FIRST TIME: THE RETRIBUTION

FIRST TIME: THE RETRIBUTION

Previously on Max’s story of his First Time

*

Darkness and despair overtook me, I felt like I’d been hit by a fast moving train. I sobbed uncontrollably, and while in my grief, I never felt lonelier. There was no one I could talk to and there was nothing in this world that could console me. I felt betrayed, used. I felt like a loser. The next two days were spent indoors, wallowing in the shadows and barely eating anything. I was hurting from the living nightmare I’d witnessed days before. I still couldn’t believe it; all the good memories Danny and I shared made the agony more excruciating.

By the third day, I shed my misery and felt another kind of emotion begin to take life in me. It was rage. I was done crying and was slowly coming to the resolution that I’d never cry over a man for this reason ever again. Anger festered inside me. I wanted blood, Danny’s blood, and I was out to get it. He couldn’t just jilt me and go scot free. Mbanu! I was going to show him what it felt like to be hurt. I also don’t respond well to threats, and the one he’d slammed me with, about outing me to my family spurred me into thinking of a pre-emptive attack on him.

I thought of a lot of things I could do to him that would hurt him. The thought of killing him crossed my mind. The rage that burned inside me made me reason that the only way to silence the threat of someone outing you would be to terminate it.  Eventually, I settled on two options. I was first going to burn down his room, and thereafter lead a coup to impeach him as the class rep, seeing as he loved that job so much. It would be nice to make him taste his own venom.

I began working on my plan, plotting and finessing my mission to get back at Danny. It was going to be flawless. He wasn’t really a good class rep to start with; he was sloppy, and because of that, I figured his impeachment would come swiftly. I began monitoring him and his movements so I could know the best time to strike with my arsenic intention. I surveilled him for two weeks to know his routines. And by a Friday evening, everything was set. I knew Danny’s schedule enough to know that he wouldn’t be at home at the time. I had a plastic bottle of sprite, one which I filled it with petrol before sealing off with its cap. I went through my laundry and grabbed an unwashed handkerchief, folded it and put it in my pocket. I went into my kitchen and grabbed a lighter (I made sure I flicked it off and on to ensure it was working). And then I set off. A Molotov cocktail seemed ideal to use in this situation; it would create a quick fire without a trace.

The house Danny was staying in was a private hostel off campus with plenty rooms. It was secluded enough to conceal me from getting noticed as I sneaked in. By the time I got to the hostel, it was already dark. Everywhere was quiet and I proceeded to his window, which I’d discovered during my surveillance he always left open for some unknown reason. I peeped into the room to make sure no one was inside. I knew he wouldn’t be home, but I had to make sure. The aim was to make him hurt, not kill him.

I brought out the lighter, and flicked it on. I was about to set the flame on my makeshift incendiary device, when I heard laughter coming from a room nearby. It was a girl’s voice, a peaceful laugh, a sound which stirred something inside me. It made me pause for a moment to think. I began to realize that I hadn’t thought this through. I wanted to hurt Danny, but I could end up hurting other people in the process, people who had nothing to do with the hurt I was feeling. I thought about how easily fire could spread, and how quickly it could turn to a mass murder if the fire wasn’t quenched on time. The fact that we didn’t have a fire service in school made that thought all the more realistic. I thought about the other people in other rooms and how their lives were going to change, and how their deaths or misfortune might affect their loved ones.

In that instant, I turned off the lighter, took a step back from the window, and turned and left.

As I abandoned Plan A, I firmed up my mind on Plan B. Danny would suffer, and I was going to be the one to bring the suffering to him. In the following days, I began creating negative press about him in class, and also actively began leading a huge propaganda against him. My class held a series of departmental meetings which mostly ended in fights with me at the center of it. I was known in class as a bit of a troublemaker, and here, I was in my element. Most of my course mates couldn’t understand why I’d suddenly turned against someone who they knew was my best friend. I didn’t offer up any explanations. I simply soldiered on.

After a few weeks of back-and-forth disagreements and disputes, I succeeded in impeaching him. Another election was held and he was replaced. I felt victorious for the first few days, especially when I observed that the impeachment really got to him; he became withdrawn in class, pulling back from all those I’d rallied to vote him down. In my own case, he deliberately maintained a very wide berth from me. However, his misfortune didn’t do much to soothe the hurt that was still swirling inside me. I had to be in the same class with him for the next four years of my life, watching him talk and laugh with other people, day after day, week after week. I grew to hate his face, his voice, his footsteps and anything associated with him. The hate eventually fueled me with the power I needed to detach myself emotionally from him.

During our final year in school, he approached me in what was going to be the first time we’d interact with each other since all that ugliness years ago, and he said to me, “What happened to us? We used to be best friends.”

I replied, “You know what happened to us. Don’t ask me that. And there’s no need crying over spilled milk.”

After that brief exchange, he started trying to get close to me again, but his charm just wasn’t working anymore. In the time since our breakup, I had lost my naiveté. I had met a good number of people, broken a few hearts, become wiser and emotionally stronger to deal with stuff. I wasn’t 18 anymore. I had already started growing into the man I am today.

In the end, I forgave him, and took the power he had over me emotionally away from him. The wallet I’m using today was given to me by him as a parting gift upon graduation from school. Forgiveness is the key. It frees you from the hurt and the pain, and makes everything better.

Written by Max

Previous Morning Humour XXIV: The Fastest Conversion Therapy In History
Next Georgia, USA Could Lose Super Bowls And Hollywood If Antigay Bill Signed

About author

You might also like

Our Stories 0 Comments

#HowIResist Campaign 5

The law that criminalizes homosexuality … shows a failure of our democracy, because the mark of a true democracy is not in the rule of its majority but in the

Our Stories 7 Comments

A STORY ABOUT LOVE

The first time you meet Lex is in a non-conventional way. It is at a meeting of community members. He looks so fine and fresh in his mostly-red outfit. You

Our Stories 1Comments

UNFAITHFUL 2: BOYFRIEND

Gay models In my last Unfaithful article, I proposed a theory that maybe the reason most gay men find it difficult going mono is because we grew up without models

43 Comments

  1. Colossus
    March 20, 07:02 Reply

    “Forgiveness is the key. It frees you from the hurt and the pain, and makes everything better”

    You sure hun? You really feeling better?

  2. Dubem
    March 20, 07:05 Reply

    This is a chilling story.

  3. Mandy
    March 20, 07:09 Reply

    Ok, so that explains your history with IH guys.
    When are we getting the stories that explain your history with hoes and MG? 😀

    PS: You have some serious darkness frothing inside you, man.

    • Delle
      March 20, 07:52 Reply

      I swear Mandy, a deep swirling one

  4. ambivalentone
    March 20, 07:32 Reply

    Wait!!! This is some truly violent shii. Arson??? I almost stopped reading at that point. God!

  5. Delle
    March 20, 07:50 Reply

    My God, this was a scary read. You did all these? I wonder how you could get so hard-heartedly violent and at the same time have a little conscience as to let ‘peaceful’ laughter stop your intentions, really confusing persona.
    Remind me never to get on your bad side…jeez!

  6. Francis
    March 20, 07:52 Reply

    Some things are not meant to be shared with the public and this is one of them. Jeeeeeeez!

    • Francis
      March 20, 07:54 Reply

      Seriously you need to see a shrink STAT!

      • Pink Panther
        March 20, 08:13 Reply

        Lmao. Francis is horrified. Dude, are those goose bumps I see on your arms? 😀

        • Francis
          March 20, 08:29 Reply

          One of my worst fears till date is dating a psychopath. ??

            • Francis
              March 20, 12:10 Reply

              ??? This kain gist dey make being single look sexy.

  7. prez
    March 20, 09:26 Reply

    Max! Max!! Max!!! would really love to meet you, ur mind interests me. What do you say?

  8. JustJames
    March 20, 09:43 Reply

    Here’s a thought.. what if he did succeed in burning the place but won’t say Cause it’d implicate him.. Max are you sure you’re telling the whole truth.

    At least you’ve proved beyond doubt that you’re psychotic.

    • Tiercel de Claron
      March 20, 16:03 Reply

      He told the truth as concerns that part,we had no story of such happening circa the time he was in school

  9. GBTS
    March 20, 10:28 Reply

    This was a little disturbing to read. I had to force myself to read on. I think you need to forgive yourself as well. And ask the young man to forgive you for instigating his impeachment only because he could not reciprocate a feeling he probably couldn’t quite understand.

    • Max 2.1
      March 20, 11:52 Reply

      Smh.. A feeling he couldn’t understand? After how many months of enjoying what came with the feeling? **sigh*

  10. Jamie
    March 20, 10:45 Reply

    That boy was quite stronger and more matured than you in all ramifications… You needed some help psychologically, and I’m hoping you’ve had it. You SERIOUSLY NEED A COUNSELLOR!! I get aggressive too when offended but,…I just got scared!!!

    • Max 2.1
      March 20, 11:53 Reply

      Easy for you to say, when you aren’t the one who wore the shoes.. Until it happens to you… Until it does.. You wouldnt know..

      • Jamie
        March 20, 14:12 Reply

        Hmmm… I didn’t mean it in a bad light at all… I’ve been through that, and I compared myself to you, and I thought you might just need what I need. Only difference is that I considered a lot of bad things, but love overshadowed and I didn’t try any of them. If your boyfriend left a week after your last meeting to where you dunno, and his family tells you he’s gone to the seminary, wouldn’t you be wearing that same shoe you wore at that time the above happened?

    • Delle
      March 20, 15:23 Reply

      Okay, there are more Chuckies here than I thought. Aarrrgghh! *flies away*

  11. Wayfaring Stranger
    March 20, 12:35 Reply

    You should have found a way to take something valuable from his room, destroy it and leave the pieces at his door. You flopped.

    • Absalom
      March 20, 14:55 Reply

      Brethren, we have another WITCH!!! *church erupts in wild joy*

  12. Mitch
    March 20, 15:25 Reply

    I like the darkness in you, Max. It’s grotesque yet beautiful. And I like that through that haze of rage and hate, you were still in control. You are one heck of a person.

  13. A-non
    March 20, 15:28 Reply

    I think we all respond to negative emotions differently.

    If Max had spoken to someone about his hurt, perhaps he might not have gone as far as he did. Talking about it would have made the pain light and a lot more bearable and would have healed a lot quicker.

    We might not be responsible for people’s action but we are ultimately responsible for our reaction to their actions.

  14. Santa Diaba
    March 20, 15:39 Reply

    This is nice. I admire the energy you put into your revenge. I personally find revenge stressful. I find many things stressful actually…. ?

  15. Tiercel de Claron
    March 20, 15:50 Reply

    Forgiveness?.Not sure you know the meaning of the word,seeing as you’re still swirling in pain and bitterness.
    Face up to the truth,you’re yet to forgive Danny.Know the truth and set yourself free.

    • Max 2.1
      March 20, 16:32 Reply

      Coming from someone who haven’t met me in real life.. *sigh*

      • Tiercel de Claron
        March 20, 17:18 Reply

        *sigh*
        You do realize I know you,don’t you Max?
        And yes,I’ve come across you tho u didn’t know it.

        What I’m about here is that you still have a lot of truths to face up to.About yourself and your past.You once taunted Peak about fighting his demons,you’re yet to challenge yours.Do so,forgive yourself and heal.

        Oh,before you come at me with that,I’ve worn a shoe worse than yours so I understand well how bad it could be.

  16. Somebody
    March 20, 16:20 Reply

    First Time: The Birth of a Psychopath… That should be the title of the next installment…

    • Max 2.1
      March 20, 16:31 Reply

      ??… You’re cute to watch on ur #JudgementalThrone

      • Somebody
        March 20, 20:34 Reply

        I’m not judging, just stating facts
        BTW I’ll read that installment… You should start a new segment on KD – “Psycho Diaries”

        • Francis
          March 20, 20:44 Reply

          ???? with a touch of ratchet behaviour

  17. Lorde
    March 20, 17:19 Reply

    Awwww, I just love me some sweet revenge, move over Emily Thorne, there’s a new b*tch (sorry fr d language) in town

  18. J0j0
    March 20, 19:37 Reply

    #IAmNotMax ….. so going with this trend

Leave a Reply