The Question about Love And Strength…
Two gay Nigerian men, Chidi and Taiwo, go to a bar and fall in love with each other at first sight. Unfortunately, they can’t be together – but for totally different reasons.
Here’s what Chidi thinks while gazing into his lover’s eyes:
‘I’m believe I’m in love with him… I can’t say it any other way
He makes me feel like someone else… And brightens up my day
There’s so much that I want to say… But I’m afraid of his response
It’s very easy to fall in love… But it’s hard when you’re not loved back
I’ve tried to bring myself to tell him the truth… But I always end up backing out
Fear of rejection overwhelms me… Of all my fears, that is the loudest
But then, he’s like no one I’ve met before… He is one in a million
But I suspect he has heard this before, more times than a billion
But it’s coming from me… Surely that has to count for something
And yet, there’s this small still voice in my head
Telling me that if I say how I feel, he may not feel the same way for me.’
And across from him, Taiwo is caught up in his thoughts too:
‘I see him looking at me… But I can’t tell what he feels
What I’d give to know his heart… And all that is in it.
I’ve loved him from the very beginning… Since he smiled at me
But I’ve never had the courage to express the way I feel
I am constantly surrounded by my family and friends… What will they think?
A man who proclaims his love for a man… They will hate me for it
I wish I can say ‘Enough’… And damn everyone and every circumstance
But I am not brave enough, to discover what follows after I dare everything for him
Perhaps a time will come in this lifetime… Or hopefully the very next
When guys like us will be free to do the things we have been forbidden to do
Until then however, I am swamped by this sinking realization
That I have the strength to love him, but I am not strong enough to love him.’
I watch the two gay Nigerian men, Chidi and Taiwo from across the bar. I am a protégé of Professor Xavier, so I can get into their minds to see their thoughts and understand their fears.
And now, I ask: Does anyone have an idea how both their fears are different?
Written by Reverend Hot
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9 Comments
Mandy
October 12, 09:18Hmmm, an impromptu Monday quiz. *tapping pen on exam paper while reading thru Question Number 1a one more time*
Max
October 12, 09:24I’ll have to read again to be able to answer this Jamb question since their fears seem alike.
Pink Panther
October 12, 09:25Oh there’s a difference. At first read, when Rev. Hot sent it to me, I didn’t see it too. lol
Max
October 12, 09:28Ok, now I get it.
Chidi is scared of rejection, he fears that Taiwo may not love him back.
Taiwo is scared of his family, he’s scared of what might happen if they found out about his love for men. He’s not really bothered about unreciprocated love.
Delle
October 12, 09:35Really? That’s how the question comes? Was I supposed to read those poetic lines as individual thoughts 4rm both actors…or was that just what it looked (and sounded) like…a POEM!
Ok like a good scholar…I feel they are both in love with each other, that’s first. But Chidi is in love but fears to be rejected by Taiwo. Taiwo is in love but fears rejection from the world!
Touche…*drops pad in satisfaction*
Uziel
October 12, 10:38Reverend, this is an excellent idea I’ve been researching on in my spare time (yeah, things like this interests me).
Anyway, here’s what I’ve learnt so far, and unsuprisingly, it’s the answer to your question. VULNERABILITY. Both men, and most of us are vulnerable, and that allows the fear they have. The fear of being discovered and the fear of being rejected. It would take courage (in the real meaning of the word) for them to overcome their fears and be happier.
Pink Panther
October 12, 10:40The fear of being discovered.
The fear of being rejected.
Very real fears, those.
ronniephoenix
October 12, 16:03For me, I don’t give a shit.
I like you and I say it.
But then fears are real, they can kill.
(Speaking from experience).
Jamie
October 12, 17:05Hmm… I kinda love this question…though I’m not sure I know the correct answer…
The first person is afraid of love; the second needs an opportunity to love!!