The following are true stories.

On the 26th of May, 2003, Aron Ralston was hiking when a boulder fell on his right hand. He waited four days, and then amputated his arm with a pocket knife.

On New Year’s Eve, a woman was bungee-jumping in Zimbabwe. The cord broke, and she fell into a river and had to swim back to land through the crocodile-infested waters with a broken collarbone.

Claire Champlin was smashed in the face by a five-pound watermelon being propelled by a slingshot.

Matthew Brobst was hit by a javelin.

David Striegl was punched in the mouth. By a kangaroo.

The most amazing part about these stories is when asked about the experience they all smiled, shrugged, and said, “I guess things could have been worse.”

So go ahead.

Tell me that you’re having a bad day.

Tell me about the traffic. Tell me about your boss.

Tell me about the job you’ve been trying to quit for the past four years.

Tell me the morning is just a townhouse burning to the ground, and the snooze button is a fire extinguisher. Tell me the alarm clock stole the keys to your smile, drove it into 7:00 AM, and the crash totaled your happiness.

Tell me! Tell me!

Tell me, how blessed are we to have tragedies so small it can fit on the tips of our tongues?

You see, when Biodun lost his legs, he was speechless. When my cousin was assaulted, she didn’t speak for forty eight hours. When I lost my friend, my family and friends had to send out a search party to find my voice.

Most people have no idea that tragedy and silence have the exact same address.

When your day is a museum of disappointments hanging from events that are outside of your control, when you find yourself flailing in an ocean of “Why is this happening to me?”, when it feels like your guardian angel put in his two-week notice two months ago and just decided not to tell you, when it feels like God is just a babysitter that’s always on the phone, when you get punched in the esophagus by a fistful of life, remember that every year, two million people die of dehydration. So it doesn’t matter if the glass is half full or half empty, there’s water in the cup.

Drink it, and stop complaining.

Muscles are created by repeatedly lifting things that have been designed to weigh us down. So when your shoulders feel heavy, stand up straight and lift your chin – call it exercise.

When the world crumbles around you, you have to look at the wreckage and then build a new one out of the pieces that are still here.

Remember, you are still here.

The human heart beats approximately four thousand times per hour.

Each pulse, each throb, each palpitation is a trophy engraved with the words “You are still alive”.

You are still alive.

Act like it.

Written by Vhar

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Fear is good; it reminds us we’re still alive. Courage is better; it helps us navigate strategically beyond fear. * 2: 14 am The night was alive with the croaking


  1. A-non
    April 21, 04:30 Reply

    It’s in the little things…

    A bed to sleep on, three meals per day, a job to go to, a family to come home to, clothes on my back, few but loyal friends, my youth, my dreams, my good health, a good education.

    These may sound ordinary but in a society as ours, it’s a lot to have.

    Thanks Vhar for reminding us of the joy of counting ‘small’ blessings.

    • Vhar.
      April 21, 05:29 Reply

      The little things, just like little drops of water, go a long way.
      Thank you.

  2. justme
    April 21, 04:50 Reply

    wow….awesome……like I need d reminder….thanks vhar

  3. Dennis Macaulay
    April 21, 05:03 Reply

    Vhar this is a nice read, however I dont always buy this kind of “get up and go” philosophy! Sometimes when life kicks me in the gut I want a friend who will sit and cry with me, not one that will yell “get over it”.

    Sometimes I sit and cry and feel and sorrow without being made to feel like an ingrate who isnt grateful for the other things he has. I think sometimes I am entitled to those off days!

    • pinkpanthertb
      April 21, 05:06 Reply

      True. Sometimes, a little cry helps. Strength should not be about shelving those feelings of vulnerability and ploughing on. It’s about giving in to them every now and then, but not letting the self pity overtake you.

      • Vhar.
        April 21, 05:24 Reply

        “… It’s about giving in to them every now and then, but not letting the self pity overtake you”.

        But Dennis Macaulay… This isn’t Philosophy.

    • Lothario
      April 21, 06:28 Reply

      Some people don’t know how to have a good cry and.get on with life…..they just want to have a pity party day in day out……jeez!

  4. Gad
    April 21, 05:16 Reply

    When peace like a river attendeth my way. When sorrows like sea billows rolls. Whatever my lot.. it is well with my soul. Vhar,this is a very beautiful one. Well done

  5. JArch
    April 21, 05:30 Reply

    It’s ok to whine and complain and cry. I’ve been down this “It could have been worse” road before and it’s only a temporary bandaid for encouragement

    OAN: Am I the only one who thought it funny about the guy who was punched by a kangaroo. I kept picturing a kangaroo with boxing gloves in my head lol

    • trystham
      April 21, 07:17 Reply

      looool. There were loads of humorous statements in there. But as short as them roos hands are, they pack a mighty grip n punch

  6. #TeamKizito
    April 21, 05:58 Reply



    (God I thank you for Vhar’s life. I thank you for my life.)

    Vhar, you know I love you right? Don’t think about the fact that I don’t know what you look like or you don’t know what I look like and you, see, Vhar, I don’t know what I’m doing. I just..I..oh, Vhar! :s

    Vhar Vhar Voomie.

  7. Mitch
    April 21, 06:31 Reply

    Thank you Vhar. This is amazing.

  8. Teflondon
    April 21, 06:59 Reply

    You just find a way to blow me away.. With each new post written by you.. This piece right there is what I needed ATM..
    I’m the type to complain abt every and any little thing that doesn’t go my way.. I’m spoilt like that. I’m not contented with my awesome job cause it’s not an Oil company.. I’m not contented with the fact that I have to jump buses in this insane lagos traffic every now and then.. Even Tho I have car. Im not contented with the facts that I don’t have an insanely gorgeous GF to get home to just like my Frnd’s (I’m Bi) I’m not contented with so many things but I always forget that I still have so much more than a lot of people could wish and I should be thankful always..
    This piece right here, is a reminder once again that ‘I should stop complaining’

    Thank you once again Vhar for this incredible inspirational piece.

  9. Pisces
    April 21, 07:14 Reply

    *walks into the lobby of KDville,looks towards the LCD display screen,sees todays post,sits beside Vhar* *Reads it amidst tears silently streaming down face causing mascara to streak* *Inhales deeply,reapplies make up and leans towards Vhar*
    ‘Thank you’
    *stands up and walks out towards the revolving door,determined to give Living a new meaning*

    • sinnex
      April 21, 13:44 Reply

      Now, I don’t know why, but this touched me. Pisces I think I am in love with you.

      • Colossus
        April 21, 15:31 Reply

        Wait, that’s all that is needed to make you fall in love and hopefully give up the virginity? Ok then, let me give it a try.

        *Walks into the lobby of KDville,looks towards the Ultra HD display screen,sees todays post,sits beside Vhar* *Reads it amidst tears silently streaming down face causing powder to slowly fade away* *Inhales deeply, splashes water on my face, gently reapplies powder and leans towards Vhar*
        ‘Thank you’
        *stands up and walks out towards the revolving door,determined to give Living a new meaning*

        So, fallen in love with me yet? Are your orifices doing you tinigi tinigi?

        • pinkpanthertb
          April 21, 16:07 Reply

          Hahahahahahahaa!!! Colossus ooo! Dios Mios! I’m gasping for breath here

    • Khaleesi
      April 21, 15:52 Reply

      I hope you remembered to wear a pair of elegant high- heeled pumps and you took the time to make sure that the color matched or contrasted well with your mascara as well as your blouse … lol

  10. zinnat
    April 21, 07:28 Reply

    Amazingly splendid. Nice 1 Vhar…..i want to be like you when i grow up. 🙂

    • Colossus
      April 21, 08:58 Reply

      I’m actually intrigued with your moniker, what made you choose the word Zinnat?

      • zinnat
        April 21, 10:09 Reply

        Lool, zinnat is a trade name which is not only restricted to cefuroxime only.

      • Colossus
        April 21, 15:03 Reply

        So why did you choose it? You share some antibiotic properties with Zinnat? Please no offense, I’m genuinely intrigued.

      • zinnat
        April 21, 16:03 Reply

        No particular reason, jst a freestyle.

  11. Ruby
    April 21, 07:50 Reply

    Thank you Vhar!
    This is really a source of encouragement.

  12. Diablo
    April 21, 07:57 Reply

    I actually disagree. If anything I feel we as Nigerians do not complain enough. Its one thing to not complain about a freak accident, especially since regardless of the circumstances, they are unavoidable. But when the avoidable happens, and fundamental rights are being peddled upon ( 14 years anyone? ) with basic amenities lacking ( erratic electricity, bad roads ..et al), then complaining is warranted.

    We forget that for change to start there has to be outcry, collective outcry at that. The revolutions that make the West an envy and a point of reference didn’t happen because ppl stayed numb and consoled themselves that things could be alot worse, they started by folks like you and I, complaining and then revolting. This mentality of assuming that things could’ve been alot worse is a passive way of reasoning, and passive wills will always get trampled upon and exploited.
    We as Nigerian gays shouldn’t get too comfortable abt being grateful for what we have at the moment with the rationale dt its better than nothing, because at the end of the day things could be alot better! Nigerians as a whole have been conditioned to literally die in silence, and this is why our leaders pretty much get away with anything and the average Nigerian cannot express his/her feelings articulately and as such ignorance thrives.

    If we want change, there has to be some complaining! Complaining is the ignition that brings about change, lets not stifle it.

    • Max
      April 21, 08:27 Reply

      This isn’t the piece for that. It just isn’t. This is a totally different thing. We feel the same sentiments about being outcasts in our own country. We do. But this piece is about something else.

    • Teflondon
      April 21, 09:01 Reply

      Daiblo I get were you are coming from.. But this piece is not about that.. It’s about appreciating the little things (or we think they are little) we have.. It’s about appreciating the fact that after all you have mentioned above.. We are still alive (something beyond our control.. Because we don’t chose to be alive) to keep fighting for a better life.. A better Nigeria and a better everything..
      So no Diablo.. This is aint about ‘Change’ but it’s about ‘Appreciation’ its about ‘Not Complaining’ this is about ‘BELIEVING’

    • Colossus
      April 21, 09:05 Reply

      Yes, I agree. Let’s keep complaining, let’s keep screaming till our voices are heard. They can’t keep trampling on our rights, they cans keep telling us not to complain, we won’t have nine of that no more, we shall now be complaining to the high heavens.

      Though this post had nothing to do with your rant but what the heck, make we dey sweat the small stuff dey go.

  13. Max
    April 21, 08:21 Reply

    Omg… I really needed this… Right now. Its been a sad Tuesday morning. Thank you Vhar for lifting my spirit.
    **lots of hug*

  14. Absalom
    April 21, 09:26 Reply

    This is apt, Vhar.

    Sometimes I Google stories of people who have it worse than me: if they can survive their problems why can’t I?

    Thanks for the reminder.

  15. Oluwadamilare Okoro
    April 21, 10:56 Reply

    Wonderfully written… just what I needed today to send this malaria packing.

    Nice one Vhar!

  16. GOld
    April 21, 11:48 Reply

    Well written Vhar.Humans complain just too much.I’m not excluded

  17. tobby
    April 21, 12:37 Reply

    You hear that people?. Never whine!, just suck it up. Losers!

  18. s_sensei
    April 21, 20:18 Reply

    Nothing like a dose of hard facts and bitter truth can lift the spirit of the downcast. That is what I want when I’m blue, and so that is what I give to others. You may think saying “it could have been worse” is just a temporary bandaid but the FACT is that its true. And that’s the difference between the optimist and the pessimist: perspective. The cup that is half full is also half empty. The perspective you choose will either make you sink or help you float. Lovers of misery, I don’t judge you. Justifying your reaction to your circumstance is what makes you what you are; miserable. And you are right. No one has the right to take it from you. Feel free to cry forever. Until you choose to embrace the truth: it could have been worse.

  19. Brian Collins
    April 23, 18:36 Reply

    Very nice Vhar. I needed this with the way my exams are going. Even though things are not so great atleast i know i am not flunking out unlike some people.

  20. Pisces
    April 25, 20:09 Reply

    Hehehe…..@ Khalee .. Of cos you should know i’m not supposed to go out without my customed made hand sewn Ferregamo pumps….and my mascara had a subtle catty aquamarine touch blending with my Blue handpainted peplum gown…. Lets’ just say i learnt from the best there is. *winks*… Lol.

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