“Declan! Hey, Declan!”

I looked up from my fiscal exchange with the okada man who’d just dropped me before Kema’s address. The young man hastening toward me was dark-complected and tall, with a small paunch which was made more pronounced by the snug T-shirt he was wearing. He also looked familiar.

“H-hey…” I faltered, as I frantically sifted through my memory banks for the name corresponding with the face. My memory was a mess. The task was futile. I offered a small smile as he stopped before me. “Um…”

“Iyke,” he supplied.

The bike man vroomed away.

“Uh, Iyke…”

“Iyke from Ajah.”

“Right.” I snapped my fingers. “From Ajah… from Ajah…”

“You still don’t remember, do you?” He looked amused.

My face heated up with embarrassment as I chuckled. “I’m sorry. I’m usually very bad with placing names with faces.”

“I don’t blame you in this particular instance. After all, we only met – and shagged” – he dropped a heavy stress on the word – “that one time in May.”

And shagged that one time in May.

The tumblers dropped in my head.

Ajah. House party. A feisty round of sex with a generously-endowed stranger whose name I forgot after the sex and whose number I lost the next day.

God, I was such a hoe once upon a time, I thought as I laughed. “Oh my God, Iyke, it’s been so long.”

“Yes, indeed, it has,” he replied, beaming.

“What have you been up to since?”

“School. I just graduated. I’m now waiting for NYSC next year February.”

“Wow, that’s interesting.”

“I lost your number when I switched phones awhile back.”

I’m sure that’s how you lost my number, I thought, still smiling at him. “Yea, me too. My phone was stolen some months ago and I lost yours too.”

“May I have your number back now?”


The exchange of contacts lasted a few seconds.

“Wow, Declan, fancy seeing you after all this time,” Iyke said, appreciatively running his eyes over me.

“You say that like it is destiny or something,” I said, wondering if the sudden impression on his fly was the consequence of a budding hard-on.

“Well, you never know.” He shrugged. “In fact, I haven’t been able to forget that our night together.”

“Oh really?”

“Yea, most especially because of the significance of that day. You remember?”

Of course I did. What Nigerian LGBT member didn’t know about May 29th 2013 – the day the Nigerian Senate passed its stupid antigay bill successfully. Hopefully, the president wouldn’t sign that draconian bill into law. Eddie was optimistic that he wouldn’t. Biola didn’t harbour such hopes.

At my nod, Iyke said, “Well, I’ll buzz you on whatsapp later.”

“Okay then.”

As I made to step around him toward the gate fencing in the block of flats where Kema lived, he asked, “Is this your house?”


“Who are you going to see?”

Are you kidding me? The third degree already? “No one you know,” I replied, and showed my dismissal of him by firmly matching on into the compound.

I was going up in the stairwell when my phone buzzed with the familiar sound of a whatsapp notification. I checked it.

Hey, just thought to holler. The message was from Iyke.


I didn’t bother replying. I was soon let into Kema’s house. His pillowy lips were simply begging to be kissed. I obliged, went into his arms and enjoyed a full minute of lip-locked smooch. I broke the kiss.

“Mmm,” he murmured. “That was delicious, boyfriend.”

My heart constricted a little bit. The last person who’d used that term on me turned out to be a no-good cad. I swiftly pushed Bryson out of my mind and refocused on Kema.

“Well, I think that’s all you’re getting for tonight.”

“Oh come on, why?” Kema whined as I disengaged from him.

“I don’t know…I’ve not been feeling too good today.” I made a face as I began to divest myself of the things I’d come into the house with.

“How is it doing you?” He followed after me into the bedroom.

“I don’t know…my stomach feels weird…”


I gave him a wan smile. “I said my stomach feels weird. There’s no fever or headaches, the symptoms I usually get for malaria.”

“Then it must be hunger. What was the last meal you had?”

“Breakfast –”


I groaned. “Ohm, I’m not even hungry.”

“Shush joor. Get in bed and relax, let me go and whip you up a nice dinner.”

I didn’t need his prompting; I was already crawling into the downy comfort of the bed, relishing the feel of the pillow as I laid my head down. I watched blearily as Kema bustled about the bedroom. He had his laptop open and was booting it on, while connecting the flat hard drive to the computer.

“You seem to be in high spirits, which is unusual for Friday night at home,” I said.

He gave an abashed chuckle. “It’s just…nah, I can’t tell you.”

“Come on!” I protested, my interest piqued. “You don’t get to begin and then refuse to continue.”

“It’s somehow joor.”

“Tell me anyway.”

He hedged, and then came to sit on the bed beside me. “Well, for the first time in my life, I’m about to watch gay porn from start to finish.”

I gave him a blank stare. “Huh?”

“The thing is, all my life, I’ve never watched gay porn, just clips here and there.”

“Wait…” I half-lifted myself from the pillow, one hand gesturing him to pause. “You mean to tell me that in your – how old are you again?”


“So in your thirty years on this God-given, Devil-stunk-up world as a Nigerian gay man, you’ve never seen a full gay adult movie?”



“See? I told you it’s somehow.”

“It is. It really is.” I lay back down. “Carry on.”

“I’ve just never had the daring to go hunting for downloads on the internet, or even the knowledge of how to do so. Today though, Uzoma – you know Uzoma, right?”

I nodded. Another member of Jonathan’s Straight Gay Club.

“Well, he came around to my office. He had his laptop and hard drive with him. During recess, he showed me what I’d never seen before” – Kema’s eyes acquired an extra shine at this moment – “his stack of porn.”

I laughed softly. Oh, you poor baby…

“Mehn, I got busy transferring them to my own hard drive. And tonight, I am going to feast my eyes.” He rubbed his hands together with gleeful anticipation.

As in, he actually rubbed his hands together! Chai!

A wave of nausea rippled through me just then, and I groaned.

“Yes, yes, your food!” Kema became attentive at once, and leaped up from the bed. “Don’t sleep off o, let me go and make you something.”

My body must not have heard him, because a moment after he was out of the room, u began drifting off. My eyes fluttered shut, and my mind began its light conveyance of my paranormal being to the platform beyond Kema’s bedroom.

The journey was slow, hampered by all the physicalness surrounding my body, and so my awareness of my surrounding nearly snapped me back to wakefulness with first the distant aroma of something casseroled, and then the gentle shake of my arm.

But I didn’t wake. I slept on.


The hand shook my body insistently until I drifted up from sleep. I turned a groggy gaze to Kema. His eyes were bright, too bright, and the tip of his tongue was stuck out downward over his lower lip.

“What is it?” I cleared my throat to ask.

“I want you,” he husked.

“What?” I rubbed my eyes, realizing then that I felt marginally better than I was before my slumber. “What do you mean you want me?”

“I want you…I’m so hard…” He moved closer to me on the bed and I felt a stiffness nudge my leg.

“You woke me up for that?” I said incredulously. Then I heard the lowered volume of quasi-erotic sounds coming from the reading table. I glanced over at the flash of skin dominating the laptop screen. I sighed. Oh Kema…

“Please, baby…” His breath fanned my face as he hunched forward.

He brought his mouth to mine, mashing his lips against mine. I kissed him back, feeling my sleep flee in the face of the desire that was sparked by the kiss. The kiss intensified and heat began to surge through my body. I dropped my hand down between Kema’s legs to feel his cock, and he gave a small moan against my mouth when I began to knead the already-vibrant erection.

“I want you now, baby,” he gasped.

I consented by moving my hip close to his groin. He kissed me deeply once more, before scampering up off the bed for condoms and lubricant. I pulled off my boxers.

He was back in a jiffy, squeezing out generous helpings of lube into his hands, and began applying it to my ass hole. It felt really nice to be touched back there. He started lubing up my ass crack with his palm, then started working lubricant into my hole with his index finger. It really started to feel good when he wiggled the finger around, to open me up more. Soon, he had two fingers up my ass, which felt more uncomfortable, and I wasn’t sure if I’d be able to take much more than that. His cock was thicker and longer than his two fingers together. After a while, though, I got used to the feel of the two fingers in my butt, and he helped things along immensely when he leaned forward, bringing his face toward mine and kissing me deeply.

I was soon thrilling to the feel of his magical tongue in my mouth and talented fingers in my hole. I felt something like a jolt of pleasure every time his fingers stroked in and out. Finally, he inserted a third finger into my ass, which I was sure was going to split me, and winced. He took it slow and easy though, and soon the pain eased and I felt only pleasure there.

Soon, I began to get impatient with Kema, because I had gotten used to his three fingers up my rear end. He must have sensed this, because I could feel him pausing to apply more lubricant, this time to his sheathed cock.

Kema slowly withdrew his fingers from my ass, and then bent over to give my ass cheeks a sloppy wet kiss. I felt him straighten up, and then felt the head of his battering ram against my hole. I took a deep breath and instinctively tensed.

“Relax, baby…” he whispered as he kneaded my ass cheeks.

Soon, I felt the pressure of his cock head invading me, and a brief instant of pain as his head popped through my sphincter, followed by an incredible feeling of fullness. Slowly, very slowly, Kema slid his well-lubricated cock inside my ass hole, inch by wonderful inch, until I finally felt his stomach against my ass. Then, just as slowly he pulled it out, slowly, until I could feel a disappointingly empty sensation from his cock no longer filling me, except for the head, just behind my anus.

Faster now, he slid back in, deeper and deeper, then withdrew, slowly starting to hump me in earnest. I began moaning, as Kema’s rod rubbed up and down across my prostate, like a bow across a finely tuned violin.

Too soon, I felt Kema swiftly increase his fucking motion, and his cock seemed to swell to an even larger dimension inside my ass. He grabbed on tighter to my hips, and, pumping furiously, yelled, “Hot fuck! I’m cumming – oh, I’m cumming! OH, OH, YEAH, FUCK! FUCK! I LOVE FEELING YOUR HOT ASS CUNT ON MY BIG DICK! SUCK MY COCK WITH YOUR TIGHT HOLE! I’M FUCKING YOUR HOT TIGHT BOY CUNT – OH YEAH!”

As Kema lewdly told me how he was fucking my hot ass, the pleasure almost became too much for me. And then, he began spasming against my back, eventually slowing down his pumping and rested heavily on my back, spent.

“Wow, that was great, baby,” he heaved.

“I’m glad,” I murmured.

“You want to cum?”


I turned around and he slid down my body. Moments later, he was sucking my dick into his hot mouth. He had a great way of swirling his tongue around on my cock, while fingering my balls, that made me cum in a very short time.

I gave a satisfied sigh and relaxed back on the bed. He began to get up.

“Where are you going?” I said.

“Just a moment, baby…”

I didn’t persist. I didn’t have the compulsion to. I didn’t even bother to pull my boxers back on. With the exhaustion of my desire, my interrupted sleep was returning in waves, pulling me back into its drifting embrace.


I felt a shake of my body. I ignored the intrusion and clung tenaciously to my sleep.

The shake came again, and again.

My eyes snapped open, and through the fog of sleep, I stabbed an angry stare at Kema.

“What is it?” I croaked.

“Babe, I want you, please…”

I shut my eyes and then opened them slowly, in an effort to ascertain if this was actually happening, to be sure I hadn’t been looped back to my previous wakefulness.

He was still there, staring fervently at me, his hand on my back, which was to him because I was lying on my tummy.

“Kema, what’s the time?”

He shrugged. “I don’t know –”

“Check,” I snapped.

He moved to pick up his watch from the night stand. “It’s 12.15 am –”

“Can’t you wait till it’s at least dawn, so it’d be morning sex?”

“Baby, no, I’m hard – see, just feel it…” He began to pull my hand down toward his groin.

I snatched my hand back before it could find purchase. My head was starting to pound with the irritation of my interrupted sleep, and the queasiness I felt when I came here was beginning to seep through my system.

“Gawd, Kema, I need sleep –”

“And I need you!” It was his turn to snap.

Startled, I turned my head to peer up at his face. His features were arranged in a mask; only his eyes were alive. They were fervid with want.

“You have already fucked me – what, thirty, forty minutes ago? I’m still sore down there –”

“I’ll be gentle, don’t worry.”

“No, Kema. I’m tired. I’m sore. And I need my sleep.”

He didn’t bother with a verbal response. He simply clamped a vise-like grip on both my upper arms and slid his body atop my behind.

“What are you doing?” I said, my heartbeat quickening.

He balanced himself on top of me, nestling his crotch against my rear. His erection moved this way and that across my ass cheeks.

“Kema, come on, seriously, stop this.” I tried to move, but his hands kept my arms pinned to the bed. “Kema, stop…!”

“Let us just do this,” he ground out.

“No, we can’t!” I seethed, and began trying to pull my hands from his grasp.

He tightened his grip and rocked his hip forward in a bid to thrust his cock in through my ass crack. I moved my posterior sideways and he missed.

“Stay still, goddamnit!” he hissed.

“Get off me!” I fumed, my heart beating faster now. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“I want to fuck –”

“Well, I say no!”

“You can’t say no to me!”

Fear spasmed in my belly as I realized what was happening. “Kema, no – NO!” A surge of energy erupted inside me, and I began to twist, pulling at my imprisoned hands. I dislodged the grip on my left hand, and was using it to pull myself upward, when he grabbed it, wrenched it down in a motion that pulled me back down on the bed.

“Kema, please…!”

He dropped his body down on my back, knocking the air out of me in a whoosh. This was unfortunate, because the cool air circulating in the room from the air conditioner seemed to have turned stifling in the corner where my head was turned to, gradually lessening the clean air I could assess.

Our bodies turned slick with sweat as we writhed about and struggled on the bed. He was trying to get his cock inside me; I was just as determined not to let him.

“Stop fighting this, Declan…” he panted.

“Gerroff me, you bastard…” I gasped.

As we fought, the sick feeling inside me intensified. My stomach heaved, and I gasped, frantically seeking oxygen. My eyes watered as I clawed at the bed, attempting to pull myself forward and away from Kema’s oppressive weight on me.

“Kema, please…I need air…” I choked out.

“Just – mmf! Let me…”

My stomach was roiling faster now, weakening me. Sensing my depleting strength, Kema seized his chance, took aim with his hip once again, and thrust viciously forward. His erection cut clean through my cheeks and dived into my ass hole. The fierce penetration collapsed the control my body had been holding up against my nausea. My stomach growled one last time, and I felt a surge of substance cascade down my alimentary canal.

“Gerroff, gerroff, gerroff, my shit’s coming!”

He wasn’t listening. He pulled out and was preparing to get back in when fecal matter spurted right out, after his dick.

“Holy shit!” he shrieked, drawing back hastily.

Holy shit is right.

“Declan, whaddafuck –”

“Fuck off!” I roared, immediately turning and scrambling out of the bed, not minding the stains I was letting trail my escape from the bed.

“Look, babe, I’m sorry –”

“Don’t you ever fucking touch me again!” I snarled.

I sprinted for the bathroom. I got in and slammed shut the door, making sure it was locked before getting into the shower stall. I turned on the hot spray on me, and stood there as the water sluiced down my body, shaking from a chill that tormented me in the parts of my body that the hot water would never be able to get to.

Written by Pink Panther

Previous Those Awkward Moments (Episode 14)

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  1. kei
    September 22, 05:40 Reply

    What is it?” I croaked.

    “Babe, I want you, please…”

    I shut my eyes and then opened them slowly, in an effort to ascertain if this was actually happening, to be sure I hadn’t been looped back to my previous wakefulness.”

    I cant stop laughing. Nice piece, trouble in paradise. Declan needs sex more often, yes?

  2. Hema (Formerly Enkayced)
    September 22, 05:56 Reply

    For the first time, i’m first to comment.
    Ok, forceful penetration even from a boyfriend should still be looked at as rape.
    I’ve never done that to anyone and sure as hell, anyone who pulls that stunt on me won’t have the chance to try it again.
    I lost a very good friendship for this exact reason!
    We had been great friends for 5 years, never had sex.
    The most we had gone was a 3 minute kiss and seeing as i think penetrative sex is overrated, i didn’t push it.
    Now one day, a bunch of days after his birthday(which i missed because i was working), i go round to his end after work intent on sleeping over.
    I had slept over several times and we had never ever even talked about sex, talkless of the act.
    Then comes 12:30am and i start feeling some funny push-pull reactions.
    The night was a mess, there was a verbal exchange and we haven’t spoken since then.
    OAN Pinky, I saw that shade you threw with the Gay Porn analogy and I know who its for… Oh i know!
    *stirs chamomile tea*
    Pinky bia, kedu my ‘thing’? Gwam okwu!

    • Pink Panther
      September 22, 06:01 Reply

      Your thing? How can you be talking about your thing on KD, eh? Do you want all these spwelt shudren to start thinking one kain one kain?

  3. KingBey
    September 22, 06:05 Reply

    Which kain yeye BF be this…..acting out of control because of porn. Good a thing Declan painted his room… up will definitely reduce his crazed konji. But wait o, he almost fucked you without a CD if not that you painted? Hian ! See rape ! Hahaha

  4. Jamie
    September 22, 06:06 Reply

    Awful experience…
    Does Declan get to dump Kema for Iyke? Or love surpases all, after Kema’s pleadings….???
    …I might be too boring but, my familiarity with porn is very limited too.

  5. Francis
    September 22, 06:22 Reply

    Some people need to learn how to masturbate sha. Mscheeeeww

  6. Mandy
    September 22, 06:23 Reply

    Jisox! What a horn-dog! The consequence (the staining) is well deserved.

  7. shuga chocolata
    September 22, 06:28 Reply

    Sit just got real. if I was declan, will just put otapipia inside his tea next morning. That’s how I feel for mike. Dude sho go do thanksgiving that my bff talked me outta it. Rape Is bad!!!

  8. Mitch
    September 22, 06:41 Reply

    Relationship or no, non-consensual sex is very wrong. Kema went too far. And Pinky, try giving Declan a happy life na. Irriz noronly problem tha fit him.

    • Pink Panther
      September 22, 07:18 Reply

      Hahahahahahaa! Mitch, your request has been taken under advisement.

    • Pink Panther
      September 22, 07:19 Reply

      But u know what Teflondon would say, don’t you? That life is not about blissful lives and happy endings. 😀

      • Mitch
        September 22, 08:36 Reply

        Ummm, is that (Teflondon) the name of a person, animal, place or thing? Puh-leeze!

  9. pete
    September 22, 06:56 Reply

    Ghen Ghen Ghen!!!

  10. Khaleesi
    September 22, 07:28 Reply

    This Pinky sha! You’re one kain devious maid! The way you described the first round of sex was so damned descriptive,even a straight man who’s never had sex with a man will understand and feel what its like to bottom. The description was so damned good! And … you’re such a mess for how you describe the generous serving of gravy … tops learn: a seasoned bottom usually knows best whether or not he’s ready for sex @a particular point in time; listen to him

  11. Kristopher B!
    September 22, 08:09 Reply

    Ewww… I can imagine the odour n hit splattered all over the bed. Pinky this was intense, but that Declan sure has attitude problems. See how he snubbed Iyke’s whatsapp message… Why does this Kema guy give me a mental picture of Sinnex?

  12. KryxxX
    September 22, 08:24 Reply



    What have you gotten yourself into………… again!
    This thing is now like a Wilson Taagbo something oh! One week one trouble! Might be the ppl from the village working overtime on his matter! Dear lawd, let yours light shinneth on this shild!

    And as for Kema, dude had it coming! He had it coming in a spray can! For real! Its not like he didn’t give u some that night! What nonsense! Am so angry right now! Was in almost similar situation! Dude tried to overpower me but the shocker came when he asked me to stick it in him??! The horror! I was like “Bitch what?!”. Let’s just say he never saw my break lights again! Idiats!

  13. Dennis Macaulay
    September 22, 08:36 Reply

    What is sad is that a lot of people find themselves in this situation all the time and end up being raped.

    Really sad! No means No! Abi that doesn’t apply to men?

    Meanwhile pardon my naivety, how is gay sex random? I thought a lot of cleaning and preparation rituals go down before penetration? Abi Oga just chuks the thing inside?

    • Francis
      September 22, 08:49 Reply

      Some peeps are just lucky. Their diet allows for “clean” bowel movements. Slip on a condom and you’re good to go though no rimming allowed in that case.

  14. Tiercel de Claron
    September 22, 10:07 Reply

    Let me rain on this parade a bit.The SSMPA was conferenced out and passed by both chambers Dec 17,2013 and signed into law Jan 7,2014.May 29 of any year,since 1999,has always been a public holiday.No official business is conducted that day.Pinky,take note.

    • Pink Panther
      September 22, 10:29 Reply

      Speaking of this issue, TDC, please could u send me a mail or something. I have some research questions I’d like to ask you. Google is being no help here.

      • Tiercel de Claron
        September 22, 10:41 Reply

        Can’t say I rightly remember your email.Send me a mail with your questions,
        I would’ve suggested my facebook inbox,but I don’t wanna overload your system with too much shock

    September 22, 13:42 Reply

    Nothing turns me off that the “Please do this for me, am hard please”… wtf? like am some machine to satisfy your urge?.. Try forcing your dick on ma ass and I promise ur loosing it that day

  16. sinnex
    September 22, 16:48 Reply

    PP, I see what you did. You did not just do what I think you did!!!

    I saw something and I am like WTF…

    • Pink Panther
      September 22, 21:55 Reply

      Beht why is everyone seeing what I did that I don’t know I did? :'(

  17. Ace
    September 22, 19:28 Reply

    Wow… Brilliant as always Pinky! Really brilliant.

  18. Max
    September 22, 20:21 Reply

    “Holy shit!” he shrieked, drawing back hastily’
    ?????????????? serves him right. Lmfao

  19. Grizzly Bear
    September 23, 00:23 Reply

    Really nice. Shocking though how porn can turn one into an animal

    • Francis
      September 23, 05:53 Reply

      Porn kwa?! Nna press pause oh, nobory download porn pass me and I ain’t this sick upstairs. No blame this one on porn abeg.

      • Pink Panther
        September 23, 05:57 Reply

        In a way, he has a point. Not like porn turns anyone into animals. But it can serve as a catalyst for such behaviour, that is, for those who have it in them to be animals. When they watch porn, they get konjified. And then the demons rise from within, and the nearest ass (or pussy) is fair-game.

        • Francis
          September 23, 06:11 Reply

          Hmmm, all these folks that can’t separate make believe from real life sha. Maybe porn needs to start coming with obvious disclaimers screaming “This shit ain’t real. Try it at home and get your teeth knocked out” lol

  20. Dashawn
    September 25, 07:02 Reply

    Hmmmmmn *sips earl grey* Now this is why I love this series. Though at a point I thought pinky had decided to give up on it! *side eyes*
    The issue of being aroused by porn is not something that is strange or foreign. Some guys sometimes need porn to kick start the activities of the night. But when a bottom says no, he means no! Let me tell you what should have happened: The kema of an idiot should have tried rimming Declan after that forceful thrust in, so that he will have a mouthful of shit. Trust me, he will be celibate for months!!! ???????? anyways, nice one pinky.

    OAN: Pinky, I’d like to throw in a suggestion on a question that maybe the house can answer. “Why is it that bottoms (and sometimes confused tops) like throwing “Shade”? Is it neccesary???

    • Pink Panther
      September 25, 07:08 Reply

      Um, could you elaborate, Dashawn? I don’t quite understand your question. 🙂

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