts of disappointed.
Mrs Macaulay
December 16, 09:47I remember when you posted it and some people doubted his motives, you and Dennis and others took them to the cleaners!
Can I say they have been vindicated!
Tea or coffee sweatheart?
pinkpanthertb
December 16, 10:29*scowling at Mrs. M* No i think ill have vinegar.
Mrs Macaulay
December 16, 12:12Vinegar coming up!
Dennis Macauley
December 16, 12:17***tip toes past***
lluvmua
December 16, 09:56@brian collins plz msg me or collect my contacts frm pinkie. we do have a lot to talk about. #stirs cofee
FKA Chizzie
December 16, 11:20someone give this child a dildo pls
Max
December 16, 11:41Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha..
May I suggest a 9″ black one pls..
Dennis Macauley
December 16, 12:13***ROTFL***
This is actually funny!
lluvmua
December 16, 17:24lol @ chizzie I would love to share your dildo wif u if u dnt mind lmaoooo
Airdeecan
December 17, 01:21I love you Chizzie……
Arabian Princess
December 16, 11:16a secondary school mate once told me: “I’m not gay, I just love ass”. two weeks later, he was dickmatized by my ex.
many are just hypocritical. my firstie added me up yesterday night. He told me he’s not gay cos he managed to impregnate a girl after secondary school and now has a kid. imagine my surprise when he asked if I still do “that stuff” and wanted pictures of my d!¿k and a$$. I deleted him immediately. never again will I be a specimen for experiment
Dennis Macauley
December 16, 12:15Firstie?
I am so out of touch with pop culture
#LamentationsOfAnOldMan
***sigh***
gad
December 16, 12:33Why all these denials. What’s wrong with being gay or bisexual? Is there something I’m yet to be aware of?
victor
December 17, 15:59Antoine dodson though? Hahahahahahaha. If only he could make his natural bitchiness go away, hell yeah,I am not gay too
Pedro Mann (@D1kPedro)
December 19, 12:44Front only; Back only; Front and back. …