The things that happen when you are out to your family.

You forget to hide.

You forget how to be conscious of the things you’d ordinarily shield from the notice of your family members.


Like (1).

My brother had finished making dinner, and called out to me from the kitchen, wanting to know if I wanted to eat. I hollered back yes. I was in the bedroom, downloading some porn that a friend sent to me. My laptop was right there, with the browser open, and there were naked men splashed all over the screen.

My brother walked in with a plate, and even as he approached the table where I was seated, I legit did not remember that GAY PORN WAS OPEN ON MY LAPTOP. It wasn’t until he had gotten to the table to drop the plate in an angle that would cause him to see the laptop screen, that I suddenly realised with a jolt what was on my screen.

The age-old instinct of one who has been hiding all his life kicked in and I instantly wanted to snatch my mouse and click off the browser.

That instinct lasted a second, before I squashed it with the thought that came to my head: He knows you’re gay. He knows you have sex with men. What do you want to hide?

So, I didn’t do anything. I watched him as he dropped the plate, caught a glimpse of my laptop screen, chuckled, shook his head and walked out of the room.


Like (2).

I brought out my traveling bag and dropped it open on the bed. I was ransacking for some stuff, and when I found what I was looking for, I dumped everything back into the bag in a disordered heap. I didn’t even bother to arrange them properly before going about my business.

A few hours later, I was in the room, working at my laptop when my father walked in to talk to me. I noticed him looking at the disorganised heap on my bag.

Then I noticed him looking at one thing in particular.

My heart stopped when I saw my father looking at the box inside which I’d kept my condoms and lubes. The very white noticeable box was sitting right on top of everything else on the bag.

I watched my father pick it up and squint at the lettering on the box. The words I later checked which read:





The words were printed on the WHITE box in CAPITAL BLACK LETTERS.

And my father read it all.

In my mind, I was like, “Please, don’t open it, please don’t open it.” But Satan was not on my side.

My father opened the box, and in my mind, I could see what he was seeing: the red-coloured packs of condoms scattered amidst the blue-coloured packs of lubricant.

The age-old instinct of one who has been hiding all his life wanted me to start praying for the ground to open and swallow me whole.

That instinct lasted a second, before I squashed it with a thought: He knows you’re grown. He knows you’re having sex. At least, he sees you’re being careful about it.

My father dropped the box back on the bag, looked at me, chuckled, shook his head and asked me what I thought about the attire he was wearing.

You come out to your family, and you start forgetting that you are supposed to hide.

It’s a very strange feeling when you no longer feel like you have to hide.

Written by Pink Panther

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  1. Kwinmoda
    January 26, 08:05 Reply

    This one is doing me like film trick, like can this really happen in this Nigeria?

  2. Kenny
    January 26, 08:57 Reply

    I can so relate…..

    1).My sister walked into my room, I had my head in my friend’s laps he was stroking my head. I didn’t even flinch when she came in. She wasn’t surprised as well, she got what she wanted and left.

    2). My mum sometimes calls me when I’m at my ‘friend’s’. She
    asks about him and my sister knows him as well.. Sometimes she ends the conversation with let your sister know if you won’t be going home tonight, be safe.


    • Francis
      January 26, 09:01 Reply

      So Mumsy don finally relax. Lol. So happy for you ??

      • Kenny
        January 26, 09:33 Reply

        Yea she has. Since last year ☺️?

    • Mandy
      January 26, 10:03 Reply

      Have we read the story of this your journey with your mom here? ??

      • Kenny
        January 26, 10:46 Reply

        Someday soon… I’ll write about it

  3. Mandy
    January 26, 10:02 Reply

    Lol. Turns out the condom you lost in the living room wouldn’t have mattered had your dad seen it.
    Your father is “parent of a gay son” goals. Has joined Vhar’s mother as the parents we must have.

  4. Peace
    January 26, 10:12 Reply

    Dear Pink panther, you didn’t tell us you had moved to the abload and gotten abload parents there. Did I just read that your dad chuckled, after reading the inscription on the lube box? Impossible!! Someone pinch me.

  5. Dimkpa
    January 26, 10:41 Reply

    Kudos to your dad and brother.

    I guess the apple didn’t fall far from the tree.

    It is admirable that they have accepted both the good and the raunchy aspects of homosexuality.

  6. Bee
    January 26, 12:00 Reply

    If jealousy doesn’t kill me, I wonder what will. ?

  7. LMRN
    January 26, 20:14 Reply

    My sister and I share one Netflix account, she naturally can see all that I watch. My boyfriend knows about this. I told him that I had been binge watching LGBT movies and relaxing with Ru Pauls Drag race, he says “Whooaa, your sister can see that”, and then he remembers that I was already out to her this new year 🙂

  8. Malik
    January 27, 03:01 Reply

    1. I’m out (outted – whatever) to my parents and now they use anointing oil to pray over me every time I want to leave the house.
    2. My mum now frequently asks for when I’m finally going to bring home her “daughter.”

    • Delle
      January 27, 11:51 Reply

      Did they not get your ‘coming out’? Did they not get the memo?

      Maybe you should re-comeout ???

  9. AduResa
    January 27, 18:25 Reply

    LOL. BTW, am i the only who noticed the ass of the guy in the picture up there. lol

  10. Baba
    January 28, 18:10 Reply

    This is so real for me. I was out the other day in my dyed hair and very short shorts, just outside Novare Mall, and two guys in a car on the other side of the road slowed down and screamed GAY. I had completely forgotten people were still homophobic because I’m out to my family, my friends, and my coworkers.

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