I need advice on this.

So there’s this lady, a nurse here in Bayelsa who I call my ‘mummy’, because she’s like a mother to me. She is quite advanced in age, but unmarried. And she knows about my sexual orientation, yes. She once saw lots of gay porn on my phone the day she was looking at my pic. So I had to come out to her, and she responded with the reassurance that it doesn’t change our relationship. She promised that she was cool with who I am. And she subsequently showed some curiosity on the gay issue, frequently asking for lectures on Gay Sex 101. Our talks on the subject were always fun.

Anyway, there’s this suitor that she’s been telling me about recently. And then, last week Thursday, she told me the guy would be coming over on Saturday, and would be staying a whole week. I couldn’t wait to meet him; she’d told me so much about him.

Finally, it was Saturday, and in the evening, I was in front of the hospital with her, waiting to receive her man friend. And then he arrived. Lo and behold, he was James (not real name) – the very first guy I had my first gay sex with back in December 29 2010 (the date I was disvirgined into the gaybourhood is etched on my mind). We however lost contact after then. And on this moment, he was more than a little surprised to see me. But I didn’t give him the chance to decide how to react to my presence. I immediately began to act like we’d never met before. I greeted him, took his bags, and dropped them off at my mummy’s house. I announced my intention to leave, and my mummy was like, ‘Ah-ah, so fast?’ James added that he hoped he was not pursuing me. I had to give an excuse that I had something urgent to rush off to.

On Monday, she called me, asking me to please keep her man company, because she would be on call that night. I agreed and went over to her house. It was awkward between James and I at first. We didn’t know where to start, what to say to each other. And then, he was like, he lost my contact and had searched for how to reconnect with me to no avail. I didn’t say anything, or perhaps, I didn’t know what to say. I just kept on smiling. It got so awkward that I had to leave.

Then, yesterday morning, mummy called me to gush some more about her man, how she adores him and all that. Then she was like, ‘My dear, how you see am?’ She wanted to know what I thought about him. I told her he’s cool. She said he was asking her a lot of questions about me. I was like, really. She said yes. Our talk soon ended.

And now, I feel like I have to do something. I just don’t know what. I feel like I owe it to her to tell her the truth. Or perhaps I should simply keep quiet and watch as things go on. She has been so much to me, means so much to me, and I don’t know which obligation would hurt the most in the long run, my silence or my honesty.

Submitted by Fabby