RANTINGS OF A RANDOM (Gay) NIGERIAN (Entry 45)

RANTINGS OF A RANDOM (Gay) NIGERIAN (Entry 45)

I easily tire of our community here on Kito Diaries whenever the issue of religion comes up. I tire of how unrelenting we are in our standpoints whenever we are discussing religion and its relationship with homosexuality, with accusations of idiocy for taking your faith seriously and counter-accusations of godlessness flying back and forth. There is almost never a middle ground, and it is wearying.

Last week, I went to church. After the service, I ran into an old friend who insisted that we take selfies. I wasn’t particularly keen on the pictures so I did not bother asking him for copies. I just went straight home afterwards. He later posted the pictures on Instagram and rightfully indicated that the location was a church.

And I was jejely lying down when my friend pinged me with the message: So you have joined the religitard Jesus boys? Tsk, tsk.

You know sometimes, a message can be too stupid to even warrant a response. I read it and neither replied nor acknowledged response.

I think it’s funny what a lot of godless gay men say about religion. For the most part though, I do not blame them, because a lot of evil has been perpetuated in this world in the name of religion. A lot of persecution on the LGBT has been carried out with religion as an excuse. So I kind of get where these LGBT individuals are coming from.

For me however, I see religion differently. The world is a very tough place to live in, especially when you live in a third world country like Nigeria, where our leaders think with the left lobes of their asses. Getting through each day is very difficult, with life constantly throwing curve balls at you. People therefore want something that keeps them centered and stops them from going crazy. For some people, it’s drugs. For some others, it’s alcohol. And for very many people, it is religion which helps them keep their sanity and function in this crazy world. Sometimes you go to church and the choir breaks out into this rendition that you so love and you lose yourself in the song and feel your worries melt away.

I remember when my cousin asked me if I was an atheist because of the things he had seen on my Facebook timeline and all, and I laughed. Like Absalom says, I am much too lazy to be an atheist, because quite a lot of reading and research is involved in it. The truth is: personally I don’t doubt the existed of God. There is a Supreme Being Who is a creative force behind the universe. It’s something I cannot rationalize to a lot of you, and clearly not something built on logic. It is simply something I feel. And there are times this Supreme Being has come through for me on specific issues that I reached out for help with.

To me religion is not the problem. The problem lies in its application. Guns don’t kill, right? It’s humans who kill with guns? The people who practice religion are the problem. The practice of religion should be about this: Do not assume your religion is more superior to another person’s, and when you go about the application of your religion, do not be an asshole.

It’s as simple as that.

*

Last week, I talked about being the best at what you do and deciding to be so successful, the homophobic society would have to respect you. Well, I was watching one of the old Anaconda movies, and while beleaguered targets of the predatory reptile were trying to figure out how to kill it, someone among them remarked that the way to kill it was from the inside. Essentially someone had to volunteer to be swallowed by the snake so that the said person could eliminate it from within.

While I was sitting there watching the movie, I had an epiphany, a realization that I have always known anyway: to change things, we have to get into the system and become a part of it, so that we can cause change to happen from the inside. Take for instance, if someone like me was sitting in the senate chamber the day that draconian bill was passed, would I have kept quiet? No! Would the bill have passed? Probably. But it will register that I did not consent to it, and from there, a conversation will start about why I did not agree to the bill.

Another instance is what TIERs is doing on giving seed capital to gay people to start businesses. Imagine if every year, we empowered 50 serious-minded, driven gay people to create profitable startups. In 20 years, we would have an army of very successful gay people with a few millions to spend and most importantly a voice to cause change. Imagine if you were a Head of Department with a predilection for speaking out, would you allow homophobia to thrive in your department? Imagine if you were a judge or at least a magistrate, and a kito case appears in your court… Imagine if you were a senior military officer, one who could oversee the birth of a discrete Pink force, which would surreptitiously take out the menace of kito (okay that’s my overactive imagination going on again, lol). But I hope you guys follow my argument?

Are you seeing what we can do if we decide to be great and do great things?

If you are one of those gay men who believe all this is a “game”, that we should do our “stuffs” (who speaks that kind of English anyway?) in secret, please this exhortation is not for you. Kindly pass. I am speaking to people who recognize that there is a problem here and we must at least attempt to lay a foundation before we hand the baton to the LGBT generations coming after us. Imagine Dr. Francis or Simba heading NACA? Do you know what that would do for gay men who are HIV positive?

We have to change strategy if we are going to make any progress. Imagine if we as a community had the kind of influence to push gay men and women secure in their sexualities into elective positions, this would lead to the steady scratching out of the system until it is made to reform to our ideals. Think on these things, my dear brothers and sisters. These are aspirations worth endeavoring for.

XOXO

DM

Previous Straight Guys Talk About Getting Hit on By Men In The Locker Room
Next A STATE OF OUR UNION (Part 2)

About author

You might also like

Series (Non-Fiction) 14 Comments

DON’T CALL ME BIGGIE

After reading Dubem’s BIG AND BEAUTIFUL?, I felt inspired to tell the stories on my personal experiences as a plus-sized man in our community.   Man: Dayo (not real name)

Series (Non-Fiction) 49 Comments

BEFORE I DIE: 3 (Lean On Me)

I am walking through the corridor and I notice something. Everyone is staring at me, and laughing. I keep my head down and walk on straight. I don’t want to

Series (Non-Fiction) 18 Comments

THE HOOK-UP STORY VIII

I recently had a short fling, like two days short, with a guy named Felix. We connected on Facebook and were soon chatting and getting acquainted. He looked very familiar,

75 Comments

  1. Too clean
    March 23, 07:16 Reply

    Good one DM…

    I align myself to everything you wrote here..it did it for me.

    I have been trying to reach out to people who are in places where they can help affect the lives of gay men all over but like you rightly put it,a lot of us see it as a game..

    I work in ugwu Hausa though my family house is in Lagos….right here,there have been series of litigations going on with some gay guys and almost no lawyer has agreed to take up briefs for them to represent them in court and its that bad.

    I think I am the only lawyer who is so bold to defend them.I must say this,it has not been very easy..if not that they feel I am doing what my profession demands,I would have been tagged a * gay right activist**(that’s if they don’t say it anyway)..

    There was a case like that in the Federal high court,these two guys were arraigned…there was no representation for them and the prosecuting counsel was prosecuting on behalf of the Attorney general of the federation….i was in the court for my own case,..i did mine because I am senior(I announced my case first) the rule is that you can’t leave the court empty..so I had to wait..

    That was how this my colleague will ask the judge to enter judgment for the accused once they take their plea of being guilty and you will be see sentence slamming of 10-15 years on them (for a different offense)

    I asked a lay man that what was the two guys offense because they looked matured and clean,he said they were caught fucking in an uncompleted building in the afternoon…and he is the relation to one of them but no lawyer to defend them as most lawyers they meet refused to take it up..
    As their matter was called up,after announcing her appearance,I stood up to announce my appearance for the defendants,everyone was surprised as no one has come on their behalf before….

    The long story short is that instead of slamming 14 years on them,I prayed that they were first time offenders and the judge was impressed on my submission and granted them two weeks jail term…they are happy and very thankful with some caution of course.,

    Since then,my number has been distributed to all the guys there that anytime they have cases like that,I will be getting calls…I am happy at what I am doing but some of can be stupid oo

    There was a time I was going to work,I saw two guys kneeling down on the road under the hot sun with soldiers flogging them..from the car,I took pictures with my phone,then got down to meet them..
    What was their crime?

    They are two guys who are handsome living together,they don’t talk to girls in their neighborhood and they are suspecting them to be gay,they planned and badge into their room saw them on boxers and concluded that they just finished having sex,..i was mad eh..i introduced myself to the soldiers.,.i told them if they don’t stop beating them,I have pictures already..After all,they were released,apologized to in front of everyone standing by…i asked if I should take it up in a legal way,they said No..but I uploaded the pictures on my Facebook without the faces of the guys showing just to pass a message across
    .
    Lets work together.One person can’t do it alone..
    If you follow me on Facebook,I am very vocal about these issues. E no concern me if you think I am gay o,the last time I checked,I took an oath to render my services to all…

    • ambivalentone
      March 23, 08:19 Reply

      IN YOUR OWN FUCKING HOUSE??? What are u supposed to wear? Agbada on a suit??? God, please save this country from idiots in high and low places

    • Delle
      March 23, 13:33 Reply

      I’m speechless Too Clean. Good work you’re doing! XO

    • doe eyed monster
      March 24, 07:51 Reply

      Too Clean….God bless you.. May your prints never be erased.
      @DM boo hates that I like you so much… You just say everything on my mind.

    • DI-NAVY
      March 24, 09:59 Reply

      LORD!!!!!!!!WTF!!!!!!!In your own house which you paid the rent??????????? what the freaking fvck!!!!!!!!!! This is outright stupidity. kai

    • Jaden
      March 24, 10:43 Reply

      First, I want to thank you @Too Clean for your passionate commitment to this thriving community in Nigeria. May God bless you and keep us all in blessings, Amen.

      Secondly, For the gay guys in the north that might need immediate assistance with their legal issues, please call us @Tiers on our toll free line for immediate action and assistance free of charge. the call line is 0800 2255 84377 and it is free to call, like you don’t spend your credit calling us. Please call and share your issues with us and to make enquiries. Monday- Friday 9am – 5pm.
      We are here to serve you and help you. please call and report your issues, both health and legal, and it is highly confidential. Thank you.

      • Francis
        March 24, 11:11 Reply

        Thanks a lot. Info like this should be placed in a prominent place on the site for easy access to any visitor. Like say in between the main article and comment section.

      • Pink Panther
        March 24, 11:50 Reply

        Jaden, does this number and service only apply for those in the North?

  2. bruno
    March 23, 07:28 Reply

    “religitard” is an offensive word that only serves to kill a potentially meaningful conversation about religion and homosexuality before it even starts.

    that said, homosexuality and christianity/islam are like water and oil. they don’t mix. i understand that religion is a crutch for weaker minds but you can surely do better than getting your psychological support from a book that clearly states that you should be killed. that sort of dependency sounds a lot like stockholm syndrome to me.

    i agree that we need to be a part of the system to change it but we know homosexuals are already a part of most systems and currently they are doing zilch to change that system.

    also not everyone is going to be a successful influential leader and those that will won’t get there overnight. what everyone does have is a sphere of influence where they can act right now. dr francis doesn’t have to wait to head naca before making an impact on hiv prevention. each one of us is already an influencer in his own space and if we aren’t using the little power we have now, we won’t use the big one when it comes.

    • Mandy
      March 23, 07:48 Reply

      ‘i understand that religion is a crutch for weaker minds…’
      What was it you were saying about the use of religitard and how it ruins conversations?
      Religious people are not all of weak minds.

      • Max 2.1
        March 23, 09:28 Reply

        @Mandy, they really are weak minded. Having a weak mind is what’ll make someone believe some myth they’ve never seen over a clear evidence that people are born gay.

        • Somebody
          March 23, 14:59 Reply

          What of those that believe the “myth” and still believe that some people are born gay?

    • Dennis Macaulay
      March 23, 08:54 Reply

      Bruno I just gave an example, I wasn’t giving a template besides success is very relative anyway and not all super heroes wear uniforms.

      Everybody can do something, no matter how small

  3. drizzle
    March 23, 07:44 Reply

    Sigh!!
    Just when I was enjoying DM’s write up,i scrolled down to the comment, i should have stopped up there.

    DM I concur.

  4. Mandy
    March 23, 07:46 Reply

    There’s a certain utopian feel to this clarion call, DM. I’m not deriding it o. In fact, I also wish for a Nigerian LGBT community with this strength and zeal to make this country good for us. But we’re a cowardly nation, as a people, and those of us in LGBT, are even cowardlier and have used too many rationalizations to justify our cowardliness. Case in point: the Rays and KingBeys of our community from that post on Saturday.

    • Mitch
      March 23, 08:26 Reply

      You know you’re a bitch, right?

    • Dennis Macaulay
      March 23, 08:58 Reply

      Well Mandy I see your point but let this fear rather than hold us back propel us to act. The fact that a man was dragged out of his apartment in this country and murdered? And the killers went to brag about it on Facebook is something that terrifies me and reminds me that we are not safe.

      Even the one that says its a game, we should do “stuffs” on the DL, you will not be safe if you are outed and the mob comes for you.

      Let this fear propel some bravery no matter how little rather than cowardice, because eh anybody can be fucked up anytime and that is something that keeps me awake at night!

      If I die let it be from something I couldn’t control like sharks or a plane crash, not that my own country men pulled me out to murder me because I love a man!

  5. prince
    March 23, 07:53 Reply

    Inspiring in all ways.Let us all go for success.

  6. Dickson Clement
    March 23, 08:18 Reply

    I believe in the existence of God. I equally know the bible was written by men and inspired by God! I was telling someone, the bible needed to be updated. They should seek new inspiration from God. There were days when Christians refused blood transfusion, today different cutting edge, highly redefined scientific breakthroughs abound! If I have sex in Mars, have I sinned? Afterall most rules in the bible is for people on earth. I think the change we seek should reflect here! Let’s spend more time writing informative, challenging, articles. I enjoy the sex and lifestyle articles but let it not be all there is to it. Gay men are the most successful people on earth! I know some of us would have heard this assertion? Let us internalize it, breath it, forge ahead with it. If u have some friends and all they bring to the table is man-talk, it’s not a healthy friendship!!!

  7. Too clean
    March 23, 09:12 Reply

    @Ambivalence,I don’t know if they were fucking..

    Infact they said they were not even fucking sef. They just laid on their beds talking before their door became open..

    Dm,honestly,I don’t know how to do emails stuff hence my not always sending in stories here,I don’t think I can be able to maintain an emai for a week

    But I think I follow you on instagram not sure though o

    • Dennis Macaulay
      March 23, 09:57 Reply

      Instagram? Obara Jesus Kraist! My nyash don open finish. How is it that you don’t use email in this year of our lord 2016?

      Anyway DM the person you follow on IG, if its me I’d respond or just Find me on twitter

  8. Mitch
    March 23, 09:30 Reply

    Very well said, DM. However, will the Nigerian LGBT community agree to come out of their fear induced hazes and not only work but fight for what they believe in? We have got far too many cowards among us who would gladly sit with the homophobes and stone us while we march than march with us. Until we choose to define ourselves by our standards and live to be true to ourselves, our battle will not end.

    • Dennis Macaulay
      March 23, 09:56 Reply

      Mitch dear what is your point exactly?

      There are those who don’t want to lift a finger to do anything, therefore those who want to try should not bother themselves.

      Is this what you are saying?

      • Mitch
        March 23, 10:24 Reply

        I’m saying how many of us are willing to stand up and fight? It’s just a negligible few out of the several thousand or even million of us that are willing and ready to do whatever it takes. The others would either stay away or join in the battle against us, afterall, “it’s all a game”.

          • Mitch
            March 23, 10:55 Reply

            Yeah, it is. It may be fought with words, propaganda and ideologies rather than arms but it remains a battle nonetheless.

            • Dennis Macaulay
              March 23, 12:12 Reply

              Again I ask Mitch, so because we are few we should not bother?

              I am trying to understand your comment

              • Mitch
                March 23, 12:37 Reply

                I’m not saying we shouldn’t bother. What I said, I said for those who don’t want to do anything about our situation, those who rest on their haunches because they have been conditioned to see who they are as innately wrong. This is one battle where strength in numbers matters immensely. So basically, what I’m saying is our purpose will be defeated if we are not of one mind on this. Reorientation: that should be our first course of action. Reorient the minds of LGBT individuals to understand their rights and they would stop begging for crumbs.

                • Dennis Macaulay
                  March 23, 14:34 Reply

                  You see I would disagree with you; humans are complete entities and when they are adults they often make their own decisions. Re-orient all you want, at the end of the day it’s up to the person to decide what they want to do. You cannot force anybody to change their minds or become sympathetic to your cause. In my experience for instance when I talk about gender inequality more women than men tell me to shut up and accept the status quo as their precious culture prescribes.

                  So I disagree with you that we have to wait until harry potter gives us a magic wand to change the mindsets of people. At the end of the day not everybody wants to make the world a better place, most people are fine as long as they can meet their needs.

                  Those that can should, no matter how little and those who won’t? Well they should still siddon dey look. Its that simple, but to say that those who will should wait until they change the minds of others does not sit well with me.

  9. McDuke
    March 23, 09:37 Reply

    Nice write up…totally agree with everything you wrote esp your sentiments on religion just that I’m stunned that’s coming from you considering your “previous” stance on religion and going to church. I’m happy you’re finally seeing it both ways.

    “Too clean” I’m mortified by your narrative. It goes to show none if us is safe in this country as long as sth ain’t done about this anti gay law. No wonder my neighbour once asked me if I’m normal bcos I stay alone and he has never seen a girl sleep over at my place…I knew where he was heading to so I totally ignored him.

    I must commend your courage and passion for the community. Pls keep on with the good work. I’m encouraged by your activism…It’s inspiring.

  10. Max 2.1
    March 23, 09:56 Reply

    This seems a bit too white washed for me. Most gay people have already spent two-thirds of their life being oppressed, so not many would speak up when the need arises. There’s a term for it, it’s called “fear conditioning” where the mind associates certain events/stimuli with negative emotions, stress and discomfort.

    I’ve said it before that religion isn’t entirely bad, its what keeps most people from unleashing the demon within and also something that serves as some sort of therapy in a topsy turvy world like ours. However it’s also the very thing that most people I’ve come across have used to speak against homosexuality.

    To be honest, it’s hard to believe in god when all I have is a 2000yr old book telling me I’m an abomination and should be stoned to death, it’s hard to believe that they got their inspiration from a god who allegedly created humans who he loves. Its also hard to believe there’s a supreme being, makes you Wonder where “it” came from. Throughout human history, mankind have been trying to destroy each other over and over again, so much chaos and injustice still thrives in the world today with all our technological advancement.

    If you’re gay and still call yourself a christian, you’re probably deluded. While straight people can purchase the freedom to have sex when they get married, what choice do you have as a gay christian? The kind of sex you have will never be approved of by your religion, neither are you ever going to marry the person you want to, you’ll forever be condemned by the very thing you hold most dear and there’s no way out. No amount of atonement, no wedding of yours would be recognized by it. Any gay person who calls himself christian is just delaying pain, the pain that comes with rejection by the very thing they love.

    Its hard to believe that god exists, in a place where people give birth and throw away their offspring, where people make nuclear bombs to threaten and kill each other, where people born differently are lynched on a daily basis without any consequences on the lynchers. I do not want to worship such a god, a god that sits by while people he created perish, a god who sits by and does nothing while tornado wipes out families, a god who allows tsunami and earthquakes rock the very thing he created.

    MBA, I’m sick of it.

    • Dennis Macaulay
      March 23, 10:01 Reply

      1. I have not asked anybody to take up religious affiliations, I merely stated where I stand on the issue, everybody is free to write their own scripts.

      2. As per the first part of your comment, so because of this negative conditioning we should not try to do anything? We should fold our hands and watch? And maybe one day get dragged out and killed too?

      • Max 2.1
        March 23, 10:50 Reply

        I never said we shouldn’t do anything. You of all people should know I’m all about activism. I’m just stating the reason that most people would probably never do it.

  11. Too clean
    March 23, 10:10 Reply

    Please it’s not a crime in Nigeria to be gay..kindly quote me anywhere.

    I have made this submission in several courts and none has objected to it.

    Following the anti gay law,its only when you do PDA,coming out that you want to get married publicly and you are caught in the act bla bla

    • Absalom
      March 23, 10:55 Reply

      I’m not a lawyer, but…

      Is it possible to criminalize the expression of an identity without having criminalized the identity itself?

      Can singing be criminalized without implicating singers or people who have a talent for singing?

      The law not only criminalizes same-sex PDA, it even bans LGBT people from congregating or forming organisations that cater to our needs. So how exactly can a person be gay in this country without any of these things? By being celibate and avoiding each other? The criminalized actions do not perform themselves; PEOPLE who are LGBT do them.

      Plus, considering that the law feeds off a potent homophobic culture, if people suspect a person is gay they may want to monitor the person or even set them up to find out the truth. Essentially helping the police to catch a thief.

      While your argument works in court (and buys us time) – I’d use it myself – I think that in the grand scheme of things, the gay identity is criminalized in Nigeria.

      • Too clean
        March 23, 15:13 Reply

        Well,I wouldn’t know about suspicion in general but I speak as a lawyer.
        Mere suspicion is not enough in a court of law..
        You have to prove it beyond reasonable doubt…
        It’s a crime against the state..and the court is not too quick to enter judgment without exploring all avenues.
        .I have,by God’s mercies been able to discharge some guys whose cases where beyond repairs…

        If they monitor you and do anything that is against the law to achieve that,and you meet a good and intelligent lawyer who knows how to look for loopholes in cases,the matter will turn against them

        There was one in Kano,they gave the police the information about a guy…The police who was supposed to carry out the search with a warrant didn’t do so,it was the neighbors who badge into the room and saw them fucking…as in hot fucking….

        The guys felt that the world has come to an end for them,I told them not to worry…

        Subsequently,I raised the issue of breaking and entering,invasion of privacy against the neighbors..
        .i came with that submission because if they had not broken in,they would not have known..

        I asked the judge politely that even if he sleeps with a married woman in his bedroom and someone badges in what would he call that…his hands were tied.

        He struck out the case and I prayed the court to make those neighbors go in for malicious prosecution and it was granted
        …They spent 6 months each and they paid 300,000 for compensation to the guys…

        See,it just that people think the courts can’t help a gay,its not true oo..

        One lawyer can’t do it alone oooi

        We can both do it but we should be careful..
        if you have such case,biko,cry for help there are lawyers who are sympathetic to this cause who may not be gay..m

        Some lawyers are approaching the supreme court to challenge that law,my humble self is among too

        I am not saying I am the best,just that I have never lost any case concerning any gay no matter how bad the situation is..Its not bragging but its God’s grace because after my call,I begged God to bring to me any Gay case if I will not use my last breathe to see to its conclusion.

        With all these,who will say HE doesn’t answer prayers..Who will say?

        • Francis
          March 23, 15:22 Reply

          *eyes wide open and jaw still on the ground*

          Are you really pulling all these stunts in Naija and none of these judges have shut you down? I’m kind of having a hard time believing that they (the judges) are all leaving their prejudice aside to handle these cases in the right way.

          Kudos by the way ??

          • Too clean
            March 23, 15:41 Reply

            Lol just know the law and its rudiments,and off you go..

            Its not about emotions (though it comes to play when you are before a female judge and its a rape case,then you are finished)

            Just be good at technicalities.Be bold.Be confident even if you are wrong,you will see what it would do for you..

            Though it depends on the individual…some might not get away with it..but I have made up my mind no matter what,I will do it

        • Pink Panther
          March 23, 15:57 Reply

          Oh my God! With folks like this, I get renewed hope for this country. Too Clean, you are simply just a warrior.

        • Dimkpa
          March 23, 17:40 Reply

          I am truly impressed by youreturn efforts to help brothers in need. You are a true hero. More power to you…

    • A-non
      March 23, 11:14 Reply

      That is if the person doesn’t get killed before being able to prove that their being gay is not the crime but the other things you highlighted.

      • ambivalentone
        March 23, 17:58 Reply

        I swear, my brother. Person for don die b4 case reach court

        That said, shouldn’t there be situations where the defendant gets to speak for himself besides pleading ‘not guilty’? Especially where no lawyers want to take up d case?

  12. You-Know-Who
    March 23, 10:41 Reply

    I wonder were you all get the energy to type long messages and comments. i commend you guys! esp Max. My word.. You get time.

    Probably DM’s best rant ever? You spoke my mind with all you said. Being a LGBT Voltron is all fun and cute.. but tbh its really not my thing. Not all of us are well equipped for such ” Bravery “

  13. Me myself
    March 23, 10:51 Reply

    I read the article and it was a call to do what we can (grand gestures, small-small, covertly, whatever) to influence the rights of LGBT people in Nigeria(Nice one Mr. DM, I totally doff my hat to you)then comments below is filled with how cowardly the Nigerian LGBT are and that they can’t speak out and bla bla bla…….. We already know SOME Nigerians are afraid to do anything but the article is not to remind us of our fear, its to motivate us to do something, so i mean no disrespect when i say this; Mandy, Mitch and Max please SHUT THE F*CK UP. Do not distract us from the message of this fine wine this morning. @tooclean, well done brother man, thats the spirit we need.

      • Me myself
        March 23, 11:13 Reply

        Truly n truly, not even the smallest iota.

    • Max 2.1
      March 23, 11:48 Reply

      “No offense”, but go Fuck! Yourself!.

      ?

    • Mitch
      March 23, 12:00 Reply

      Reminding you of your fear is to make you get your cowardly ass up and stand for yourself. But sorry, I forgot dimwits still existed. My bad…..

      • Dennis Macaulay
        March 23, 12:21 Reply

        Mitch to be honest you lost me too at some point, you did not finish what I see now that you wanted to say. You kept reiterating how people are cowardly and afraid and all without saying anything about actually standing up for yourself!

        This is what He tried to point out in very colorful language as is typical with KD-ians ?

        I wish we can disagree without insulting or denigrating each other!

  14. chuck
    March 23, 11:58 Reply

    Here we go again. You’re making a false equivalence between a position backed by logic, history and anthropology on one hand, and the illogical religion that yiu compare to drugs, alcohol and coping mechanisms on the other hand.

    A belief in God is a red flag, just like believing that women are submissive to men – it shows that you don’t make rational decisions.

    On a final note, guns kill people. How many people have been killed this year in countries where gun ownership is regulated? Please don’t repeat shallow conservative talking points here.

    • Somebody
      March 23, 15:05 Reply

      So if a person believes in God it means he can’t make rational decisions?? Where do you people get your facts from biko?

      • chuck
        March 23, 18:43 Reply

        The belief in a supreme being is not backed by any evidence or logical argumentation. QED, the person doesn’t decide beliefs based on rationality.

        • Somebody
          March 23, 19:20 Reply

          That’s a big fallacy. Just because there isn’t any “logical” evidence about the existence of God doesn’t make it false. It’s also very fallacious to generalize and conclude that everyone that believes in a “supreme being” doesn’t make rational decisions. For someone who criticizes people for not making rational decision your points are pretty irrational.

          • chuck
            March 23, 19:41 Reply

            It’s not fallacious. If you’re here saying you know there is a God even when you can’t provide evidence, that means you don’t expect evidence to play a part in what you consider fact/ reality.

            As I said in my comment, it’s a red flag – it shows a pattern of refusing the logical decision. So you believe those people are rational even when they have a public, irrational belief?

  15. Cho
    March 23, 12:40 Reply

    DM, I actually will like to meet you someday…you are quite an interesting character and we are age mates. We’re old! Lol!
    Being gay and xtian, maybe you should listen to Andrew Wommack. ..you can search on YouTube. He was not condescending or obnoxious like most others but he spoke well.
    To the lawyer, I salute your courage in a country like this. I feel Nigeria should have been silent on homosexuality bcos it has contributed to homophobia. I also feel that countries like the United States etc have kinda shoved it down people’s throat. Live and let’s live for heaven sake! I would personally not be bothered by anyone’s sexuality at work or anywhere and wouldn’t like to see people being punished for what they practise in their homes. This world sha. Y’all just ask God to keep his grace flowing

    • Pink Panther
      March 23, 12:49 Reply

      ‘I feel Nigeria should have been silent on homosexuality bcos it has contributed to homophobia. I also feel that countries like the United States etc have kinda shoved it down people’s throat.’
      Somehow you admire DM’s standpoint and preach something he doesn’t believe in in the same breath. lol.
      Okay.

  16. Cho
    March 23, 13:10 Reply

    Bros, abeg don’t add sand to my garrI. I actually meant the Senate not Nigeria. Before the bill was passed no one really could be bothered but now there’s heightened awareness and increased homophobia. Besides I can have differing opinion no? I still think the guy is interesting.

  17. Delle
    March 23, 13:44 Reply

    Well, well, well, the solution is here finally. The Gay Bible. It’s come to my notice that a guy called Robert Whitehead has just come up with a Gay bible to urge many gay people who have conflicted feelings towards religion. That said, how many would want to own one and put these arguments and sentimental premises to rest once and for all?

    The other day, a guy sent me a message on facebook and was appreciating me for being vocal on the LGBT issues on a group on facebook. Is that enough? Maybe not…but I’m glad to at least be recognised for doing a little. That’s all that is required of us. And that aspect of trying to be someone respectable, I couldn’t agree more.
    Inspiring.

  18. michael
    March 23, 14:28 Reply

    Me I intend being the governor of my state in the near futire and wipe out all form of jungle justice. And I will make laws that will make it impossible for any dumb ass homophone to lay a hand on any person for being gay.

  19. Francis
    March 23, 14:56 Reply

    And that’s how people will be praying ogbonge prayers on ya behalf even if you can’t be bothered with things like politics. ???

    D.M, thanks for another excellent piece. I can just imagine gay folks running the major businesses in Nigeria and being the best bosses. That kain thing dey help change pipul mind-set.

    Every little bit helps and I do understand those that say they don’t have the strength for even the tiniest activism. Those of us that haff the strength will continue until you are strong enough to join in ?? #KumbayaMode. ??

  20. sensei
    March 23, 16:30 Reply

    Nice piece, DM. And kudos to our heroic lawyer. Una well done.

  21. Khaleesi
    March 23, 16:44 Reply

    This is a really great piece DM, i personally dislike religion a lot, its full of contradictions and breeds and insane amount of Hypocrisy and stupidity + as you pointed out, a lot of evil has over the centuries been done in the name of religion, but then a lot of good also continues to be done in the name of religion. My policy these days is to each his own – if religion makes you happy and helps you get through life easier, by all means please indulge just dont judge or condemn. Everyone is entitled to his beliefs or lack of beliefs! I shall sha be pointing out the inconsistencies and hypocrisy whenever i see them!
    I stand firmly behind your point that we have to begin seriously to strive for Excellence wherever we find ourselves. A lot of gays in these parts are content with furtively screwing around until its time to go back to the ‘straight path’ they just dont see the bigger picture! But wherever you are, you can start from within your small circle. I personally do not tolerate homophobic comments from anyone around me! If you’re homophobic around me, i point out your stupidity without necessarily outing myself. Its easily doable, you simply have to be smart & logical about it …

  22. Marc Francis of Chelsea
    March 23, 18:26 Reply

    Loved this piece.

    For me, I don’t believe in Christianity, I believe in God. Christianity has taught me the way to get to God through prayer, but everything has been mumbled my men.

    It’s like gay people are Cinderella and our father (God) is away so our evil stepmothers (religious bigots) have done everything in their power to make us feel like our Father would never love or accept us.

    @TooClean you sound like a wonderful person. I hope I’m as brave as you one day to take on gay cases head on.

    • Tiercel de Claron
      March 23, 19:58 Reply

      Shouldn’t that read Churchianity or you just don’t know what Christianity mean?

  23. Dimkpa
    March 23, 21:51 Reply

    I don’t like the term religitards or whatever else people of faith may be called because it is a way of doing unto others what I wouldn’t want done to me. I don’t have a problem with anyone that goes to church

    However, as far as religion goes, I am done. There’s a saying “the good will do the best they can and the bad will do the worst they can but if you want good people to do bad things, use religion”. I paraphrase a bit but the truth of this is glaring not least of all as regards homosexuality. It was used to justify racism and slavery. It is used by the suicide bombers and jihadists to justify the wanton killing of innocent people. In America now the ‘religious freedom’ bill is being used as an excuse to discriminate against gay people. A lot of the problems we have as gay men would disappear if there was no organised religion.

    Therefore I have decided I won’t be part of it. It places premium on believing a doctrine on bad evidence. I once read a wise saying in a book ‘if you understand why you don’t believe in other people’s religion then you’ll understand why I don’t believe in yours’
    I still hold that for any doctrine that purports to be the manual for life, the evidence so far from the articles of faith is tenuous and hardly above board like would reasonably be expected. Most people hold beliefs they do just by accident of birth, how they come to be convinced theirs is the one through religion is beyond me.

    Besides what is all the striving for? To make heaven where there shall be no sex for eternity? Abeg tell me something else. We need to emancipate ourselves from this mental slavery; the need to be watched by a Supreme being who is particularly interested in what we do in the bedroom; and the absurd idea that of the 7 billion people in the world, God would change the course of events to suit just one individual because he prayed.

  24. simba
    March 24, 07:34 Reply

    Nice write up…. let all help each other…personally,my tailor down to my housekeeper are all community members, it’s called empowerment as far as they know their jobs and don’t short change me lol…. Hahhahahahahah @ me or Francis heading NACA….

Leave a Reply