K’osidim n’obi
I happened on Kito Diaries roughly a year and half ago. I was just eighteen, in the closet, and trying to focus on starting a career. I was in my first year in school, and was confused about my sexuality.
I won’t say I grew up in a strict family. No. On the contrary, mum and dad were pretty liberal. At a point, they stopped going to church entirely because they felt the messages were getting mixed, and they weren’t getting what they wanted. “I’d rather pray in my own home over a plate of eba and egusi soup and drench my sorrows in white wine,” my mother would joke. I was eleven at the time.
Well back to my discovery of KD, I had just met Zilayefa, and I happened to ask him one morning: What are you up to this morning?
Eating breakfast and going through Kito Diaries, he typed back.
Those were the words that changed my life for good. Before then, I’d never heard of Kito Diaries.
I looked up the blog and I came upon the posts of the day. After going through these updates, I shut the site down, not believing anything so “vulgar” could exist. I mean, I was a walking, talking, breathing sin. I was gay! We were all destined to burn in hell, weren’t we? Why brandish our sinful lives and stories before the world? I was filled with guilt at what I’d seen and read, and I vowed never to go through that vile blog again.
Toward evening, my fingers found their way back to my phone. I’d heard of single moments defining people’s lives, but I’d never believed it till then. I felt this strong confidence growing, this deep pride, this hope. It was like an instant crossover. I’d spent my life looking at the world through a screen; finally I could step out. I could breathe. I could unapologetically be ME!
I’ve never looked back since that day. I wanted to have a voice. I wanted to reach out, to peel the blindfold off, to scratch and bite till we were all free. The idea of this series has always been on my mind since then; I guess I just never felt ready enough.
My solution to every gay man seeking freedom has always been Kito Diaries, and the best part of it is that this ‘medication’ of mine usually works for them as it did for me.
Every one of you is a piece of work. Lol! But I’d like to say how much you all contribute to getting me where I am now. Especially my dear Zilayefa, you have been an awesome friend.
I have seen and had my own share of LGBT experiences. I was helped by the sharing of yours, every KDian, and hopefully I can help others by sharing mine. K’osidim n’obi is my opportunity to let it all out, to strip (figuratively).
My name is Kainene. I will be turning twenty in three months time. And I am a homosexual man.
YES! *swelling with pride*
Finally I have conquered the “homo” word. *giggles*
See y’all next week.
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19 Comments
doe eyed monster
October 10, 06:46Awww…we await you dear.. Paint those rainbow colours in all their glory #anticipate
Absalom
October 10, 07:20Here for it. ?
Mandy
October 10, 07:36This episode/pilot entry is just a testament of survival. 😀 Good one, Kainene.
Vile blog, eh? ?????? You tried it.
Frank_Einstein
October 10, 07:37I can’t wait!
Jo
October 10, 08:02Ride on bro… (no pun intended). Some of us may just find the courage to confront our fears
McGray
October 10, 08:14That name Kainene reminds me of my crush in Half of a Yellow Sun. Nwanne m jisie ike, we await u. Pinky hs really done more than enough to earn himself a VIP apartment in Heaven
Bain
October 10, 08:51true talk
SillyAnonymous
October 10, 09:24Hush Child, lest Pinky’s head gets too big for the pearly gates.
shuga chocolata
October 10, 15:50#idied
Whitney
October 10, 08:50Kainene___let’s be watching.
Nice piece. Here has been my home. When I’m weary I’d just come in to have rest.
posh6666
October 10, 09:09And wat does this igbo word mean exactly pls?
Jacques Dubois
October 10, 10:00K’osi dim n’obi means ‘As it is in my heart’
Ivory Child
October 10, 09:25@ Posh666 what Whitney said
Delle
October 10, 11:03Yasss! I’d just have to order cartons of Pink Lady to go with this.
zilayefa
October 10, 11:57(in slow movement) Well Manicured nails covered in metallic Grey Polish, picks up wine glass, sips gently, turns head slightly, points jaw in the air, smiles and swells with pride….. see you darling….. Always remember to BE…..sprinkles glam dust of Kainene. Je’bili!
dontdropthathun
October 10, 13:37Yassssss ??????? …Xx
Mister Em
October 10, 15:18Kainene. You are preaching to the choir. Kdies opened my eyes to new things and self acceptance. When I discovered I was Hiv+. I was scared I was reacting too easy but I guess bcos Kdies educated me enough. Pinky sure does deserve a price for this. Preferably a Nobel peace price.
swanky
October 11, 16:50The positive impact of kd can never be over empasised . I’m more than elated to be here. Any day I didn’t log on to KD, I feel like I got hit by a truck. Keep up the good work guys. PP I’m proud of you n DM nnmmm “I comment my reserve” you’re awesome.
.•*Sugaar.•*
October 11, 18:33Ha ha ha oh blood of God! Ah, Jesus…
I just want to give a shout out to all members, of this blog and the entire administration….
Allah ya albarkace ku. (God bless ya)
Long live KITODIARIES
✋? My allegiance to ya’