Shawn Mendes is so over being called gay

Canadian singer Shawn Mendes has opened up about how he feels about everyone thinking that he’s gay: he doesn’t like it.

He recently sat down with Rolling Stone and the issue of gay rumors came up.

“I’d like to say I don’t care about it, but that’s not true,” he confessed.

“This massive, massive thing for the last five years about me being gay,” he explained. “In the back of my heart, I feel like I need to go be seen with someone – like a girl – in public, to prove to people that I’m not gay.”

And yes, guys, he knows that feeling that way isn’t a good thing.

“Even though in my heart, I know that it’s not a bad thing,” he said, “there’s still a piece of me that thinks that. And I hate that side of me.”

The rumors have him second-guessing everything he does. Mendes often finds himself watching his own interviews, analyzing his voice and his body language. He’ll see an anonymous stranger comment on the way he crossed his legs once and try not to do it again. When Taylor Swift posted a video of him wearing glitter eyeshadow, he said he felt “sick.”

“I felt sick,” he admitted. “I was like, ‘Fuck, why did I let her post that?’ I just fed the fire that I’m terrified of.”

He said that kind of pressure to “come out” whether gay or not can prove dangerous.

“I thought, ‘You fucking guys are so lucky I’m not actually gay and terrified of coming out.’ That’s something that kills people,” he argued. “That’s how sensitive it is. Do you like the songs? Do you like me? Who cares if I’m gay?”

Gay or not, Mendes has proven himself to be an LGBT ally. In May, he came out in support of his friend and song-writer Teddy Geiger who had recently transitioned to female.

“Let somebody be and feel and live how they want to live,” he said at the time.