Most queer folks would say they were molested, raped or seduced into homosexuality by some uncle, aunty, cousin, house help, friend, neighbor or family friend.

I wouldn’t say that about me. In fact, I was something of a predator. My earliest memories of me engaging in homosexual acts were when I was 6 and always wanting to play with my uncle’s penis whenever we watched movies together or were lounging in his bedroom. He never touched me inappropriately, but he didn’t scold me for always wanting to touch his privates. I’m sure, to him, I was just a kid being a kid.

In the year 2000, I had my first sexual encounter with the landlord’s son. We touched each other and feverishly wanked each other under the stairwell.

In 2004, I gave my first blow job to my twin brother’s friend. We’d been watching straight porn together and so, the konji spirit came upon us so hard that we went from blow job to the first sex I had.

In 2007, I hounded my older cousin to have sex with me. And we did it. Carried on doing it until he relocated.

In 2009, I went to my neighbor’s room to see if I could borrow a film. And I walked in on him watching straight porn and wanking. I asked him if I could stay and watch with him, and he was like, “Sure.” As we watched, the konji spirit was not far. It possessed me and I found myself telling him that I knew how to give a good blow job. He was evidently surprised that I said that. But who was he to pass on such an offer. And so, first came the blow job, and then came the sex.

In 2010, another friend of my twin was staying at our place to write WAEC. That evening we tumbled into bed together happened in such a blur, but it ended with me pleasuring him with my mouth and him pleasuring me with his dick. The next day, he wouldn’t speak to me, and for a week, we didn’t talk to each other. But then, the time came when we were home alone and I suppose that sinful thing he kept on telling me he had never done before the first night we got together, began to seem appealing again. And so, we did it. About an hour of sweaty nastiness.

In 2012, I gave a blow job to the carpenter who came to fix my father’s wardrobe. The blow job of course progressed to him banging my brains out. Please don’t ask how it happened. I’m still nursing that memory close to my heart.

That was the same year I had sex with this very cute shoemaker, who eventually turned out not to be a one-time thing. We carried on with our sexcapades for a few weeks before things cooled off between us.

In 2016, that friend of my twin who couldn’t seem to make up his mind about shagging me or keeping me at arm’s length in 2010 came around, and we happened again. The next day, he sent me a message on Facebook, telling me to pay him off otherwise he would tell my family about what happened the previous night. Someone had come with a plan, it would seem. I ignored his message until he said he wanted 20 grand from me to keep his mouth shut. I couldn’t ignore his message this time. I told him he should do his worst. After all, I was already out to my family. I told him if he should come to my family with any report, I would tell them that he tried to rape me in our house and that he was trying to blackmail me because I’d fought him off and wouldn’t give in to his sexual demand.

After my scathing response, he withdrew. Even though he still came to our house after that incident, we were decidedly no longer friends, sexual or otherwise. Things were so cold between us that even my twin noticed enough to ask me if everything was OK between us.

But you know the ways of the konji spirit are very mysterious. That evening, before he left, he sidled up to me, full of apologies and asking me to please give him a blow job and allow him to fuck me. And I was in a forgiving mood, so we quickly got down to business. A potential blackmailer back in between my thighs.

Things improved between us after that night. We even became quite close, friends with benefits, with him apparently getting comfortable enough with his sexuality to be asking me for sex in the daytime, not minding if anyone was around. Thank God he relocated, because we were almost caught during one particular daytime tryst, when he interrupted my ironing chore.

Recently, at my workplace, there was an apartment that no one was inhabiting. But it was furnished with stuff that could be put up for sale. I was put in charge of the supervision of packaging these items to be sold off. The guy whose job was to do the packaging and moving was some Hausa guy.

One afternoon, we were hard at work (no pun intended) when the konji spirit befell me. I was horny and I’d been admiring the Hausa guy for quite some time. And because my horniness makes me daring (as you can see from my sexual history), I came up with a story, telling him that I’d been injected at the hospital earlier in the day and that my hips were feeling stiff – that could he help massage that area for me?

That was all I said, I swear. But either this guy was a mind reader, was into me too, or was a raging homosexual himself – because the next thing I knew after I asked my “favour”, he was whipping out his dick with a salacious grin on his face.

I was stunned. I hadn’t seen that coming. I mentally asked myself if he’d actually understood exactly what I’d said to him. But I guess I didn’t have much time replying my question. Thank God I always carried condoms about in my wallet.

And, Ohmaigod, he was really good. After we were done, we smiled at each other and he went back to what he was doing.

After that day, I didn’t see him for about 4 weeks. And then, one day he was at my office building. We smiled at each other, and I suddenly remembered that it was just me at my office. I told him to come over to my floor and soon, we were huffing and panting away over a desk. Flashing through the delirious passion was the thought that my boss could get back from court early or the secretary to the other lawyer, who was on leave, might just decide to show up at work in spite of her boss being away. But the konji spirit had taken control and we are but pencils in his hands.

When we were done, he surprised me by asking if I enjoyed it. He said he did, and wanted to know if he could come again for another round next time.

And I smiled as I said he should keep me posted.

Written by DK

Next When Monday Came To Bite Me In The Ass

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  1. Cho
    December 23, 06:10 Reply

    Niceeeeeee…. You’ve lived

  2. Cho
    December 23, 06:11 Reply

    Your cousin though? That’s family…disgusting.

    • Net
      December 23, 18:21 Reply

      Hmm I’m sure most people have a “cousin” story to tell

      • Pink Panther
        December 24, 08:23 Reply

        LMAO! Cousin stories are like a rite of passage in the queer community.

  3. Malik
    December 23, 07:01 Reply

    Oh wow! Inspirational stuff.

    • trystham
      December 23, 08:49 Reply

      ??? walahi, this got me ROTFL and cackling

  4. Thor
    December 23, 07:49 Reply

    Lmao. Can I be your friend? ?

  5. trystham
    December 23, 08:51 Reply

    Please, if u know u had tried calculating his age in ur head, please let’s take group selfie

  6. Jinchuriki
    December 23, 08:53 Reply

    If you didn’t state that you have a twin and work in some law firm, I’d have sent my cousin a weird message rn.

    Oh and Cho…. much weirder things have happened, a lot of them aren’t planned. Eventually you get past them, you need to for sanity’s sake.

  7. Higwe
    December 23, 10:20 Reply

    This story though…. ??

  8. Delle
    December 23, 12:46 Reply

    You’ve had so much balls in you. Umm I meant, you have a lot of balls in you.

    • trystham
      December 24, 06:36 Reply

      They are full up to his guts…sorry, I meant he is full of guts.

  9. Mikkiyfab
    December 23, 13:33 Reply

    I need your life like mad
    Seriously am a fan o

  10. Michael
    December 23, 14:17 Reply

    This is so me this 2018. This year has been do whorible”..

  11. Dickson Clement
    December 23, 16:43 Reply

    This story is not complete, most male identical twins end up sleeping together or at least wanking together! If you slept with ur cousins, then you must tell us how it went with your twin

  12. Peaches
    December 23, 16:45 Reply

    I swear down I had something really similar cooking!… But then your guys blinded me!!!.

  13. DK
    December 23, 23:07 Reply

    Pls dis Story is as Fucking real as you could ever imagine it and this people mentioned here are all my straight folk encounter.
    @DicksonClement, the fact that i slept with my cousin doesn’t mean i would do the same with my Sweet Twin, mind you; he was the first person i came out to and he accepted me just like that. Why not u adopt a twin or if u have a biological bro, tell us your Sex experience with him.
    Pls guy’s, it all happened and am proud about my Konji Spirit Bitch…

  14. DK
    December 23, 23:16 Reply

    @trystham & @jinchuriki keep on calculating age oh, u tink i got time for dumb ass pretentious bitches like you, who claims righteous at all course.
    You know wat, bitch; shove it off your mother fucking ass…

    • keredim
      December 23, 23:58 Reply

      KD admin must have done some serious shit ass Pulitzer prize award winning editing to the original piece.??

      • trystham
        December 24, 06:32 Reply

        Loool. The entire original piece would have been an unending beep were it a movie

        That said @DK, u didn’t have to spoil a good comment wondering at how much guts and dick u have gotten in ur very short life, AND from the cradle no less, with ur crass rejoinder. With that mouth on u, sounding like a gum chewing, Allen prostitute soliciting customers, the jealous respect has changed to disgust.

      • Dammy
        December 24, 23:28 Reply

        I tell you.. @Keredim??

  15. DK
    December 24, 09:59 Reply

    @trystham u have ur own life so live it, wats ur business wit how i run my life and who d fuck did u just call a prostitute.
    Like Seriously
    Pls focus on ur problem and leave others people challengs alone. Thanks Bitch…

  16. Delle
    December 24, 14:47 Reply

    Not to sound salty or anything, but PP is this what you go through with people’s write-ups? Because from this guy’s (unwarranted) clapbacks, it’s obvious his initial story was a catastrophe and had to go through full reassignment surgery to be that up there.

    My goodness!

    • Richie-Michie
      December 24, 23:05 Reply

      Reassignment surgery ???

      Dk calm down, from what I understand trystham wasn’t trying to shame u by attempting to calculate ur age……heck I did. It’s just my brain trying to create a mental picture of the writer. Relax man.

  17. Bhawscity
    December 25, 05:16 Reply

    I just wish we members of this blog go do get together ehh, make i know and see who I go beat for here life.

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