Dear KD: How Can I Get Back My Ass?

Dear KD: How Can I Get Back My Ass?

While growing up, I used to have a really protrusive derriere, an ass that could compete with those of the bodacious girls around me then. I was mortified by it. It wasn’t like this hefty junk in the trunk that I was carrying about, but it was an ass that was big enough that people noticed and commented on.

I’m currently on the verge of starting my postgraduate studies and at this age, I have outgrown a lot of insecurities, including my self-consciousness regarding my ass.

Problem is: I do not have that ass anymore. My behind is utterly flat, to the point I feel awkward whenever I dress with my shirt tucked in.

And to think that I’m a Versatile who loves to bottom makes the whole situation worse. Although, my boyfriend seems not to have issue with my ass – or the lack of it (at least, he hasn’t said anything negative about it, nor has he complimented my derriere), however, I still find myself feeling very uncomfortable with the new behind that I’ve grown into.

I know this sounds superficial, but insecurities are valid. And this is mine. And I would just like to kindly ask for someone to suggest to me how I can get back my cakes.

Submitted by Bammy

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  1. Bhawscity
    November 10, 06:54 Reply

    Squats does the tricks for some. I have a friend who’s straight, but if you see his ass ehhh? Dude has more ass than females and he got it tru Squats. Anyways me I have tried and tried but nothing is coming out on my own. Bless up!

  2. Keredim
    November 10, 09:09 Reply

    People say doing squats in the gym help, but I think that tones or firms up whatever gluteal muscles that are already there.

    From what you are saying they are not there.

    So if you are really desperate, I’d reach out to Nicki Minaj, if i were you.

  3. Francis
    November 10, 09:09 Reply

    How did you lose the ass? Retrace ya steps. If na diet you go do, begin undo the diet. They say squats work but unfortunately no be for everybody as some gym rats flat die compared to them general body

  4. soty
    November 10, 10:49 Reply

    Just do what you used to do to get the ass back if it’s in you it’s gonna come back you could come get some of mine it’s heavy on me

  5. Bee
    November 10, 12:03 Reply

    Squats don’t work for everybody, wow … that’s a new one ?

    I was born really flat. Throughout my childhood and up until some months ago, I was very flat. When I figured I preferred bottoming, I began to feel very uncomfortable of my flat ass. My best friend told me to squat and it’s working like magic. I’m still squatting, but not at a gym. I do mine whenever I’m done pooping; I squat to clean my ass. I poop thrice a week on average. But now, I’m growing hips too, not just ass and I love them! My sashay’s more pronounced. ?

    I think doing it on a daily basis (like at the gym) eats up the muscles or something ? … I don’t know. I’m just shocked how it doesn’t work for somay’all. If it doesn’t work for you, you’re probably meant to have a flat ass so learn to love it. I mean, I’d have done same if my squats weren’t working.

  6. Dickson Clement
    November 10, 14:29 Reply

    Basically, there is a squatting technique that builds the thigh more and a technique that builds the gluts. This implies that the technique you adopt will influence your results. Therefore, I believe squatting works but it depends on technique and frequency.

    Also, your new gluteal muscle loss may be due to growth and take over of testosterone which remodels the adolescent body, baking out a more masculine body frame. For instance, there may be other changes which you are thankful for but you probably didn’t notice!!
    Nevertheless, embrace what nature has made of you, do more squats ( check you tube on the correct technique for squatting) and I heard bottoming and taking the white fluid up your ass does a lot of magic- lols! To the best of my professional knowledge, that is totally laughable. Finally, should you consider buying your way out of it, I will suggest reaching out to the Kardashians, Nikky would have forgotten whose knife she’s been under!!

  7. Patrick
    November 10, 14:56 Reply

    So what you people are saying is that bottoms should aspire towards a big ass because a flat ass is a minus if you are a bottom?

    *asking for a flat-bottom friend*

    • Delle
      November 10, 19:35 Reply

      Lol. Sounds more like you’re asking for you!?

      • Patrick
        November 11, 03:58 Reply

        I solemnly swear, I was asking for a flat-bottom friend??

  8. J
    November 10, 18:23 Reply

    Darling, it’s not about the ass cheeks, but the intensity of the anus. Fear not child.

    • Patrick
      November 11, 04:14 Reply

      Thank you J.
      I find your take credible seeing as you are a self-confessed bootylicious somebody.
      What my friend lacks in ass cheeks, he more than makes up for in ‘intensity of the anus’ ?

      • J
        November 11, 19:54 Reply

        “Self-confessed bootylicious somebody” ? Abeg ooo, my glutes are just manageable ☺ He should try all the glute exercises, otherwise embrace what mother nature has given him.

  9. Decky
    November 12, 15:04 Reply

    Am sure i can get you in touch with Kim Kardashian, so you can learn few tips from her or you visit Botched as another solution to your question

  10. Mike
    October 29, 13:54 Reply

    Take muscle building supplements, do squats and sit up. A protruding ass is a combination of a lot of things, not just fats/muscles. Their is your generally body posture/ structure, if you’ve got profound s’curve, you’ll naturally come across like you’ve got ass wether your fat or skinny. I know a kid like that, short and skinny who turns me the hell on, cause he looks like he’s got an ass by his body structure, especially on sport shorts, he’s lacking in body mass, the kind I like, but his behind shots and e no get nyash.

    Your thighs and waist length is another contributing thing, that why you need situps, you want it tight, so it shots your form out.

    You probably lost all that boyish fat as you grow up, forgive me. But nothing makes for a sorry tale than that, I’m literally in tears right now.

    You can get the suppliments on jumia or any good pharmacy, it will build up your generally body mass, the sit-up and squats is you directing it where to go.

    People should literally calm down and design themselves, what they wanna build, what should be more profound, what you want less etc, this will than direct on the type of workout that best suits you, avoid anything cardiovascular or too intensive, since you wanna build up mass, not burn it, for example jogging would burn way more muscle mass, than weight lifting. You see those guys in the gym way carry hand like trailer, them no dey jog, if not their body would align itself to a more calculated form.

    You want ass, do squats and sit-ups, Call me when you’ve got it, let’s take it for a test drive and test it’s grit.

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