Uncle David isn’t really my uncle. He is my mother’s adopted brother. He was my first crush and I remember growing up as a young adult, I would watch with wonder how his sweaty body glistened in the hot sunlight as he whistled with joy while washing my father’s car. Though he was extremely hard working, kind and always jovial, my mother had an exceptional hatred for him. Till this day, she believes his mother was the reason her father left her mother.

Truth is, her mother was forced on her father and she was (and is still) a nightmare to the man. David’s mother was the woman my grandfather loved, but she was from a tribe he was forbidden to marry from. She (David’s mother) married another man and gave birth to David. But because she was still in love with my grandfather, her marriage didn’t work. My grandfather took her in and cared for her and her son, even though David wasn’t his. After David’s mother died, my grandfather took him as a son.

I was very fond of David and always stayed glued to him. I wanted to be anywhere he went. I remember he was fond of our neighbour’s house girl and anytime they were together, I would become extremely jealous and he would notice. He would then try to cheer me up and give me attention just to make me happy. Several nights, I would go to his room in the middle of the night and touch him. Sometimes he would have an erection and let me touch it. But he wouldn’t let me bring his dick out of his boxers, and that was how far it went.

Several times, when my mum would order us not to give him any food, I always gave him my portion and went hungry. He would look at me with gratitude and on few occasions, he would joke about me wanting him to marry me.

One day, I came home from boarding school to find David gone. I soon learned that my mother, apparently unable to contain her resentment for him any longer, had thrown him out. I was so furious that when my mother came back from wherever she went to, I screamed at her and called her wicked. Reacting to my insolence, she hit me. That was the first time she laid her hand on me. When my father came back from work, he was told what happened. He scolded me and asked me to apologise. I refused.

Consequently, the gist became that “David has used witchcraft to charm me against my mother”. That was how she started taking me from one prayer house to another so that they can “untie” my sense.

I really missed David and it seemed he completely disappeared because all efforts trying to find him was to no avail.

Life went on and about almost eleven years later, a miracle occurred.

I was doing my youth service when I came across someone from my hometown. She recognised me instantly but I couldn’t place her face. She was related to me from my maternal side of the family. We quickly became friends and she invited me over to her flat. While going through her wedding photos, I saw a familiar figure clad in a navy uniform among the groom’s men. It didn’t take me long to recognise it to belong to David. He looked so different. From my hometown girl, I learned he was doing well and now stayed in Uyo. He was her husband’s colleague. I asked for his number and she said she would ask the husband. She called her husband and I spoke briefly with him, after which he gave me David’s number.

I was nervous as I sat outside hat night, holding my phone, his digits typed out on the screen. Then I took a deep breath and dialed the number.

The phone rang a few times and then a deep commanding voice bellowed, “Yes?”

Cold shivers travelled down my spine as my mouth went dry. “Uncle D…” was all I could say. I was the only one who called him that.

The line went silent for a few seconds.

“Jacob?” he finally said. “Is that really you?” When I responded in the affirmative, he went completely ballistic. He was so excited.

“I’ve missed you so much…” I began saying. “I’m sorry for what my mother did –”

“It was all to the glory of God. You don’t need to apologise,” he replied reassuringly. He asked me to hang up so he could call me back. He wanted me to save my airtime.

I hung up and he called back immediately, and we went on to speak for over two hours. He suggested we do a midnight call and I agreed.

David was relating with me like I was a grown man and I liked it. We laughed and reminisced about old times. At some point in our conversation, I told him I still loved him. He went quiet for some seconds and asked me who my girlfriend was. I instantly became cold at the question and he noticed. I woodenly told him I was not looking for a girlfriend. He asked me why I was answering him “somehow” and if it was because he mentioned “girlfriend”. “You’re still the same. You haven’t changed,” he teased. “What of the babe wey get that better ass?” he asked.

Earlier on, while waiting for the midnight call hour, we had exchanged photos on WhatsApp and among the photos I sent him, I included a photo of my fresh and well-oiled bubble butt; the nude photo bore no face.

“Guy, hook me up with the babe wey get that sweet ass nah,” he said. “Nawa for you o.”

“You dey fuck ass?” I asked.

“Na wetin dey sweet pass nah. E tight pass toto,” he answered. “I no mind if babe ugly or no get boobi. But make she get better nyash like that one for that pic, and I’m ready to go.”

He sounded really thirsty.

He also informed me that he could not date a girl who couldn’t take it up the ass, and lamented on how he was sex starved because Nigerian girls were not adventurous enough for anal sex, and even the ones who attempted it were not clean.

“So when last did you fuck an ass?” I asked, now curious.

“It’s been long o,” he said.

When I told him the butt in the photo was actually mine, he said I was lying and was trying to discourage him.

“Chop alone o,” he said with a laugh.

When we were rounding up the call, I told him “I love you” again. He laughed this time and said, “Go bring that babe with sweet nyash.”

He’d invited me to his house and I was beyond excited. A few days later, I took a bus from Awka to Uyo. When I arrived, he was waiting for me in the park. He looked far better than his photos and from the last time I saw him. He was more athletically built and definitely more handsome. We hugged and greeted each other. Then we got into his car and drove off too his house.

“Welcome to my pad,” he said as we drove into the compound. It was a duplex still in progress. The top part of the building was not yet completed but the bottom was. He told me he owned the building and asked me to help him “beg Baba God on his behalf for more money so he can complete his project”.

“After you have spent all your money on women, abi?” I said sarcastically.

“God forbid. I don’t do that o! Do you see any girl in my house? They run away from me because I don’t give them jack shit. I’m a father already and that is it. In fact I can’t even do the husband thing sef…such responsibilities is way out of my league.”

“Wow. You have a child?” I was surprised by that.

“Yes I do. He’s four and lives with his mother in Canada.”

I felt a stir of jealousy, and as usual, he noticed.

“You don come again!” he said with a smile. “What’s that face for? It’s just a mutual agreement to co-parent. Nothing extra.”

“You’re just too complicated.”

“I know, right? But it’s just me. I don’t trust women.”

“So that is how you will use and discard the babe with the ass on that pic, eh?”

He laughed hard and said, “For that one, I can break the rules, provided she lets me go inside.”

He had good interior taste and there was a large portrait of a gorgeous boy with big afro hair hanging in the living room. His son was just adorable. There were three bedrooms on the ground floor, but only his room was habitable, so that was where I had to stay.

He sent his gateman to buy us food. We ate, watched TV, and then he took me on a tour round the house. Afterwards, he told me he was going to the decking area to smoke and drink. He asked me if I drank or smoked and I said occasionally.

We both went up to the decking with some whiskey and weed. As we sat there, overlooking the town in the sunset, we talked about life’s struggles and our hopes.

Soon, I began to get sleepy and I told David I was going to bed. He told me he would join me later, after he was done smoking his last roll of weed (he’d already smoked two joints). He raised the bottle of whiskey to me as if to say, “I still got to finish this too.”

I went back into the flat downstairs and took my shower. I knew David had already consumed too much weed and alcohol and I thought perhaps I might use that to my advantage. I douched properly and oiled my body while paying extra attention to my bum. I also lubricated my ass properly. I put the A.C on full blast and laid on the bed, positioning my derriere in such a way as to enhance its already luscious volume. I knew he would recognise the ass from the photo and I was sure seeing it live through the lens of weed and alcohol might work a miracle.

I had almost drifted off to sleep but came back on full alert when I heard the room door open.

“Fuck!” I heard him mutter to himself.

I smiled inwardly, positive that he had seen my voluptuous ass. The room was dead quiet except for the low hum of the AC. He made an attempt to call my name but choked on it. He cleared his throat and called me again. I answered him faintly, acting like I was asleep.

“Cover yourself so you don’t catch cold,” he mumbled.

I looked up at him. “Now you see that I was not lying,” I said, adding humour to my voice.

“Men! I wouldn’t have believed o. This isn’t a man’s ass. Are you sure you’re not a woman?” He was teasing. “Men! Cover that ass joor.”

I knew he was fighting his urge. So instead of obeying him, I laughed and arched my hip higher while parting my ass cheeks wide.

“Stop this shit, mhen!” he growled, and threw the duvet over me. He told me he wanted to sleep as he got into bed beside me.

I wasn’t to be deterred. I boldly reached for his dick. After all, it wasn’t a new thing.

“What is with you and my dick?” he asked tiredly.

“I want to get fucked by it,” I said the words with a moan.

My fingers groped his crotch. He had tucked his dick in between his thighs, but I could still feel the rock-hardness of it.

“I’m no homo and that’s not possible,” he said.

I ignored him and got up to sit astride him, atop his groin with my back to him.

“Men, stand up,” he said without much conviction.

I leaned forward and began tonguing his legs and toes. I sucked on them real good. As I did so, I could hear him struggle with his moans. When he couldn’t help it any longer, his hands fiercely grabbed my ass.

He groaned harshly, “You’re fucking turning me on, nigga!”

He was now slowly raising his hips to meet my grind.

Mission accomplished!

I turned and pulled off his shorts. And there it was! His thick, black, banana-shaped dick! After all these years, it was finally in my sight. I almost cried with reverent pleasure.

I moved down on him and began sucking his dick. His hands were still squeezing my bum as I rolled my hips slowly about. I gently moved my ass into his face, indicating that I wanted him to eat me.

“Wow, booty like a bitch!” he moaned.

He gave me few spanks and parted my cheeks. I twitched my hole and pushed out my rectum like I was forcing out a dump.

“Oooh-lah-lah!” he panted. “Do that magic again.”

As I did, I felt his entire mouth on my ass hole. He began eating and chewing me. He pulled my ass so wide apart, I felt like he would rip me in half. I went for his cock again and forced myself to deep-throat him. He pulled my ass further into his face, hungrily eating me out.

I was practically having an out-of-body experience at this point. I had to squat over his face as he devoured me like a mad lion. He began sticking his finger into me roughly, but that didn’t hurt much because I was loose from the intense rimming. He kept rimming me as he made an effort to kneel on the bed. He held my butt cheeks to his face as if my ass would run away if he let go. Indeed he was an ass worshipper. A proper pervert.

I was now partially squatting but with my hands on the bed while he knelt behind me, still licking the honey pot. He stood up but not fully. I reached out for his dick from under my legs and moistened the swollen shaft with a generous amount of my saliva.

Instinct must have told both of us it was time for the action because we simultaneously made an attempt to lie down. As I parted my legs and placed my chest on the bed, I heard him mutter, “Oh fuck!”

I felt his dick head rub my rectum. I shook my ass like a stripper and I heard him chuckle with glee. He was loving every second of this.

He went slowly inside me and as he did so, he gasped and withdrew his dick from my ass.

“Delicious,” he moaned, and then said, “Get ready.”

I was about to take a deep breath of fortification when I felt all of his dick slide deep inside me.

SHIT!!! The hurt felt so good.

“You want this, don’t you?” he whispered into my ear as he began thrusting hard.

The feel of his hairy stomach and chest on my back was something I can’t even explain. I’d been longing for this moment since I was fourteen years old and having him fuck me was nothing less than a dream come true.

He fucked me with military precision and all I could do was moan and cry tears of joy. I came twice without touching myself. It was that good. He stayed for almost an hour (if not more) before he came. As he was rollercoastered to his orgasm, he bit my shoulder hard, groaning in ecstasy as he spasmed behind me.

Immediately he came, he passed out…more like slept off. We were both facing the wrong side of the bed so I tried to position him correctly. I changed the sheets – with him on them – and also his clothes. Then I went to the bathroom to clean up, and when I looked in the mirror, I noticed he had bruised my shoulder with his teeth and it hurt.

I got back into bed and joined him in slumber.

The next morning I woke up before him, sent the security at the gate to buy me some food items and began tidying the house. When the gateman came back, I began preparing breakfast. I was doing my thing in the kitchen when I heard lots of voices come into the house. A voice asked who was responsible for the delicious aroma coming from the kitchen and another shouted that David had gotten a girlfriend. They all roared with laughter and shouted “Miracle”. I didn’t leave the kitchen. I heard them call out to David and made their way to the bedroom.

A few minutes later, David came into the kitchen. He looked really dazed and mashed up. He had a slight frown on his face. I greeted him and he grunted in response.

One of his friends came into the kitchen and David introduced me to him as my mother’s son. Apparently, this guy too was from my maternal hometown and also knew my mother’s family. He welcomed me and praised my cooking.

David asked me if the food was enough for everyone and I told him no. He asked if I could make for all his friends; at that point, they were already clamouring for me to bring what I was cooking. He gave me some money and I asked the gateman to get me more food items.

While I was cooking, David was busy getting ready some drinks. Then he stopped and looked at me for a while. Though I wasn’t looking directly at him, from the corner of my eyes, I could see from his countenance that he was recollecting what happened last night between us. I didn’t say anything, just let him think whatever he wanted to think.

“Stays between us, right?” he finally said. There was a coldness in his voice – an implied threat, chilly in its delivery.

His eyes were still on me and I knew he wanted an answer.

“On my life and honour,” I answered.

“Good,” he said. “And sorry about your shoulder… You deserve it anyway,” he said as he playfully poked my ribs the way he did many years ago.

And then he left the kitchen and returned to the sitting room to meet his hommies.

I served them all food and one of them joked about kidnapping me to come and cook for him. I saw a flash of anger and jealousy diluted with a bit of nervousness in David’s eyes at this.

“E no be cook,” he objected.

They all complimented my meal and later that day, we all went out. All through the outing, I could feel David’s eyes on me. I knew he was definitely hooked and still had the taste of my sex on him. Occasionally we would lock eyes and I would see a beast ready to devour me at any opportunity.

And devour he did, when we got back home.

Absolutely nothing remains the same after a good man’s ass.

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  1. trystham
    August 02, 09:02 Reply

    Looool. The kain objectivity that comes with infatuation. See as e take disavow im mama for Uncle D. I went crazy looking for whether this shii was fiction or not. It had a tinge of both.

  2. Delle
    August 02, 09:05 Reply

    This was just too wrong it felt right.
    For a weather like this, this is not encouraging ?

  3. YONCÉ
    August 02, 09:57 Reply

    This piece has me feeling hot and bothered.. lol…

  4. Mitch
    August 02, 13:41 Reply

    Why would you post something like this today, Pinky?
    You want to remind me of my bae-less state, abi?
    Wehdone oh

    • Pink Panther
      August 02, 16:04 Reply

      Hehehee! Keep hope alive, dear. Your David will soon come.

  5. Foxydevil
    August 03, 06:55 Reply

    A badly rehearsed version of kicky 1000 gay short story “seducing my father in law”
    Where is IBK when you need him, these stories are getting more mediocre by the day. ???

  6. Richard Moore
    August 05, 23:54 Reply

    Whoever wrote this… Weh done ooooo. Just know that someone is watching you in 5D.
    Miss you guys.

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