THE NEW NORMAL (Rebrand in Progress)

Buzzzzzzz…..buzzzz….click-clack… Stuck again!

I tried to stifle a giggle as the barber wrestled his clipper from the jaws of my hair. This was the third time in the last five minutes.

“Ma, your hair… it’s quite tough,” he complained.

At that point, I burst out laughing. Of course I knew it is tough. The bent comb on my dresser at home could attest to that. My hair had been growing really well (about 3 inches now) after chemo and I was happy and all. But after so many years on locs, combing natural hair had become incredibly frustrating for me. Plus, the hair itself would not cooperate. I was reminded again one of the reasons I decided to go on locs for the last ten years before cancer.

The barber went at it again, and I guess the fourth time’s a charm because he finally cut it to a manageable length before starting to shape it.

I was at the barbershop on October 16 to get a whole new cooperate persona to present to clients. The thing is that, in the previous two weeks, I had been feeling overwhelmed with all the studying and classes I needed to take. It just seemed like there wasn’t enough hours in the day to get all I needed to do, done. So I went back to the drawing board and took a long, hard look at my plans again as outlined HERE.

Around the same time, I randomly came across a video on YouTube about Ikigai, the Japanese concept of “A Reason for Being” and having a purpose in life. Ikigai dictates that when your passion, mission, profession and vocation align, you will feel at peace and your life will feel more worthwhile. To explain further, if what you love and what you are good at falls in line with something the world needs and you can be paid to do it, then you have found Ikigai.

I slept on it. It took me a week to figure it out, but I finally got clarity. I concluded on Brand Design & Strategy.

I cut down on manga-writing, but I kept the Japanese lessons going. I also decided to stop Google Analytics for now and I made a pivot on Web Development to just focus on Web Design and Graphic Design, as they relate to branding. I still had a lot work to do with regards measuring up for these roles, but at least it was less chaotic and overwhelming, and it seemed to have more of a precise focus or end goal.

Next was to draw out a plan to achieve it all and find clients that would pull me out of poverty, easy-peasy. I would be leveraging social media and content marketing a lot to get wider and quicker reach. So, I planned a photo-shoot for the 17th October to get formal headshots taken for profile pictures, hence the much needed haircut. LinkedIn should prepare for my arrival.

My birthday came up on the 18th, and for some reason, I was feeling a little anxious for days leading up to it. Thinking about it now, I think it came from the pressure of thinking I needed to do something big, make a huge gesture for being able to see today, because a year ago on the same day, I was still on chemo and fearing for my life. I guess it comes from this “survivorship” culture that surrounds especially October, it being the Breast Cancer Awareness month; a lot of brands going pink, a lot stories online about how “I survived cancer so I ran a marathon and kissed the Pope’s ring and swam in a volcano”. So exhausting to read, it always left me with some sense of responsibility or need to do something grand too, to show my thanks to the Universe for sparing my life.

But thankfully, I was able to silence that need by focusing on the plans I was laying down for the rebranding of Modd 2.0, which was more of a priority for me.

*

Photo shoot day arrived, makeup done and I was ready to go. I thought about how the price given by Studio 24 for a formal headshot shoot was a little on the high side. So I asked the makeup artist if she knew of any other good studios. She did and for a fraction of the price too. I was sold, because my mama didn’t raise no fool. I called to book a slot, threw my things in the car and headed out there. Everything went great with the shoot, but it kind of went a little out of control after I got offered a package with unlimited shots, unlimited outfit change and any props I wanted. Before I knew what was happening, I was straddling a white bicycle holding a bouquet of flowers and pushing my ass out in a way that Beyoncé would have approved of. It escalated further with me laying on pink rose petals and white number cut-outs next to me to signify my age.

Well fuck me! I guess we are doing a birthday shoot then!

Since completing treatment and finally being in remission, I hadn’t had this much unhindered fun in a while. It was good for my soul. The fact that it was totally unplanned made it even more interesting. I wasn’t feeling any pressure any more. I was just at peace. I left there feeling optimistic and hopeful for things to come.

*

18th October, birthday finally here, still riding on the high of the previous day, so I just spent the day chilling with a permanent smile on my face. Protests kept everyone away, except my sister and her kids. So I had my time to myself. Woke up super late, had breakfast, handed over the chores to my sis and went back to bed. I heard the kids downstairs tearing apart the living room as I was falling asleep. Usually I would be ticked off, but today, that didn’t even give me pause. Life is good, and las-las, we go dey alright.

Written by Modd