RANTINGS OF A RANDOM (Gay) NIGERIAN (Entry 15)

RANTINGS OF A RANDOM (Gay) NIGERIAN (Entry 15)

A friend of mine had a very terrible kito situation recently; it involved some young guy who came over to his apartment for a night-over and left with some valuable stuff in the morning. My friend tracked him down to Uniport to ask for his stuff back (the tablet that was stolen was company property). Anyway, it got really messy and the police was involved and all, and eventually my friend parted with some money (a lot of money actually) to bury the matter. Anyway, after this unfortunate experience, he told me he was “quitting being gay.” I asked him if it was a switch that can be turned off and on, and he said that yes the feelings won’t go away, but he would no longer be involved with men,

“What has this thing fetched me Dennis? All troubles… I had an extra year in school… I eventually graduated with a Third Class… To get a job was war… Kito left, right and centre… Abeg, I am out!”

Now I wanted to point out that the setbacks he had were because he made poor choices which did not necessarily have to do with him being gay, but I held my peace, seeing as he was in pain. Eventually I told him to look at my life; I am gay too, but I was a stellar student who set a departmental record upon graduation (can I brag a little please, guys?). I don’t stumble into one kito after the other. It all comes down to making sensible choices in life. In the end, I told him if this thing he was going to do was going to make him happy, I’d support him 100 percent, because at the end of the day, I just want him to be happy and satisfied.

He started his journey, found solace in a particular church which he threw himself into and he was making progress on his journey, or so it seemed to me. We were still friends and I supported his choices, even though I didn’t think much of them. When our mutual friends placed bets that he wouldn’t last three months without shagging a guy, I reprimanded them, reminding them that if this was what he means to do, then as his friends, we should be supportive.

Fast forward eight months later, another old friend of mine who lives in Abuja called me. (Let’s call him Eric)

Eric: Hey, sup with you, long time.

Me: Look what the cat dragged in. Where have you been?

Eric: I dey o. Work mata, school mata, man mata…

Me: lol. May man mata not kill you. So whats up?

Eric: You know when person wan marry, him go ask about the husband-to-be…

Me: Ehen, which unfortunate man wan marry you?

Eric: Your head there. Anyway, there is this guy on my case, and since he lives in porracort, I say make I ask the pitakwa lord whether you sabi am, whether e safe for me to chook head. I am sending you a photo now.

Let me save you the long gist. He sent the picture and – surprise, surprise – it was my repented friend. My other friends nearly died from laughter when I told them, shouting their ‘I told you so’. On my own, I felt sorry for him. Clearly he could not keep up the charade, and he did not want us to know, so he would not be laughed at. I decided not to bring it up, until he feels comfortable enough to tell me, and then I would let him know that you cannot run away from who you are. I have been down that road and it leads to nowhere.

*

I have been in Port Harcourt for a long time, and it is fun running into some people I knew way back. Now way back when I was younger, there were guys who did not give me the time of the day… you know, the kinds who avoided anyone not employed? When I was in university, we would chat on Yahoo Messenger and all, and connect very well, but the moment I mentioned I was a student, that was the end. They’d start avoiding me, and I was in a dilemma because I always dated younger or older (never my age mates). So the younger ones would hear ‘student’ and move on (clearly this one cannot buy me expensive stuff), and the older ones would hear ‘student’ and run away (this one is looking for someone to sponge off), even though as the youngest kid in my family, I lacked nothing as a student. If I ever got broke, I’d call one of my seven other siblings and mention some fictitious textbook and – voila! – bank alert (don’t judge me, y’all did same). Anyway, it was always a herculean task to meet someone beyond fucking on the first date, but I figured school would soon be over and I’d be fine, right? Wrong. It continued into my NYSC and I served at the time when allowee was N9700, not now that corpers are balling with almost 20k.

After NYSC, I was at home for about two months before I landed my first job, and those two months felt like torture. The moment I mentioned to a guy that I was just out of service and unemployed, that message would be read and never replied. And sometimes, by the morning, he would be gone from my BBM.

So recently I ran into one of those guys at Port Harcourt mall (which is the place to go to if you are shopping for Uniport twinks; simply take a stroll to Mr Price upstairs and thank me later). I saw him pulling into the parking lot, while I was just getting out, and I pretended not to see him, until he called my name. He had doubled in size (tripled more like) and had squeezed himself into clothes he had when he was slim. I said hello to him briefly, and headed inside to pick up the stuff I wanted. I won’t lie though; it felt good to be the slim one and him the fat Albert.

At night, he swung into my whatsapp (surprise, surprise, he still had my number) and he started preaching about how he wanted us to be an item and how he missed an opportunity… yada, yada, yada…*rolls eyes*. Eventually I asked him what was different now, seeing as he did not want me back then. What was different about me now? He went on about how better looking I was and how I had matured. I told him that was bullshit.

“You think,” I replied, “that now I have a job with financial independence, it will be nice, seeing as I won’t have to bother you for money or anything. lol. Anyway it’s great that I have the job and all, because now I have the power to choose, and you are not even close to what I would choose if I am tossed into the man-supermarket. Do have a good evening.”

Then I went ahead to block him, and that felt very good.

*

I do not understand people’s fascination with nude photos. And I don’t get how people actually take nude photos of themselves and store in their phones; like if your phone gets missing, what would you do about the mess? lol. I have been doing a lot of ‘online shopping’ (if you catch my drift), and I’m starting to get that this nude photos issue is always a biggie for some people. Naturally gay porn does not move me (I rarely watch it), and seeing pictures of naked men or naked body parts does not make me flip over. I have other perversions (which I shall not be writing about, thank you very much).

Anyway, so I was shopping on Hornet recently, and this guy sent me a message. Seeing as he was close to me, I replied, and soon we were chatting away. Eventually we moved to BBM and continued talking. I was getting a feel of his personality and was liking him. I had school work to get to, but I continued chatting with him. Naturally the conversation moved to sex and I was answering his questions as well as asking mine. Then suddenly he sent me a picture of his ass, and then another one and another one. I must confess, the dude was packing cushion; it was like two soft loaves of French bread.

Then, he asked for my own nude photos and I told him I did not have any. And he was like, “You mean you don’t have any saved on your phone?” And I said no. He asked me to snap one and send to him immediately, and I declined, saying I don’t send nude photos, adding that if we got along enough, he would eventually get a live feed. The guy flipped and started calling me names, that he sent me his nudes, why wouldn’t I send mine. I calmly reminded him that I did not ask for them, that he sent them out of the benevolence of his heart, and that I did not have such benevolence. A lot more cussing took place before I deleted his ass off my BBM, along with his photos.

So much ado about nude photos… *shaking my head*

I get that some people love seeing nude photos. I don’t get moved by them, but if you send me some, sure, I will view them (it will improve my blood circulation). Call me prudish, but I just cannot reciprocate the gesture.

*

On a final note, one consequence of writing this journal is that some of my friends now hide stuff from me, and some who previously confided in me no longer do so because they think whatever they tell me will be a journal entry. lol. Yes this journal is not fiction and some things that happen, I do write about, but I would never write about sensitive things that affect people that I care about.

A few days ago, some lovely individual came on to me via email from KD. He wanted us to be lovers and all, and then he said, “Please, if you turn me down, do not make a story about this, revealing my pseudonym, that I came on to you please.” I was offended by that statement. He must think so little of me for him to think that I’d do something as low as that to prove a point? In spite of what some people perceive me, I am a very warm and sensitive person and would never do something like that. So, no need to be paranoid.

That’s it for today, folks.

XOXO

DM

Previous That Piece About The Difference Between Fucking, Sex And Making Love
Next Carl’s Existentialism: Pilot Entry

About author

You might also like

Series (Non-Fiction) 17 Comments

THE QUESTION: CAN YOU BE DIFFERENT AND HAPPY? (Part 2)

“Happiness is the experience of joy, contentment, or positive well-being, combined with a sense that one’s life is good, meaningful, and worthwhile.” – Sonja Lyubomirsky The happiness question is one

Series (Non-Fiction) 44 Comments

Kiss And Tell (Entry 3)

I met Tony on Facebook. I liked him almost immediately. I guess this was because of his good looks. He is dark-complexioned, slim-waisted and slightly muscular with a broad chest

Series (Non-Fiction) 43 Comments

RANTINGS OF A RANDOM (Gay) NIGERIAN (Entry 49)

So I have this friend whom I shall call Emeka. We have been friends for ages; right from our days as bright eyed young kids on the university campus. After

98 Comments

  1. JArch
    April 29, 04:33 Reply

    All of you that want to send me back to the village by codedly going behind my back to toast my husband Dennis, my MFM prayers will catch una one by one. Be my lover ko… husband snatchers go and find your own ooo

      • Dennis Macaulay
        April 29, 05:57 Reply

        Jarch if you are conversant with Yoruba culture, you know there is the Oba who has an Erelu, then 2 or 3 Oloris and then the Orente Ayaba lol.

        So its allowed!!!

  2. shuga chocolata
    April 29, 05:01 Reply

    nice entry DM but to me you just did same by kinda writing about the KD dude. in all, nice entry.

    • Khaleesi
      April 29, 05:38 Reply

      @Shuga, nope this is different, he mentioned no names, dates or places so we’ll never have an idea of who’s referring to, it remains firmly between them both …

  3. Mirage
    April 29, 05:24 Reply

    As in I know yea PH dudes would be like “what do you do?” Without even asking your name&i told one I was a waiter at Genesis,off he went only for his friend to become my friend and he started the charade of the boy is mine after his friend told hun i wasn’t a waiter smh! And the guys who turned you down or ignored you messages wanting to become bestie fast forward 2 years, got that recently and I asked “what changed,my recent pix on fb got to you?” And he played apologetic part and I simply replied “I don’t do superficial friends,my friendship is deeply rooted,go get a life” and threw him off my list.Queers and love for materials things they can’t afford or work for!sorry for your friend sha next time he would be more careful,pass him my love.

    • Dennis Macaulay
      April 29, 05:56 Reply

      Mirage lol you have experienced it too.

      When they now consider you date-able, they begin to break down your door.

      The other day i told one guy i was an MSc student at uniport full time and he never said anything to me again. Eventually he found out I wasnt and starting hitting me up again and i curved him.

      Its funny because I mean I hang out with a lot of really young men and they are not all bad and looking for someone to sponge off!

      • Chris
        April 29, 06:33 Reply

        It is so annoying that i can testify in the affirmative to have experience the ‘what do you do for a living?”
        no sooner than you get into a conversation with a someone that i will still refer to as a stranger.
        May i be forgiven to say this is peculiar to us in Nigeria as i personally dont notice much of this in other climes. Anyway am not surprise, since it depict how shallow and materialistic we are in our beloveth
        country hence all the alarming social ills. What do you do for a living ko, who do you fuck for the day ni,
        let the relevant people here forgive my early momo ranting, sorry.

    • Mirage
      April 29, 07:55 Reply

      And I wanted to add,DM was wrong of you to have brought the guy who emailed you here.I know it’s tempting to wanna post here and wanna make everyone think you sort after but did you see it from the guys angle?though u didn’t post his pseudonym but bet you have made one enemy for yourself,I think you owe him an apology,if you were not interested politely turn him down and he even asked you not to post but you did,that’s childish,no?

      • shuga chocolata
        April 29, 10:32 Reply

        @MIRAGE thanks for also pointing out the call out, exactly what the dude begged you not to do.

        everyone is entitled to his own opinions, but I’m just stating you need to send a message to the dude and apologized, we all are gays and FAB just like a friend always says.though you didn’t mention name, venue, or time and date, it could have been you or me.

  4. Khaleesi
    April 29, 05:36 Reply

    Nice piece DM hun, i laugh each time i see persons who want to ‘stop being gay’, when will people learn that you can’t run away from who you truly are? I’ve seen such attempts fail sooo many times I’ve lost track. You may be able to resist the urge to sleep with men (for a while), but if you think the sexual urges are ever going away then you’re the worlds newest scholar in the faculty of self deceit!
    Smh @ the nude pic hoes; i also dont get lots of people’s obsessions with nudes. I have also often been chatting with guys who then proceed to send me nudes or ask for mine. I am extremely uncomfortable taking/sending my nudes – if however you send of your own volition, who am i to refuse?
    This was a great piece DM, muahhhhh!!!!

  5. chestnut
    April 29, 06:02 Reply

    Er…”Naturally, gay porn does not turn me on…”? No dear, I think u’re mistaking the word “naturally”, for the word “ironically”,lol.
    U’re a bigger man than I am, because I’d probably tease (lovingly,of course hehe) the prodigal ‘gay’ after he “came back”, and use d opportunity to have an ernest discussion about what u can and can’t change about urself. Funny enough, as soon as I started “practising”, never have I had an “oh,I’m turning straight from now onwards” phase. If some issues are getting to me,I’d just simply decide to “rest” and do me for a while,b4 going fishing again.

    I do have some semi-undressed pics on my fone, but I don’t show them to ppl who haven’t seen me without a shirt on b4…hehehe.
    Your would-be Kdian-email lover was prolly scared because of the way u casually mention names of kdians u’ve had lunch or dinner with,lol. He didn’t realise that was different cos those other ones were…er…slightly more innocent(presumably) situations. (But don’t stop dropping the names o,let us know dem one by one; u know say amebo na my work and I’m here for ALL the tea!)

    • Dennis Macaulay
      April 29, 06:09 Reply

      Aproko chestnut, you “do you” okwaya? #WankersAnonymous Jisie Ike!

      My dear its not only me ooo, plenty things are happening offline, KDians are hooking up big time and I am watching them with odu-anya, in due course I shall name names of KD-ians who visit one another and spend the weekend living in sin #YouKnowYourselves

      Erm about those photos, you know my email abi? #OutOfYourVoilitionOfcourse

      • trystham
        April 29, 06:29 Reply

        KDians are hooking up offline??? Pinky, what happened to this blog not being a hook up site? To think I have been playing by the rules on this KD. BAD PINKY!!! *here would be a nice place to put the angry face*

        • pinkpanthertb
          April 29, 06:57 Reply

          You just said it yourself, Trystham. ‘Hooking up offline’. Need I say more?

      • pinkpanthertb
        April 29, 06:49 Reply

        Hahahahahahahaa!!! Dennis, before you start dropping the names of sinners on KD, remember that I have your story right here… *slapping one palm on the other for emphasis*

        • pinkpanthertb
          April 29, 07:03 Reply

          😀 Just wanted to refresh where we stand with all this righteous robes we are considering wearing. @Dennis.

      • trystham
        April 29, 08:16 Reply

        Ehen nau! If this is a no-email, no phone number, no address zone, how the hell are ppl meeting??? Teach me!!!! I have a list of ppl I judt wanna catch a glimpse of on here b4 I die. Hian!!!

        Oh. Dennis has shared his email details before. Forget I said anything jare.

    • A-non
      April 29, 06:12 Reply

      I follow for the amebo committee o!

      Abeg confirm say my name still dey register and that my membership dues are up to date.

      Talking of amebo, where is enigmous??!!

  6. A-non
    April 29, 06:07 Reply

    Aha! The ‘rejections’ that came with being a student and a corper! Unfortunately, those experiences hasn’t changed my own attitude towards students and corpers either. Maybe it’s because of some of the stories I have heard or maybe it’s an unconscious attempt at revenge…I have never given it much thought till date.

    As for the nudes, I always ask the person if it’s a deal breaker and often times, they say it’s not and we continue the convo but eventually it does become a deal breaker because after a day or twos chat, they are back with same request and the delete button comes to the rescue.

    Nice piece Dennis as always and your posts always end up reiterating to me why I should put myself first as much as I possibly can.

    Great day!

    • Dennis Macaulay
      April 29, 06:10 Reply

      I can write a book about the rejections lol. Like you too my attitude did not change!

  7. trystham
    April 29, 06:23 Reply

    But Dennis, I AM disappointed., u do av a loud mouth. I’d av expected u to av kept ur ‘repentant’ friend’s issue away from ur other friends knowing what his fear was. Best u cud av done was call him up n teased HIM with the knowledge…n maybe gloat a bit. It was HIS struggle and frankly, he would av told u himself when he cannot keep up with his charade any longer. I hope u guys do feel happy with ur ‘I told u sos’. *rme

    I hate ppl asking for pics of any kind. The ONLY kinda pics I am inclined to.always sharing are the funny memes. The minute u start whining about the matter, I switch off and just hide u in one dusty crevice of my mind. I av recently started telling ppl, “do not ask for my pictures AT ALL.” b4 I add dem

    Barring the ‘supposed’ consequences of this online journal, I think you will survive.and manage to keep us entertained and educated at the same time. You are that resourceful.

    • Dennis Macaulay
      April 29, 06:30 Reply

      I no join for the “I told you so” na!

      Also he doesnt know we know, just that some people placed bets on the matter!

    • pinkpanthertb
      April 29, 06:55 Reply

      @Trystham, Do not ask for any pics at all?! What are you, Sia?

      • trystham
        April 29, 07:45 Reply

        Not that Pinky. Being literal minded, I prefer the image ur mind paints of u. You do know u can tell truly BEAUTIFUL ppl from their minds, and a great mind is NOT VAIN. Besides, if I were to judge ppl from their pictures, loads of ppl will never meet the standard of ‘drop dead gorgeous’ I have set for myself.

      • Max
        April 29, 07:50 Reply

        @Tryst, are you drop dead gorgeous?

      • trystham
        April 29, 08:07 Reply

        My dear, thats exactly my point o. If two ugly ppl meet and make babies,….*shudders* I’m looking out for the next generation o

  8. Ruby
    April 29, 06:26 Reply

    Another great entry by the most Eligible Bachelor on KD
    Bravo!!!!

      • pinkpanthertb
        April 29, 07:00 Reply

        LOL! Pitakwa Lord, own it abeg. Own your title. People Magazine will soon start calling to put you in their annual list of World’s Most Eligible Gay Bachelors. 😛

  9. trystham
    April 29, 06:35 Reply

    Wait wait!!! French toast nyash or French bread nyash? Biko nwam, those things are as strong as baseball bats and shaped like them too. Dennis, evidently u like twinks with an Akpan’s nyash

  10. REVEREND HOT
    April 29, 06:46 Reply

    ” He had doubled in size
    (tripled more like) and had squeezed himself into
    clothes he had when he was slim”

    Lol! Dennis!! That was funny in a very mean way…

  11. pinkpanthertb
    April 29, 06:52 Reply

    Hahahahahahahahahahahaaa!!! Max, you haf killed me. I thought the Lipstick Gang was still considering this advertisement. You just had to spring it up without warning.

  12. Masked Man
    April 29, 06:57 Reply

    Dennis, I read it all oh. So someone is chyking you from behind, and you didn’t tell me, so I can show the person who I am masked. Yet you come here and call me bae abi? We shall see oh.

  13. Chris
    April 29, 07:06 Reply

    Beautiful write up to kick start the day after the scripture( not forming sanctimonious) A persson can be celibate but i dont think a person can quit their sexuality unless he/she can prove that their sexuality is a choice.
    If an individual wants to send a nude of themselves( which i cant keep for long on my phone) they are welcome to do so but aint sending anything of such nature to anyone be it male or female. Caput.
    I trust the writer to apply discretion where his sexual liason or relationship matters are concern not to mention names without the permission of the other party/ies involved.
    I have personally never dated a person for what they are and would not appreciate anyone showing interest in me based on what i am.
    We in Nigeria, need to stop the idea of showing interest in somebody based on material effects, it is sad, no wonder the ritualists are having a field day. If we in 9jas are not asking that, the next fastest one would be ‘what role do you play’ am not an actor and if i was i certainly wont take a waka pass role.
    Once again, to DM, this write up is on point, , like the way you ‘gingerised’ this piece

    • Dennis Macaulay
      April 29, 08:28 Reply

      If we in 9jas are not asking that, the next fastest one would be ‘what role do you play’ am not an actor and if i was i certainly wont take a waka pass role.

      Lol you are so silly!

      I could write a book on roles and expectations

    • Peak
      April 29, 10:14 Reply

      Lol that waka pass line got me laughing real good

  14. Sinnex
    April 29, 07:07 Reply

    I can totally relate with everything.

    Some guys would just send you nude pictures, expecting you to reciprocate. When you don’t, they’d take offence. Some would send hairy ass pictures which immediately turns me off. The truth is that most guys don’t even send their own nudes, they send other guys nude. So, when I am willing to send a nude, I tell them to snap the room, the boxers they are putting on and the nude. That way, you can tell if the nude belongs to them.

    Now, to those who think they can turn off homosexuality, you people should not decieve yourself. Take it from someone who hasn’t had sex before. Homosexuality is beyond sex. You can resist it, but you can’t overcome it because it is part of you. Sometimes I am scared that if I don’t take care or have sex very soon, I would rape someone.

    Dennis, you are even lucky that you are now getting offers. What about me, who is presently working and have still not been able to get the person of my choice. One even told me to pay for air fare and hotel bills when he comes here, since I refused, he stopped chatting with me. I am seriously considering dating an older guy. The kind of guys I like always end up being ‘Warri’ kind.

    I am seriously going to give this organic stuff a trial.

    • Chris
      April 29, 07:38 Reply

      @Sinnex, older/mature dudes are the deal(not patronising oh), especially in the unfriendly
      same sex enviroment such as ours

  15. Khristopher B!
    April 29, 07:15 Reply

    It isn’t a crime to ask what a person does for a reason. I do it always, not to curve people but to be wary of a kito situation and maybe paranoia… Dennis Weldone on this entry. I was in Port Harcourt this past week for some job interview, need I say I was less than impressed with how untidy the city looked compared to Calabar. Although, I swear down there’s money $$$ in that place sha o!

    • Dennis Macaulay
      April 29, 07:39 Reply

      Consider a situation where someone asks me what I do for a living, and I reply that I work in healthcare, he then asks “as what”?

      This is someone I am just talking to on a hook up app! I might as well fax him my offer letter complete with KPIs and KRAs

      • trystham
        April 29, 08:09 Reply

        Looool @ KPIs and KRAs. He will prolly need references both official and sexual too Lmao

      • Absalom
        April 29, 08:33 Reply

        It’s socially inappropriate to want to know eeeeeeeevrything about a person within a few days/hours of meeting. If you tell me you “work in healthcare” I can hold on to that information for the next two weeks to one or two months – depending on how often we chat. As we continue to chat, information will drop both ways until we know as much as is okay about each other.

        A person who wants to have/exchange personal information quickly is likely someone who is careless about their own security, and you can’t trust them to be careful with yours. At least I don’t.

        If you want to know all about me in two days, wait till I write my autobiography.

      • Chris
        April 29, 08:37 Reply

        So some nincompoop would ask such “as what”?.
        I shake my head in disbelief. I woud’ve said as a
        domestic staff just to get rid of him fast.

  16. #TeamKizito
    April 29, 07:41 Reply

    And the ones that turn gay, bi-curious, yada. Tell ’em: once you go black, you never go back!

  17. pete
    April 29, 07:58 Reply

    so,nobody on KD sends nude again.

    • trystham
      April 29, 08:19 Reply

      Evidently NOT ANYMORE (Thank u Yul Edochie). Get that sarcastic tone out of ur voice bro. I smell good ones from miles away.

  18. Diablo
    April 29, 08:06 Reply

    ive passed the stage where I felt I could secure a man’s interest by sending him a pic of my bum ( thank goodness) and I hardly ever condone sexual conversations anymore. Its all abt growing up and realising there’s much more to u than a guys interest in your gleteus maximus. And redefining your self worth

    i enjoyed this.

      • Chris
        April 29, 08:42 Reply

        gluteus maximus….all this tongue twisting
        word for ass (ukwu) abi, okay 🙂

  19. Absalom
    April 29, 08:11 Reply

    Asking a person what they do is not materialistic. Not always. It helps contextualise the person you’re chatting with. It’s part of being security conscious.

    The world is a dangerous place; you don’t want to get mixed up with someone you’ll later regret. What if the guy you’re meeting is an armed robber and while you’re at his place the police raids? How are you going to convince the NIGERIAN police that you don’t know this guy from Adam? Hian. That is how people end up jailed without trial oh.

    Just because a person is unemployed or a student doesn’t mean they are up to no good. Judgements shouldn’t be made on people before we actually know them; but you have to be willing to be a little open to the person and demand same before meeting.

    *

    I like to share nudes when I’m in the mood, usually very late at night. The main thing I want to see, though, is the D, gauge the size. And one cockshot is enough. Depends on who I’m chatting with: if you’re naughty, I give you naughty; if you’re a gentleman, I can play the part too.

    *walks up to stage to receive my Oscar as Best Actor in a Grindr flick* Thank you, thank you, thank you everybadday… *tears in my eyes*

      • Max
        April 29, 08:51 Reply

        But they don’t turn you on, right? *drags you back to KD*

      • wondabuoy
        April 29, 10:38 Reply

        Mirage read my comment very well and see the formattings. I wasn’t in support of the “security conscious” movement.

    • wondabuoy
      April 29, 09:57 Reply

      “Asking a person what they do is not materialistic” … “It’s part of being security conscious”

      If asking someone “what do you do” is a “security conscious thing”, what is the guarantee that you are getting the RIGHT answer. So it’s definitely a materialist’s thing.

      The world is a dangerous place; you don’t want to get mixed up with someone you’ll later regret. What if the guy you’re meeting is an armed robber and while you’re at his place the police raids?

      Why would your meeting point with a stranger be iin YOUR place?

      **Yanks the oscar award from you and gives back to the …**

      • Mirage
        April 29, 10:08 Reply

        Oh please cut out the trying to say it’s being security conscious!some idiot added me on fb this morn and was all nice and polite,the thank you for accepting my request followed.He then added how is the word going? I replied,work? Am a student and he disappeared.To think he is even a lad!

      • Absalom
        April 29, 10:39 Reply

        Wondabuoy, the four sentences in the first paragraph of my comment are interconnected. Read/criticise them together.

        I also hope you cringed when you stated that everyone who asks what you do is after your money. Like, EVERYONE????? Including the sons of Senators and top govt officials? LOL, come on, be serious.

        Second, I never implied that anything in life is guaranteed, but let it not be said that you ran into trouble because you didn’t take any precautions at all.

        With the second part of your comment, you shot yourself in the foot when you said “stranger”. Basically, you agree that meeting a person you can’t quite place can be risky. Right?

        So wetin again come be the complaint?

      • wondabuoy
        April 29, 10:39 Reply

        Mirage read my comment very well and see the formattings. I wasn’t in support of the “security conscious” movement.

    • Chris
      April 29, 13:20 Reply

      If i am a conman and somene is now asking me ‘what do i do for living’.. mehn, the victim is
      so in for it ,and trust me , there are fantastic conmen in our country here that are better suited
      for work with CIA, MI5, KGB, FBI plus Scotland yard. Oh well, let just say in this our country , it is to
      better act like a dude and think like a CONMAN when meeting or linking some folks on dating sites.

  20. Colossus
    April 29, 10:00 Reply

    Hian! So nobody sends nudes again? Who come be the people Wey dey send the nudes? They are not on KD?

    I don’t think it is internalized homophobia for your friend to swear off men, he only reacted based on his bad experiences. When a woman swears off men, albeit temporarily, because she had a string of bad experiences, do we call that internalized heterophobia?

    Also, placing a bet on when he would get back in the ‘game’ was kinda insensitive of your friends.

    Oya had over to BBM and send pics of that your sexy ebube nwaigbo legs, nude of course, no socks business.

    • Teflondon
      April 29, 10:11 Reply

      Oh Colossus your Sacrasm and Derision Game strong. #Respect

      • pinkpanthertb
        April 29, 19:17 Reply

        Taking a shine to Colossus, are we now, Tef? Whatever happened to your adulation of Gad and how he completes you with his un-ass-kissing ways?

  21. Dennis Macaulay
    April 29, 12:06 Reply

    My god will judge you people calling my legs Ebube Nwagbo! All the girls in Nollywood y’all go and pick the ratchet one!

    Not fair

    • Colossus
      April 29, 12:33 Reply

      Adhere night be ratchet for face but those legs are to die for. Oya hanlele, I’m still waiting for those legs to get my blood pumping.

  22. Ace
    April 29, 12:17 Reply

    Lovely entry DM nwa. About your friend that wanted to stop fucking, I understand his plight. There was a semester when I was in school that my result wasn’t as good as my previous ones, I blamed my sexuality and my exploration of the gaybourhood. In fact, I though God was punishing me for being gay but one semester that I had the best result I ever had, I was always on the 2go gay lounge like no tomorrow. Then I realized it was just my effort towards school work that made the difference.

    I haven’t experienced the “do you have a job?” palaver but some guys go ahead to have monetary expectations from me like they would from someone with a job.
    About nudes, my phone is risky to store any explicit material. Even if you send me your nude, after looking at it for 5 seconds, I’ll just delete it. But if you ask me for a nude and I send it to you, please reciprocate and don’t tell me stories of how you don’t send nudes.

    And to those critiquing Dennis for including them in his stories. Just me, to those who don’t know you, you are just faceless. No need to be scared as long as Dennis does not reveal a reasonable level of your identity, no need to hate on him. I for one don’t know anyone on the blog except for my buddy handsomely inclined. Everyone else is just a silhouette.

  23. Peak
    April 29, 12:40 Reply

    I’m sorry but I ask and will continue to ask. It gives me an insight to who I’m chatting with. Expand our pool of topics to draw from in the course of our conversation and above all tells me if u can stand on ur feet. YES! I said it. Right here and right now I want a man. Not a boy, not a trustfund baby, a man. Its another thing to be on the job market. I was once conversing with a dude in my early stage, who brings up sex every chance he gets and wants me 2 be on the fone chatting with him, while I ve work piling up on my desk by the minute. It turns out he sells akube shoes in yaba. Doesn’t go to his shop all the time so he has more than enough time 2 chat. Even though I dragged it out 4 as long as I could all in the name of keeping an open mind, i just couldn’t see ahead after our meet cos we ve zero correlation. StUdents would ve class, assignments and stuff. A working man would ve…………well u can fill in the gap. My papa would always that there is always a certain sense of responsibility and growth a man gains when he starts sweating to get his own money. I ve this logic in my mind when ask. Does it make sense? To me yes

    About nudes. Well I ve sent some shirtless pic a couple of times. Anything below the belt? Mba 4 now.

    • Dennis Macaulay
      April 29, 13:25 Reply

      Peak it comes down to being a good person. I have seen very mature and well rounded students and I have seen “mature men” who are crappy individuals

    • Peak
      April 29, 14:42 Reply

      True! I recently became good friends with a student (of some sort), who has been bursting every myth or idea I ve about students and youngins. But you equally have to take into account of what does it for you. Students make me feel old among other this. My views might change as I get older but right now? Mba. If na P.hd. MBA, M.Sc and co student, I will do them sharperly. They are student too,No?**flashing my genius grin**

      • Chris
        April 29, 16:33 Reply

        @Peak if the post degree (MA, Msc, Mba) student is 20yrs old?
        #Askingforcuriousitysake

    • Peak
      April 29, 16:56 Reply

      Hahahaha @chris tbh I wouldn’t knock them off thanks to my myth buster. If you asked me like 2 months ago, the answer would be a No.if as today, I’d be like “we could be friends”. Yes I know my logic is flawed but I’m just being honest about the whole situation.

      • Chris
        April 29, 17:33 Reply

        @Peak , i should’ve asked you the same question 2 months ago then:)
        I appreciate your honesty and thanks for realising the loophole in
        your logic.

  24. Nuel
    April 29, 14:03 Reply

    DM, i begged you not to write abt it buh u still did. I was told u gonna write it, its just too bad.

    • Dennis Macaulay
      April 29, 16:15 Reply

      I am not quite sure who this is, but you are certainly not the person I referred to, this is not the moniker I was talking about.

      The person in question and I have laughed over this entry via email, so I dont know what you are doing.

      • Nuel
        April 29, 17:25 Reply

        Wot am doing its called ” you shouldn’t have written anytin abt it cos it private”. Ciao

        • pinkpanthertb
          April 29, 19:14 Reply

          Dennis said he has talked to the person involved, Nuel. Plus your pseudonym isn’t the one he was refering to. So quit the impersonation. Or you carry your grief to him to the place where you two first flirted with each other.

        • pinkpanthertb
          April 29, 19:15 Reply

          Whatever drama you are trying to kick up, I don’t want it here.

  25. GOld
    April 29, 15:04 Reply

    Nice write up DM.I always look forward to reading your posts.

    That said,I really don’t see anything wrong with asking and telling people what I do for a living. I ask what you do for a living,not because I wanna be a parasite but because I wanna be a friend and I believe being your friend means knowing things about you eg hobbies,what u do for a living, role,sexual orientation and I may even ask for ur favourite meal.For me I feel that’s what friendship is about.

  26. JustJames
    April 29, 16:31 Reply

    I’ll send nudes if I’m in a good mood but I’m usually not the first to ask. When I was a teenager and hookups were a scarce thing I didn’t mind nudes. I even thirsts after them. Now it’s just a “been there, done that” thing.

    Not all students are hungry and looking for money. I actually dread the “what do you do” question. Too many a time a hot piece of male specimen has ignored me once I said I’m a student.

    We young ones have suffered. The old ones don’t want us, our age mates don’t want us and the young ones will either be child abuse or looking for someone slightly older.

    • Chuck
      April 29, 18:26 Reply

      So students don’t want students? Well that’s up to students, no?

      In general if you’re gay, horny, and have something to lose, beware of anyone who doesn’t.

Leave a Reply